KAYLEBERTY

My Top 10 Films of 2011

2011-12-30T14:19:00.000-08:00

This is my favorite blog of the year. It’s the reason I saw 134 films. While this wasn't the greatest year in film, there were plenty of excellent films. And while there was a distinct award season, a lot of the hits came throughout 2011. Here we go:

My Top 10 Films of 2011

1) HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS – PART 2 [A-]

It’s the second half of a 4 1/2 hour epic. It’s the triumphant climax of seven stories. With excellent filmmaking, powerful storytelling, seasoned actors, invested fans, and the skilled hand of four-time Potter director David Yates, the Boy Who Lived has never been better. I haven’t read the books, so I speak solely as someone who marveled at an IMAX screen.

2) MARGIN CALL [A-]

It’s the sleeper that should have been huge. It’s the indie hit of the year. From writer-director J.C. Chandor, it’s an into-the-night drama about the fall of a large investment bank during the 2008 financial crises. The direction pulsates with a captivating urgency. Kevin Spacey, Zackary Quinto, Simon Baker, Jeremy Irons, and Stanley Tucci all give incredible, pitch-perfect performances.

3) THE TREE OF LIFE [A-]

I mauled over this film for a long time. The narrative is scattered, the imagery is trippy, and the human story is somber and heartbreaking. But Terrance Malick’s masterpiece is a unique and profound achievement. Melancholia had a similar dysfunctional-family-meets-cosmos story but couldn’t pull it off. I love the abstract philosophy and the way nature and grace were illustrated through a 1950s family as well as the very fabric of the universe. Brad Pitt and Jessica Chastain (the ultimate newcomer) were terrific. And Alexandre Desplat’s score (Deathly Hallows) is best we’re likely to hear.

4) THE HELP [A-]

Adapting Kathryn Stockette’s best-seller into a film that balances heavy subject matter with comedy and spirit is challenging, but writer-director Tate Taylor succeeds. The story is uplifting, humorous, interesting, and thrives on the performances. The ensemble (the anti-thesis of Margin Call) includes Emma Stone (with a glowing embodiment), Bryce Dallas Howard (always good), Jessica Chastain (she can do no wrong), Viola Davis (Oscar-worthy), and Octavia Spencer (excellent).

5) BRIDESMAIDS [A-]

There are few things more lovable than a groundbreaking comedy. It has six female leads (all genius), the guidance of director Paul Feig and producer Judd Apatow, and Kristen Wiig (the SNL, comedy-writer wunderkind) giving a fearless performance as the fed up maid-of-dishonor. She hits rock bottom, goes through hell, but makes it through (thanks to Melissa McCarthy). The humor is painful, awkward, and effective.

6) THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO [A-]

David Fincher is cementing his status as a film giant. He’s at his best when adapting great authors (Chuck Palahniuk, Robert Graysmith, F. Scott Fitzgerald) with great screenwriters (Eric Roth, Aaron Sorkin). With his latest, he adapts Stieg Larsson’s cult classic with the great Steve Zaillian (Schindler’s List). Dragon has Fincher’s signature dark, moody style. It’s haunting, beautiful, intense, and slick. But all this would have fallen flat if it wasn’t for Rooney Mara’s Oscar-worthy performance.

7) BEGINNERS [A-]

It sounds like an indie trap – it’s a semi-autobiographical tale (from Mike Mills) about a single man (Ewan McGregor) who helps his dying and newly-gay father (Christopher Plummer). But it’s a true and elegant tale with great style. It succeeds because it holds back. All the drama is real – it’s not overdone. It’s honest, interesting, and a sweet, whimsical love story (with Mélanie Laurent).

8) DRIVE [A-]

Drive is a rare, instant classic. Nicolas Refn directs a dark, gritty, LA noir tale. It’s hypnotic with a brutal elegance. Ryan Gosling is the actor of a generation. He communicates in body language, we learn about Driver (his habits, his mind, his soul) with little dialogue. The soundtrack is sweet, the driving scenes are top notch, and Christina Hendricks is a punk-pulp hottie.

9) J. EDGAR [A-]

J.Edgar marked the beginning of award season and it’s everything I want in a solid, historical drama. Clint Eastwood (the pro) teams up with Dustin Lance Black (a well-read scribe) and Leonardo DiCaprio (a great performance). The make-up is imperfect and the ending stalls but there is plenty of captivating, FBI, obsessive man-hunt, mother-issue drama to fill this period piece.

10) M: I – GHOST PROTOCOL [A-]

Brad Bird did the impossible. The master of animation (The Incredibles) becomes the master of action-adventure. The Tom Cruise spy movie (in wonderful IMAX) is an old-school, creative romp with riveting and awe-inspiring sequences. Its none-stop action spaced out with slick characters – and it’s better than we all expected.

Honorable Mentions

YOUNG ADULT [A-]

My love for Team Juno (Jason Reitman and Diablo Cody) stays strong. Young Adult is too bitter and too real to be a new classic but is it good. It’s about Charlize Theron and the distant hope of redemption. She hits rock bottom, she breaks down, and she almost gives up. Then, as she’s using people, she starts to feel grateful. She starts to appreciate life. She begins anew. She’s the hot mess that we can’t take our eyes off.

MARTHA MARCY MAY MARLENE [B+]

I include this film only because I fell in love with Elizabeth Olsen while watching it. There are some flaws and the character is frustrating at times but damn if she didn’t turn me into a creature of devotion and obsession. She was so good at being her. She’s confident and strong, outspoken and real, damaged, and vulnerable.

Caleb S Garcia
December 30, 2011

Steven Spielberg: The Complete Works

2011-12-28T20:28:00.000-08:00

December 2011

Steven Spielberg is the greatest director of all time. His body of work is immense and impressive - each film is worth seeing just to see Spielberg's fingerprints. This month, he has two new films out. Where do these films rank with the others? Well, I have seen the complete works of Spielberg and here I rank them in descending order of greatness. Check out all 30 films below:

The Complete Works of Steven Spielberg

1) SCHINDLER’S LIST (1993) [A]
It’s epic and it’s mighty. It’s Spielberg’s most important film. He holds back and executes an un-filmable story in a masterful way. It will make you feel things.

2) JAWS (1975) [A]
Its Spielberg’s greatest achievement; a 28-year-old’s masterpiece. The film pulsates with the skill of an obsessive perfectionist. The plot development holds up damn well.

3) SAVING PRIVATE RYAN (1998) [A]
It’s riveting and relentless. It’s groundbreaking and heartbreaking. Only a seasoned director with the passion of a thousand suns could pull off this tour de force. It’s an enormous achievement.

4) RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK (1981) [A-]
It’s a collaboration of giants. Spielberg and George Lucas hit all the right notes. It’s high-stylized filmmaking and adventure at its best. It will entrance you – its an instant classic.

5) CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND [1998 Director’s Cut] (1977) [A-]
After some fine tuning, Spielberg got the purest version of his vision. The film is massive but incredibly personal. It’s magical and hypnotic. It’s Spielberg’s baby.

6) MINORITY REPORT (2002) [A]
It’s a near-flawless film. Spielberg pushes the boundaries of sc-fi to create a modern classic. It hits all the right notes and does exactly what it set it out to do. It’s the best it can be.

7) E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL (1982) [A-]
I will be the first to call it a tad overrated. But damn if it isn’t Spielberg to the core. Sure it’s a little sappy and on a smaller scale, but it’s a classic if I ever saw one – emotional and powerful.

8) MUNICH (2005) [B+]
Spielberg is the king of historical drama and damn if I wasn’t transported to 1972 Germany. It’s a long film with a slow build. It’s the serious work of a professional.

9) DUEL [Theatrical Cut] (1971) [B+]
It’s a small masterpiece. Here’s another film that lives and thrives in its element. It achieves exactly what it set out to do. When we watch it, we know we’re in the presence of greatness.

10) CATCH ME IF YOU CAN (2002) [A-]
I’ll be damned if this isn’t excellent filmmaking. The cast delivers wonders and Spielberg nails the tone. It’s so enjoyable that he makes filmmaking look easy.

11) A.I. ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE (2001) [A-]
It’s sad, creepy, intelligent, stylized, and undeniably good. Spielberg’s tender nightmare is sometimes hard to watch but it is masterful. Plus, Teddy is awesome.

12) JURRASSIC PARK (1993) [B+]
It’s a superb, adventure romp. It’s imaginative and enduring. It’s a case where excellent source material meets classic Spielberg – a bravado effort in entertainment.

13) THE COLOR PURPLE (1985) [B+]
It’s heartbreaking from beginning to end. It’s uneven to be sure (Spielberg struggles with the comedy), but the emotional pull of the characters is magnetic. It’s a gem.

14) THE TERMINAL (2004) [B+]
A tad underrated, its Spielberg’s funniest film where the comedy works most consistently. There’s a ton of heart and laughs. Tom Hanks is wonderful.

15) INDIANA JONES AND THE LAST CRUSADE (1989) [B+]
It’s an actual Indy sequel. The personal elements make it memorable. The action scenes are breathtaking. It’s fairly even handed and quite entertaining.

16) WAR HORSE (2011) [B+]
The ending drags, but this is a fine film from a skilled director. It’s as good as the premise allows it to be. The emotion / characters are classic Spielberg. It’s lovely.

17) THE POLTERGEIST (1982) [Co-Director] [B+]
Legally, Spielberg wasn’t allowed to get credit for directing anything but E.T. in 1982. But in reality, the film is Spielberg’s direction, story, and vision. The film reaches a level of absurdity but it’s a thrilling and fascinating film nonetheless.

18) AMISTAD (1997) [B+]
The court scenes are misguided even if the acting is great. But this film is filled with great, intense sequences. It’s a powerful story come to life – thanks Djimon Hounsou.

19) WAR OF THE WORLDS (2005) [B+]
This film improved the most upon a second viewing. The characters lack significance – it’s a family survival story. But damn if Spielberg’s direction wasn’t tense, thrilling, moving, and exciting.

20) THE GOONIES [Story, Assistant Director] (1985) [B+]
Spielberg was on set quite a bit for his last story. This Spielberg / Richard Donner / Chris Columbus collaboration is a minor gem. It strolls along nicely until the third act.

21) THE ADVENTURES OF TINTIN (2011) [B+]
It’s a busy film that hits the ground running and doesn’t flesh out the protagonist. But damn if it isn’t a breathtaking achievement in animation.

22) HOOK (1991) [B+]
Its Spielberg’s most underrated film. It’s excellent up until Peter reaches Neverland, at which point it becomes an over-staged, high school production.

23) THE LOST WORLD: JURRASSIC PARK (1997) [B]
I love this film. Sure Vince Vaughn is misused and Jeff Goldblum phones it in, but it’s a rocking good time with adventure and cool cinematography.

24) THE SUGARLAND EXPRESS (1974) [B]
The story is not believable and the characters lack intelligence. But Goldie Hawn steals every scene and Spielberg tells the tale in an engaging way.

25) INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM (1984) [B]
The weak points are evident but it’s a fun adventure prequel. The dark and zany subject matter make it a unique ride. Plus Short Round is a joy – evil cults beware.

26) ALWAYS (1989) [B]
I was prepared to dislike this film but I couldn’t. Richard Dreyfuss is sappy towards the end but the comedy and chemistry between John Goodman and Holly Hunter carries the film.

27) 1941 [The 2.5 Hour Extended Cut] (1979) [B-]
Somewhere in this film is a fun, solid comedy. The film is enjoyable but a hot mess that tries to balance five story lines. Spielberg and Robert Zemeckis needed this flop so they could move onto better things.

28) EMPIRE OF THE SUN (1987) [B-]
It’s beautiful, moving, well acted by Christian Bale, but completely un-engaging. It has too much sun-starring and sentimental, crowd-watching for its own good.

29) THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL (2008) [B-]
It’s a let-down only because we are judging Spielberg/Lucas by the Spielberg/Lucas standard. It’s entertaining but the story and comedy are a mess.

30) TWILIGHT ZONE: THE MOVIE [B] (Segment 2: Kick the Can) [ C+] (1983)
Somehow, three lesser directors made better segments than Spielberg. His segment is overly sentimental and not scary at all. It’s the wrong thing at the wrong time.

Caleb S Garcia
December 28, 2011

Films of 2011

2011-12-26T10:04:00.000-08:00

This is an on-going list of all the films I see from 2011. I will update every month with new mini-reviews.

01) 01/20-- THE GREEN HORNET (Gondry) [C+]

Not so much a superhero film as Seth Rogan’s attempt at a high concept, high production value comedy. Michel Gondry stylizes with kung-fu fun and the supporting cast aids this odd ball, eye-candy capper.

02) 01/24-- NO STRINGS ATTACHED (Reitman) [C+]

The actors are great for the film’s formula yet their character are too one dimensional. The comedy is alright. The film is weighed down by emotion and heart yet never really succeeds in selling it. It’s enjoyable but nothing is really driving it.

03) 02/16-- THE EAGLE (Macdonald) [B-]

With fine direction to be sure, this well made and well acted (Channing Tatum etc.) period piece has a thin plot and loses steam in the third act with unrealistic plot twists and a lackluster execution. It mostly worked but was in one ear, and out the other.

04) 02/16-- JUST GO WITH IT (Dugan) [C+]

This film is a brave and oddly enjoyable niche Adam Sandler comedy that packs laughs along the way. The film fumbles with outrageous characters, likeable actors, and classic comedy source material.

05) 02/18-- I AM NUMBER FOUR (Caruso) [C+]

This film is a solid effort from people who work in TV (including some from Team Smallville). The film is a precursor; it’s a light version of a comic book teenager, with strange powers and a mysterious past, meets Glee. Michael Bay provides the FX power in an okay filler film.

06) 02/19-- UNKNOWN (Collet-Serra) [C+]

Liam Neeson can pack a punch but doesn’t have enough to work with in this cluttered, European thriller with a dime-a-dozen plot. It’s Borne-lite. It has quick editing, feisty fighting, but the cast is half awake and the writing lacks that self-aware charm.

07) 02/26-- ALL STAR SUPERMAN (Liu) [B]

Based on Grant Morrison’s well-crafted graphic novel, this direct-to-dvd animated film is Silver Age Superman at his best. The animation is fine, sleek, and the story is fan boy fun.

08) 03/03-- DRIVE ANGRY (Lussier) [C+]

Although the 3D is used in fun, Grindhouse fashion, this Nick Cage action romp is all concept with no heart and no depth. In an effort to spoof the hyperbolic extremities of day’s past, the Drive Angry team failed to make a good movie.

09) 03/03-- HALL PASS (Farrelly Bros.) [B-]

Surrounding the thoughtful message of the film is golden, comedic banter between Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis. These middle-aged characters cruise on low energy, but the famed comedy brothers pack enough outrageous situations to keep the beast rolling.

10) 03/09-- BEASTLY (Barnz) [D]

One of the worst films I’ve ever see. This retelling of Beauty and the Beast is a paper thin, brutal soap opera. The execution is poor, the acting is painful, and the characters are not believable. Although Neil Patrick Harris should have declined the supporting role, the upside to him co-starring is that the film at least had one likable character.

11) 03/09-- THE ADJUSTMENT BUREAU (Nolfi) [B-]

The Philip K. Dick plot is mostly there and mostly well done. It’s stylized, interesting, and filled with fine actors, but the story is like a lite version of The Matrix and not nearly as thought out. Sci-fi has to create rules and then follow them. The parts of sci-fi that don’t work tend to stick out more and hurt the overall product.

12) 03/09-- RANGO (Verbinski) [B+]

Rango may be the first CGI film done by Industrial Light and Magic, but it looks like they’ve been doing it for years- it’s a bravo debut. It’s a fun, sharp, delightful, satire-filled throwback to Westerns and the action does not stop. The voice cast is wonderful and the chase scenes are epic scaled. It doesn’t have the emotional pull of a Pixar champ, but it has everything else- I recommend this savvy gem.

13) 03/16-- RED RIDING HOOD (Hardwicke) [C+]

Amanda Seyfried is stunning; she’s a camera object, the first of the year. The backdrop is lush, the forest is haunting, and the villagers are mad. Unfortunately, everything else is mediocre soap. Gary Oldman is so bad it’s depressing. Like Twilight, this film is undeveloped potential.

14) 03/17-- MARS NEEDS MOMS (Wells) [B+]

This underrated gem uses mo-cap and quality CGI to tell an interesting, sci-fi, adventure story. The plot and characters are well defined and the setting is rad looking. The idea of a Martian matriarchy taking over the planet and subjugating the males to a wasteland is clever, thoughtful, and, most of all, bold. The film is a throw-back to 1980s Spielberg-era. And like those films, Mars packs an emotional punch, awe struck wonder, and plenty of laughs.

15) 03/23-- PAUL (Mottola) [B]

Paul is the less successful throw back to the ‘80s Spielberg. Simon Pegg and Nick Frost are likable, fun, and nail the first act, but the film gets lost in the middle by repetitiveness and pacing issues. The Seth Rogan-voiced alien is a fine enough gimmick and works once our heroes get past their drawn out disbelief. Luckily, the talented supporting cast keeps this baby afloat.

16) 03/23-- LIMITLESS (Burger) [B+]

Most of the loopholes and inconsistencies are forgivable in lieu of the superb directing and stylization of the film. Even if the story didn’t end up where I wanted it, Neil Burger takes the audience into a fascinating vision. Bradley Cooper is the perfect leading man, and the film has enough going on to keep the gimmick interesting. Robert De Niro is ok.

17) 03/30-- I AM (Shadyac) [C+]

Tom Shadyac is an interesting and sincere guy and I admire his documentary where he asks the big questions. The doc, however, is very elementary. He answers questions about the human condition without stepping on any toes. I applaud his push toward personal responsibility. The answer to “what’s wrong with the world” and to “what’s right with the world is the same,” I am.

18) 03/31-- SUCKER PUNCH (Snyder) [B+]

Emily Browning sways her hips. She moves, she stares, and we watch, captivated. She is the ideal camera object- she is everything the film could want. I’m a sucker for Zack Snyder’s punches. The director packs style, he is relentless, he is a visionary. The film is his baby. He takes these male created images of women and fills them with women who kick ass. Snyder is saluting and waving the white flag at the same time. The dialogue is corny, some of the characters are illogical and not likable, the action takes absurdity to a whole new level, and the ending is depressing – but I cannot look away.

19) 04/04-- WIN WIN (McCarthy) [B+]

Paul Giamatti is an indie force to be reckoned with. The film is a sweet and clever look at an odd, lovable family trying to do with right thing but getting into trouble. Thomas McCarthy packs heart and makes his characters complex with motivations- a feel good triumph.

20) 04/04-- JANE EYRE (Fukunaga) [B-]

The latest adaptation of the Charlotte Bronte novel looks great and features a fine cast. But the film has pacing issues, lacks a certain energy, and isn’t as creepy as it wants to be. It's great to see a pre-Magneto Michael Fassbender and a post-Alice Mia Wasikowska.

21) 04/06-- THE BIG YEAR (Frankle) [B-] – AS

Jack Black, Owen Wilson, and Steve Martin star in this very enjoyable and likeable dramady about competitive bird watching. The locations are gorgeous but the comedy struggles. The characters and a little plain and some of the dynamics are contrived.

22) 04/06-- SOURCE CODE (Jones) [B+]

Jack Gyllenhaal has leading-man chops in this superb sci-fi thriller about a man who keeps reliving a train ride in order to stop a bomber. The film is careful and well thought out. It’s confined and limits itself in an intelligent way. The ending is filled with implications that would be odd in a series but work decently for a one shot wonder.

23) 04/13-- YOUR HIGHNESS (Green) [B-]

Natalie Portman brings the right punch to this Danny McBride/James Franco comedy. The medieval gimmick is fun and the comedy is outlandish. I enjoyed it as a homage satire but it’s too thrown-together, too improvised, and too crude to be a comedy classic.

24) 04/13-- ARTHUR (Winer) [C+]

The Dudley Moore classic aside, this Russell Brand remake works in parts but becomes really tiring really fast. Brand is great in doses but the character is too wacky and too lazy for the audience to root for. It was a shell of a film.

25) 04/13-- HANNA (Wright) [B+]

Joe Wright has style. He directs the film as a fierce action thriller. The pace is relentless, the story is sharp, and the characters are well drawn. Saoirse Ronan delivers a chilling performance and proves to be a brilliant, perfectionist force to be reckoned with. Unfortunately, there are some missteps towards the end with the Hanna/father relationship. A little more closure in the final act and this superb film would have been even better.

26) 04/13-- THE LINCOLN LAWYER (Furman) [B]

Matthew McConaughey stars in this very solid, well done legal thriller. The film combines mystery, court drama, and interesting characters. It’s what you might expect from a Michael Connelly novel. Furman gets the tone right, he keeps a film with a lot of dialog moving with sly cuts.

27) 04/13-- SOUL SURFER (McNamara) [B-]

Based on real life, one-armed surfer Bethany Hamilton, Soul Surfer is a delightful, heartfelt, feel good story. It’s like a pleasant made-for-TV movie with the added benefit of an adorable AnnaSophia Robb and some splendid surf and location footage.

28) 04/19-- THE CONSPIRATOR (Redford, 2010) [B+]

[Note: This film had a 2010 film festival release but a 2011 theatrical release] Robert Redford directs a superb period piece about the court trails that follow President Lincoln’s assassination. James McAvoy and company give tour-de-force performances to a sharp script. Some of the supporting characters are a little too obvious but the look and attention to detail of this historical drama are great.

29) 04/20-- SCREAM 4 (Craven) [B-]

Wes Craven and Kevin Williamson reteam and do not disappoint. The problem with the latest Scream, however, is the focus on returning vet Neve Campbell. Newcomers Hayden Panettiere and Emma Roberts are great but misused / dispensable. The film slows in the middle and becomes repetitive, but the opening 20 minutes are horror-comedy genius. Thanks Anna Paquin.

30) 04/20-- RIO (Saldanha) [B+]

Rio is all kinds of enjoyable. It’s the perfect ending to a warm summer day. It’s like playing at the beach with your nephews and then piling into the living room for fun, energy spun entertainment. The film is well paced and colorful and has a ton of novelty. The voice cast lead by Jesse Eisenberg and George Lopez is magnificent. Rio is a good time, nuff said.

31) 04/24-- ATLAS SHRUGGED- PART 1 (Johansson) [C+]

The source material, Ayn Rand’s best seller, is interesting, provocative, and packed. Naturally, some of that translates onto the film. The characters are well drawn and the message keeps the plot interesting and moving. The film, however, is low budget and has a low production value. The execution is made-for-day time-TV amateur.

32) 04/24-- WATER FOR ELEPHANTS (Lawrence) [B+]

The look and atmosphere of this traveling circus period piece is wonderfully enchanting. Robert Pattison does a fine job opposite Reese Witherspoon but the Christoph Waltz character is too over-the-top villain and one dimensional. Aside from some contrived conflict, this romance drama is a pleasant journey.

33) 05/03-- CRISTIADA (Wright) [B+] – AS

This three hour plus movie is a fine depiction of a dramatic true story- the Mexican rebellion against a corrupt government that persecuted Catholics. Andy Garcia and the cast give fine performances but there are dramatic moments that are made silly by epic music and over-the-top dialogue. There are several short sequences that could be cut as well.

34) 05/04-- PROM (Nussbaum) [B-]

Disney’s Prom does a delightful job balancing several characters on their way to prom. The various plotlines keep the story moving but it’s the Aimme Teegarden’s Nova that anchors the film as the heart and soul of soapy, teen camp.

35) 05/04-- FAST FIVE (Lin) [B+]

Justin Lin resuscitates the Fast franchise with; get this, a story-driven feature. Diesel and Walker are joined by some buds to pull off an exciting heist. In addition to all the action, fighting, shooting, exploding, and really sweet driving, Dwayne Johnson gives the film a huge adrenaline boost.

36) 05/04-- MADEA'S BIG HAPPY FAMILY (Perry) [C+]

Tyler Perry’s latest offering is filled with great one-liners and some hilarious exchanges. This comedy, however, is weighed down by younger characters that are either over-the-top bitchy or sad parodies of themselves. Madea’s annoying speech and contrived plot devices don’t help either.

37) 05/04-- HOODWINKED TOO! HOOD VS. EVIL (Disa) [C+]

The humor is really mediocre in this lackluster sequel to a decent movie. The animation is ho-hum. It’s nice to have such a star studded voice cast, but Red herself is kind of a bitch. For every good character and voice (like Brad Garret), there's a lot of lame ones.

38) 05/06-- THOR (Branagh) [B]

Thor is mighty fun. The comedy is crisp, the action is fantastic, and Natalie Portman is a welcome pedigree. The plot, however, spends too much time on SHIELD and the Stellan Skarsgard character is too illogical which hurts the overall success of the film. But Kat Dennings is really cute/funny.

39) 05/18-- BRIDESMAIDS (Feig) [A-]

Writer/star Kristen Wiig delivers comedy gold with Bridesmaids. The beauty of the characters (all of which are wonderful) is that their distinct personalities create conflict. The banter between down-on-her-luck Wiig and Rose Byrne’s wealthy socialite is fantastic. Wiig can be a little over-the-top at times, with sequences that last too long, but she’s a superb, sympathetic character.

40) 05/18-- SOMETHING BORROWED (Greenfield) [C]

Kate Hudson has presence, Ginnifer Goodwin is sweet but nothing really works in this lackluster romantic comedy. It’s a drama of mediocre female fantasy. By the time the two people get together at the end, the audience couldn’t care less.

41) 05/18-- PRIEST (Stewart) [C+]

Scott Stewart does a fine job of stylizing this vampire-western. Priest is comic book coolness come to life. The characters, though, are too one-dimensional. Paul Bettany can’t act, but Maggie Q makes up for it. Its Book of Eli meets Underworld but not as good as either - great, visual tone though.

42) 05/23-- THE BEAVER (Foster) [B]

This is a deep, tragic, wonderful film. Mel Gibson gives an amazing performance, he is an A-. He’s a lost soul, a man deep in depression who becomes another person through a puppet. The gimmick is hard to work with. The film could have been an A- if it was a tad more fleshed out.

43) 05/25-- EVERYTHING MUST GO (Rush, 2010) [B-]

[Note: This film has a 2010 festival release but a 2011 theatrical release] This is a very interesting film in which virtually nothing happens. Will Ferrell is sympathetic and likable but the story has too many plot holes. It’s no wonder the film is based on a short story.

44) 05/25-- PIRATES / CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES (Marshall) [B-]

The latest Pirates installment is a step up. The first half is fun and adventure packed but the second half gets bogged down by too many story elements (i.e. the mermaids, the Spanish, the Fountain process). With Johnny Depp's classic character, less is a little bit more.

45) 05/29-- THE HANGOVER: PART II (Philips) [B]

Rather than being just a comedy, Part II is a dark, dramatic, and stylized journey through a madhouse (with comedy sprinkled all the way through). The Wolfpack finds their legs as they track through the chaos of Bangkok. More than watching a bromance comedy, we are watching a Todd Philips movie.

46) 05/29-- MIDNIGHT IN PARIS (Allen) [B+]

I have been enchanted by Woody Allen’s magic. This film took me by surprise. It was elegant, charming, the dialogue was wonderful, and it transported me into a unique world. Kudos to Owen Wilson who is clearly a director’s actor. And extra kudos to Cory Stoll’s Earnest Hemingway for being a pitch perfect character in Allen’s love letter to Paris nostalgia.

47) 05/29-- KUNG FU PANDA 2 (Nelson) [B]

This sequel pretty much does everything right. The animation is breathtaking, the characters are fun, and there’s enough of a plot. Po’s father steals the show as the most adorable, sympathetic character on the planet. Po, however, is a dumb ass. Rather than being a hopeful flop that makes an earnest effort, he constantly does the airhead thing at the wrong time and creates contrived conflict.

48) 06/03-- X-MEN: FIRST CLASS (Vaughn) [B+]

Director Vaughn delivers a rambunctious, adventure story with his X-Men prequel. James McAvoy gives a spot on performance in this action packed thrill ride. For my full review go here..

49) 06/08-- THE TREE OF LIFE (Malick) [B+]

Terrance Malick is an ambitious son-of-a-gun. He goes for majesty; he brings us to the edge of the universe (and our minds), to the creation of the world, and to dinosaurs. This is one part of the puzzle. The other part is a 1950s family with Brad Pitt and Jessica Chastin as parents who represent the ways of nature and grace. Their son struggles with this and says that they “always wrestle inside me.” The child also struggles with the death of his brother and essentially asks God how He could let this happen. This film is brilliant and beautiful but the story segments lack a certain flow and consistency. The family story is a sad one, filled with emotion and pain. There’s peace in the end but not much throughout the film.

50) 06/10-- SUPER 8 (Abrams) [B+]

In a loving tribute the Spielberg renaissance, JJ Abrams crafts a delightful and enchanting story about a group of kids who witness a train crash that releases a mysterious alien. The chemistry and the dialogue between the kids is spot on but there are loopholes and inconsistencies involving the alien and his odd behavior. But Elle Fanning is a young angel.

51) 06/15-- GREEN LANTERN: EMERALD KNIGHTS (Montgomery) [B+]

Martin Campell could learn a thing or two about directing a Green Lantern film from this direct to DVD animated film. The film has one poor segment that plays like an extended joke but the other segments, each of which chronicle the back story of a character, work wonderfully.

52) 06/19-- THE ART OF GETTING BY (Wiesen) [B-]

This film has a lot of potential. Freddie Highmore and Emma Roberts give fine performances as emo high schoolers playing the love game. There are, however, several inconsistencies that drag down the film (like how these teenagers keep drinking at bars). Overall, it’s a bravado effort of indie goodness to come.

53) 06/19-- JUDY MOODY AND THE NOT BUMMER SUMMER (Schultz) [C]

The Judy Moody gal is an adorable actress with a bright future ahead. The film, with all its summer zaniness and ADD high energy, is cute and fun but half way through it gets repetitive, dull, and silly. Sorry Heather Graham.

54) 06/19-- GREEN LANTERN (Campbell) [B-]

Green Lantern does a lot of things right: the suit, the CGI, Oa, the aliens, Ryan Reynolds, most of casting, this is all fine. The story is prototype, origin formula but doesn’t know how to ramp up the third act. Enough with the evil cloud villains, the sequel better redeem this one.

55) 06/22-- LANGUAGE OF A BROKEN HEART (Powell) [B+] – AS

When a sensitive New York writer gets dumped, he visits home to see his mom, best childhood friend, and meets a new gal pal. Although this sweet and delightful story stalls in the third act and lacks closure, the film is a bravado effort for writer/director/star Powell.

56) 06/23-- MR. POPPER’S PENGUINS (Waters) [C]

Director Mark Waters phones in this Jim Carrey vehicle about a divorced business man who inherits penguins from his father. Everything that is supposed to be cute and funny is lame, dumb and thoughtless. There are lots of plot holes and a lack of good ideas.

57) 06/24-- CARS 2 (Lasseter) [B+]

John Lasseter took everything that was bad about the first Cars and did the exact opposite for the sequel. The result is a high energy, high performance, spy adventure that features McQueen, Mater, and McMissile in exotic locations around the world. James Bond is having a moment and Mater had one too many moments in this entertaining film.

58) 06/29-- TRANSFORMERS: DARK OF THE MOON (Bay) [B-]

Michael Bay’s final installment is what part two should have been and part three rolled into one. There’s a ton of action and it’s very entertaining in that massive amounts of destruction kind of way. The humans, per-usual, are the weak link, but it’s worth it for that last 20 minutes. Maybe now Bay can go back to making more thoughtful films like The Island.

59) 06/29-- BAD TEACHER (Kasdan) [B-]

Jake Kasdan hit gold with Orange Country but missed the mark with Bad Teacher. The film, however, is a fine commentary about public education, social dynamics, and a woman on a mission. Cameron Diaz being an unlikable devil isn’t the problem so much as she’s just not enjoying herself. I love the advice she gives the boy: “8th grade isn’t your strong moment, don’t count on high school either.”

60) 07/07-- LARRY CROWNE (Hanks) [C+]

Gugu Mbatha-Raw plays a great part as Talia, the charming, flirty, high energy playette that takes a fatherly liking to Tom Hanks. Hanks enjoys the attention of Talia while romancing (with little effort) a drunken Julia Roberts. I like the actors but there are a lot of convenient contrivances in this loopy romantic comedy.

61) 07/07-- MONTE CARLO (Bezucha) [B-]

This is a film about the (middle school) female fantasy. It’s about average girls who play high society dress up and date princes in the name of charity. Having said that, the film isn’t that bad, it’s actually insightful. Selena Gomez is adorable and Leighton Meester makes a convincing turn as the stern older sister.

62) 07/13-- HORRRIBLE BOSSES (Gordon) [B-]

This film has several comedic, powerhouse actors. The whole plot is loopy but there’s enough twists and turns to pull off a witty and zany story. Jason Sudeikis is not convincing as a successful seducer and Jason Bateman holds back. But Charlie Day, Kevin Spacey, and Jaime Foxx are a welcome presence (plus Jennifer Aniston ain’t half bad as a psycho).

63) 07/13-- ZOOKEEPER (Coraci) [B-]

In this Kevin James vehicle, talking animals give advice to a zookeeper so he can win back his ex-girlfriend. The ex, of course, can’t be the one for him when Rosario Dawson is around (Clerks 2 anyone). This film has broad and enjoyable comedy and was the better version of Mr. Popper’s Penguins (thanks Sandler and co.).

64) 07/18-- HP / DEATHLY HALLOWS- PART 2 (Yates) [A-]

Harry Potter ends on an epic and glorious note. The final installment hits the ground running. It’s an action packed, wild ride. There are plenty of references to previous films so there’s lots of pay off- kudos to David Yates for mastering the tone of this dark installment (and to Albus’s bro for showing up!).

65) 07/18-- WINNIE THE POOH (Anderson / Hall) [B-]

It’s great to see the whole Winnie-the-Pooh gang back together. The characters are charming and fun and actually deliver some swell one liners (the not knot scene was great). This story is three short stories in one but instead of being a single, packed narrative the characters are left on the silly quest of finding Eeyore’s tail and Pooh’s annoying quest for honey.

66) 07/20-- BEGINNERS (Mills, 2010) [A-]

[Note: This film had a 2010 film festival release but a 2011 theatrical release] This is a superb, autobiographical film. Christopher Plummer gives a fine performance as a gay man who dies and Ewan McGregor gives a subtle, great performance. Ewan plays a low key character. He’s reflective and sensitive and responsible. He meets a girl and eventually there’s drama, but it isn’t that dramatic. There’s no yelling or fighting. The characters just talk about how they feel. Even when typical film scenarios arise, the scenes feel warm because we know the characters so well.

67) 07/23-- CEDAR RAPIDS (Arteta) [A-]

The worst thing about this film is that it got a small release. This film is hilarious. Ed Helms plays a small town, business type who goes to an out-of-state conference and meets the antics of John C. Reilly and Isiah Whitlock Jr. (he does a good Omar from the HBO show The Wire). There’s a tad too much drug humor with Helms but everything else works.

68) 07/23-- FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS (Gluck) [B-]

It’s better than No Strings Attached. JT and Mila Kunis have crazy, good chemistry (Kunis is insanely likeable). The film has a strong beginning, a solid middle, but gets caught up too much in rom com clichés by the end. The film is an enjoyable romp and very educational in the art of gaming and loving (and a great Shawn White cameo).

69) 07/23-- CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER (Johnston) [B]

Hayley Atwell is hot, but beyond that, this is a fine film. Chris Evans NAILS the role of Steve Rogers. The supporting cast does not disappoint either. This has been a fine year for Marvel films, and Cap sets up The Avengers perfectly. As a period piece, the film is exceptional. It captures the heart, soul, and fun of both WWII-era America and the joyous/noble spirit of 1940s comic books.

70) 07/30-- CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE (Ficarra/Requa) [B+]

I disliked the dramatic, graduation speech at the end and Emma Stone is a little young to be a convincing love interest for Ryan Gosling. Aside from that, this film does so much right. Steve Carrel is pitch perfect, the comedy is smart, Analeigh Tipton is ridiculously beautiful, and Gosling is a revelation, he’s a marvel. The film nails the hurt and pain of love. These characters have issues. But better then all of that is the enormous pay-off in the third act- it’s one of the best twists in a long time.

71) 07/30-- THE SMURFS (Gosnell) [C+]

This film could have been a lot worse. The set up is fine. The Smurfs are fun, enjoyable characters brought to life with a cool voice cast (George Lopez etc.). Neil Patrick Harris and Jayma Mays are fine human compliments. As predicted, the comedy is silly with lots of broad comedy. Its Scooby-Doo meets The Three Stooges: cute with cotton-candy humor.

72) 07/31-- COWBOYS & ALIENS (Favreau) [B]

It’s an interesting film. It’s very serious, more than Tombstone. The plot is deep with a complex story but raises a similar question to Tron: Legacy: So what the heck is Olivia Wilde? Daniel Craig does a better job than old man Harrison Ford, and Sam Rockwell rounds out the cast well. But for all the action in the story, the film is somewhat dull. It moves but it also stalls and pines too much. It’s missing that flare.

73) 08/07-- RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (Wyatt) [B+]

The worst thing about this film is the title. Rise of the Apes, as I call it, is a smart and well developed thriller. Although it’s a prequel set in modern times, Rise only uses the POTA concept, in many ways it’s a stand-alone adventure. It’s important to remember that this is science fiction and that the fictional elements of the story build and build. Although suspension of disbelief is required, the film does a good job of playing by its own rules. The film belongs to Cesar, the sympathetic leader of the ape uprising, while James Franco, John Lithgow, and Indian beauty Frieda Pinto give fine supporting performances.

74) 08/07-- THE CHANGE-UP (Dobkin) [C+]

It’s like Freaky Friday meets The Hangover except not as good as either. While Ryan Reynolds and Jason Bateman are fine comedians, Reynolds takes a back seat while Bateman shows real range. There are amusing antics in this body swap comedy, Olivia Wilde makes a fine appearance, but the last act forces a message, and relies too much on R rated, crude humor. This is not Reynold’s summer, while Bateman does more here than in Horrible Bosses.

75) 08/13-- 30 MINUTES OR LESS (Fleischer) [B+]

This is a packed comedy with great pacing. Jessie Eisenberg lends his rapid fire, comedic chops as a pizza delivery guy who has to rob a bank or die. Aziz Ansari (TV’s Parks and Rec.) matches Eisenberg beat for beat and even has a hot, Indian sister (they’re having a moment). And if that wasn’t enough, Danny McBride and Nick Swardson take advantage on the R rating with superb, witty banter. It’s an odd ball comedy with heart, and a boost of 5-hour energy.

76) 08/13-- THE HELP (Taylor) [A-]

It’s the first (real) Oscar contender of the year. The Help is a marvelous, moving, and tender film about black maids during the Civil Rights era (in the South) and the white ladies that employ them. Discussing his upcoming friend-with-cancer film 50/50, Seth Rogan said that anyone can make a sad film about cancer, the trick is to make it light hearted and moving. The same is true for the tough subject matter in The Help. There are plenty of dramatic and watery eye scenes, but the three dimensional characters have a lot of depth and heart and light, comedic joy in their step. Viola Davis, in particular, gives a stirring, reach-for-the-tissues, performance, while everyone else (Emma Stone, Octavia Spencer, Bryce Dallas Howard, and Jessica Chastain) delivers their A game as well. Dare I say that The Help succeeded in doing what Steven Spielberg tried to do in The Color Purple? I dare.

77) 08/20-- FRIGHT NIGHT (Gillespie) [C+]

I have nothing against a 1980s remake, but I couldn’t get into this film. Maybe it was the dull Nevada suburb that the story takes place in, maybe it was McLovin and other mediocre characters, or all the night time 3D, but outside of a splendid Colin Farrell performance and some top notch fight scenes, Fright Night was uninspiring and as dull as a Nevada suburb.

78) 08/20-- CONAN THE BARBARIAN (Nispel) [B-]

Like Transformers, the new Conan is a very enjoyable watching experience. For the top notch, high energy, get-you-revved-up action alone, I give Conan the benefit of the doubt and grade it a mark above Fright Night. This film is more faithful to the original stories. It’s like 300 done by the director of The Scorpion King. Conan kicks major ass, defeats the villain, bangs the girl, goes on a long journey, and delivers an inspiring message: “no man should live in chains.”

79) 08/20-- ONE DAY (Lone Scherfig) [C-]

From what I understand, the book is much better than the film. It’s hard to point out what was so lackluster about this Europe-set love story that revisits the boy and girl every year for 20 years. Anne Hathaway plays a wussy girl that has all the disadvantages of being a nerdy, insecure, shy book worm with none of the advantages. Jim Sturgess is one-dimensional, half awake, and has all these addictive habits for no reason. Plus the film is really slow, lacking in energy, and lacking in fun. Come on its love, there should be highs with the lows. Instead we get two characters that like each other but can never be together and then when they finally get together one of them dies. It has all the disadvantages of a Shakespearean tragedy with none of the advantages. Come on Catwoman, you can do better than that.

80) 08/29-- OUR IDIOT BROTHER (Peretz) [B+]

Damn this is a pleasant surprise. Paul Rudd (who can really act) and Rashida Jones rekindle their magic from I Love You, Man in this new, heart-felt comedy. Ned may be a free spirited, oblivious hippie who gets in trouble for weed but he’s not as screwed up as his three sisters. This film packs an excellent supporting cast (8 fine comedians) and deals with the pain of struggling through life with a lot of heart and sensitivity. It will make you laugh, think, feel, sympathize, and Willie Nelson will have you misty eyed.

81) 08/29-- SPY KIDS: ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD (Rodriguez) [C+]

In the latest installment of the Spy Kids franchise, there’s a new family (and new kids) on the loose. The kids are alright, and Robert Rodriguez delivers plenty of low brow humor to entertain the really young ones. The humor is the worst part, Rodriguez, however, is a master of visuals. The spy scenes, the gadgets, the adventures are filled with fun, CGI zaniness. And the time travel, time pausing, slow aging, plot line is more complex than Inception and as tragic as Watchmen. I’m glad Jeremy Piven was there, and I’m glad Jessica Alba is still hot.

82) 08/30-- TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT (Dowse) [B-]

I recently watched this March release on Red Box. I figured that a film completed in 2007 could wait a few more months. At any rate, this film is a feel-good comedy that packs plenty of laughs. Like the film, the main cast is good not great. Topher Grace is nice guy who is clueless, Anna Ferris is reserved and underused (remember her awesome turn in Observe and Report?) and the supporting cast gets the job done. The film is entertaining, enjoyable, and not terribly deep. We get the message (lying is bad, beeeee yourself) and enjoy the often-nailed ‘80s nostalgia. It’s odd that this is an R rated film because aside from the cocaine snorting, there was more edge in Sixteen Candles.

83) 09/03-- SHARK NIGHT 3D (Ellis) [C+]

Shark Night has production value. It’s a crisp film, it’s polished. The story is a standard, horror set up where several good looking teenagers visit a lake house and are attacked by various sharks. The evil guys are vicious and the deaths are gory. Half the violence is gritty fun, but most of it is a shock value, scare fest with silly, throw-away action aplenty.

84) 09/03-- COLOMBIANA (Megaton) [B-]

I really enjoyed the high energy fun of Colombiana. Zoe Saldana is the film. She’s riveting to watch the entire time, weather she’s stumbling out of her corvette pretending to be drunk, scaling the jail vents in black latex, or blanketing bad guys with bullets. Saldana is all three of Charlie’s Angeles in one. The film isn’t Luc Besson’s best script, but it features his signature femme fatale. Saldana is great and the rest of the film is close to being great (the closer where dogs attack was corn ball silly).

85) 09/03-- DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK (Nixey) [C+]

In a film with Guy Pierce, Katie Holmes, and Bailee Madison, Pierce is the weakest link. These three people move into a manor haunted by goblin like creatures that live in an unkempt basement. I felt bad for Holmes, her fate is sad. The problem with this film is that the characters are really dumb and Pierce takes the see-it-to-believe-it ideology to the extreme. But keep your eye on Bailee Madison (Just Go With It), she is a gifted young actress with the talent of a Fanning.

86) 09/03-- THE DEBT (Madden) [B]

Most of The Debt works- the flashbacks work better than the modern day story. With a talented cast (this is Jessica Chastain’s year); the film nails the authenticity of East Berlin in 1966. Although the plot builds in suspenseful fashion as three agents track down and capture a Nazi war criminal, I was surprised to see the period story stop there (such a brief tale). Flash to present day and Helen Mirren has the ridiculous task of hunting down the aged criminal yet again.

87) 09/09-- WARRIOR (O’Connor) [B+]

The idea of two brothers who haven’t spoken in years competing against each in a mixed martial arts tournament could have been executed poorly in lesser hands. Tom Hardy and John Edgerton are rising talents that give a solid performance but its Nick Nolte as the washed up father looking for redemption that anchors the film and makes it tug at the heart strings. It’s The Fighter’s low key brother.

88) 09/09-- CONTAGION (Soderbergh) [B+]

Steven Soderbergh knows what he’s doing. He creates suspense and intrigue while keeping the story light enough to enjoy. Contagion works because it doesn’t take itself too seriously. It’s about a disease that quickly spreads throughout the world and how society unravels because of it. And in this survival tale, all the characters make sense to the plot; Laurence Fishburne and Kate Winslet lead a team of disease researchers. But I still don’t understand why Matt Damon was immune.

89) 09/17-- THE LION KING 3D (Allers/Minkoff) [A-]

Re-released in 3D (no surcharge for a hopper like me), The Lion King is a wonderful and elegant film. I listened to the criticism about Simba and his lack of heroic qualities but I’m fine with him. The fact that Simba doesn’t want to embrace his status or who he is makes sense and doesn’t detract from the tightly paced 87 minute film. The key to Simba’s behavior is Scar. Simba experienced a traumatic event and blamed himself for Mufasa’s death. So Simba fled into exile too ashamed and afraid to return- it’s Hamlet meets The Book of Psalms over here. If I’m splitting hairs over a Disney film, I would question why the hyenas are personified but the elephants and rhinos are not. Where’s the back up for the lions?

90) 09/17-- STRAW DOGS (Lurie) [B-]

Straw Dogs is well directed and well cast but has one major problem: all the characters are dumb pieces of shit. I know this is typical for a thriller / horror film, but this film tries to be serious and then becomes insanely frustrating. The original had edgy subject matter and is probably a far better film. The new film did not convey why Kate Bosworth gets raped and doesn’t tell James Marsden about it. FAIL FAIL FAIL. Just like Friends With Benefits, it’s a case of contrived conflict where the man overreacts a little and the woman overreacts A LOT. You’re killing me Lois.

91) 09/18-- DRIVE (Refn) [A-]

Drive is all about style, and it overflows with it (pink cursive and all). From Danish director Nicolas Winding Refn, the film is a gritty, noir tale with a wild bunch of characters and not a bad actor in the bunch. Ryan Gosling says less than two pages of dialogue the whole time. The man has presence. He’s a loner, he cruises the streets of LA at night. He works in a body shop, does stunt driving, and drives a getaway car. It’s inspiring to see a character so content with being alone. He fills his day with what he likes; he hones his craft. When he gets mixed up with the wrong crowd, he becomes a brutal man of vengeance. Having Christina Hendricks in the movie doesn’t hurt either.

92) 09/18-- I DON’T KNOW HOW SHE DOES IT (McGrath) [C+]

I don’t know how a movie with a stellar cast and a talented screenwriter can be so mediocre. Writer Aline Brosh McKenna’s latest offering is a far cry from her Devil Wears Prada glory days. Sarah Jessica Parks runs around with frazzled hair as a working mother with a lot to do. She breaks the fourth wall with witty observations (sound familiar), and the supporting cast (some funnier than others) do the same. The film relies on easy gags and typical story elements. I appreciate the gender twist but not much more- although Christina Hendricks and Olivia Munn both bring the pretty.

93) 09/23-- MONEYBALL (Miller) [B+]

Moneyball is a fantastic film about the GM of the Oakland A’s and his struggle to win games on a very low budget. Although I’m not interested in baseball, this film captivated me the whole way through. We can thank the skills of Brad Pitt, Jonah Hill and other players for that. We can also thank Aaron Sorkin for co-writing a very interesting script that mellows out his usual dialogue. Moneyball is reflective and moody. The characters soak in the scene which causes the film to slow a bit. Also, the hand held camera shots hurt more than they help. But I loved Peter, his prodigy-like mind, and his love for the game.

94) 09/23-- ABDUCTION (Singleton) [C+]

Abduction has production value and a decent supporting cast of Alfred Molina and Sigourney Weaver. Taylor Lautner puts the ab in abduction. He gets the job done. The tween gals can spend half their time ogling and the other half relating to Phil Collin’s daughter. The plot is by the numbers. Boy’s adoptive parents are killed, men chase boy, boys drags along girl for no reason. It’s a sunny and happy film, more than it needs to be. It’s also repetitive, dull, and lacks depth.

95) 09/23-- KILLER ELITE (McKendry) [C+]

The only difference between Killer Elite and Abduction is that Killer Elite is rated R. Killer Elite is Abduction for action-loving adults. Jason Statham, Clive Owen, and Robert De Niro attract the crowd and the fights between Statham and Owen are cool, mindless fun. I have no idea what the story was about- some old Arab guy is mad because Statham and friends may have killed his sons. Owen is hunting Statham but has gone rouge. The action is so over the top and crazy that the story serves little purpose. At least the story attempted and achieved a certain depth.

96) 09/30-- 50/50 (Levine) [B]

50/50 has a lot of heart and warmth. The characters are three dimensional and real; it’s a great example of talented actors meet true story. Joseph Gordon-Levitt does a fine job as Adam who gets cancer and has his life turned upside down. Anna Kendrick reminds us of the stages that Adam goes through. The film nails the tone. It’s not something you’ll watch a lot, but you’ll watch it when you need a sentimental film that’s uplifting without being “feel good.”

97) 09/30-- WHAT’S YOUE NUMBER? (Mylod) [C+]

This film gives a solid effort. Ultimately, it has way too many rom-com clichés but it’s enjoyable nonetheless. You’ll be amused without laughing out loud. It’s hard to not like Anna Ferris, she’s adorable, manic, and brings plenty of energy to the part. She has the unique challenge of carrying the film. She just likes to overreact in this toned down version of Friends With Benefits. Chris Even proves to be a fun guy with comedic chops. Between Green Lantern and Captain America, I’d much rather hang out with the Captain.

98) 10/07-- IDES OF MARCH (Clooney) [B+]

This is a very solid film from director George Clooney. The characters are well written and well acted. I was intrigued by Ryan Gosling and how he handled the stress of the campaign. I liked seeing Clooney as a Presidential candidate and how different he was in his private life. Unfortunately, the side story with Rachael Evan Wood getting pregnant took center stage and became a huge part of the film. She was interesting but not as interesting as the other characters.

99) 10/07-- REAL STEEL (Levy) [B+]

This film is executive produced by Spielberg and Zemeckis and is (rightfully) described as a stand-up-and-cheer film. The film has a lot of heart. The relationship between Hugh Jackman, the girlfriend, and the son is compelling even if the circumstances that get them all together lack believability. Kids will love this film and adults will enjoy it too if they can ignore the occasional silliness.

100) 10/14-- FOOTLOOSE (Brewer) [B]

The new Footloose hits the ground running. It’s a solid film, with fine acting, and smooth directing. The music is upbeat and hip, and the dance numbers are exceptional. It’s a feel-good film that can’t really be compared to the ‘80s charm of the Kevin Bacon original. It’s not amazing but its decent all around. Ren’s uncle makes for a superb character.

101) 10/14-- THE THING (Van Heijningen) [B-]

I’m lacking in the adjective department but this is a decent film. It’s kind of in one ear and out the other. Mary Elizabeth Winstead is great as the lone female. The film is suspenseful and creepy as each character gets killed off one by one. The snowy tundra is well shot. I liked the CGI monster. Some prefer old school make up but this film took advantage of the latest technology and did something different.

102) 10/27-- THE THREE MUSKETEERS (Anderson) [C]

This is a really mediocre film. I wanted to like it more. I liked the cast and the set design. The film had money. There were quality action scenes and special effect shots. But the writing was horrible. The dialogue was silly and all the characters were overdone. It’s not believable that D’Artagnan could be that cocky and live to tell about it.

103) 10/27-- TAKE SHELTER (Nichols) [A-]

This is a quality film about a man (Michal Shannon) who predicts the coming of a mega storm and obsesses over preparing for it. The film is minimalism at its best. The plot unfolds in a mellow way and keeps the viewer captivated. Shannon makes a complex performance look simple. This film is a minor gem and congrats to Jessica Chastain for making more good films in one year than many actresses make in a decade.

104) 10/30-- PUSS IN BOOTS (Miller) [B-]

The character of Puss in Boots (voiced by Antonio Banderas) is greater than the Puss in Boots story. The story is essentially Jack and the Beanstalk plus a back story of friendship and betrayal with Humpty Dumpty. This is all fun and fine but it doesn’t carry a story the way Shrek does. The animation is gorgeous and I love a film in IMAX 3D but it needs to have a little more depth.

105) 10/30-- THE RUM DIARY (Robinson) [C+]

I wanted to like this film more. Johnny Depp does a fine job as (essentially) Hunter S. Thompson and there’s a decent supporting cast. But the film is dull. It has pacing issues and moves along with a pseudo-documentary style (it’s not shaky cam but it’s hand-held). The film might have been better if it was more “stream of consciousness.” But instead it’s a lot of running around, getting arrested, fighting with locals, taking drugs, and typing up stories with Amber Heard in the background.

106) 10/30-- IN TIME (Niccol) [B-]

I saw In Time for two reasons: Amanda Seyfried. In Jennifer’s Body, people went for Megan Fox but stayed for Seyfried- the same is true here. I love her short, gothic hair, her black, punk dress, complete with long gloves and heels. She is wonderful to look at. The film has a great supporting cast and a wonderful concept. The execution could have been great which made it all the more disappointing when it was only okay. There are lots of loop holes and lots of contrived drama. But I do love director Andrew Niccol and I appreciate what he was trying to do. Just don’t ask me to buy a 35 year old actor as 25.

107) 11/02-- ATTACK THE BLOCK (Cornish) [B]

I saw this on DVD. It’s an independent, British, sci-fi, horror, comedy. It took this American about 30 minutes to get into the film. The plot is basic but the film excels at having natural, free-flowing dialogue between the characters. Said characters are rough around the edges; they are rude and crude but ultimately well defined. Attack the Block is a small, character pleasure.

108) 11/05-- SANCTUM (Grierson) [B-]

Another Red Box DVD, Sanctum is lush and gorgeous and pretty to look at. The director makes fine use of James Cameron’s Avatar cameras, and the actors are satisfactory. The film takes a successful survival story and adds all sorts of complications and sad endings. I’m all for plot conflict, but this conflict was too contrived and not believable (people go crazy too fast).

109) 11/06-- TOWER HESIT (Ratner) [B]

Brett Ratner directs an all star cast in an enjoyable film that no one needs to be embarrassed about. Ben Stiller is reserved, Eddie Murphy is a seasoned character actor, Matthew Broderick does a fine job, and Alan Alda makes a good villain. There are flaws to be sure (the third act wraps up too nicely). The film isn’t as good as Ocean’s Eleven, but there’s always something fun happening.

110) 11/06-- HAROLD AND KUMAR 3D X-MAS (Strauss-Schulson) [B]

It was a pleasant surprise. The film takes place in a single night and is delivered as a stream of consciousness. While this limits the film and the development of the characters, it’s also the thing that gives the film style. We see Harold and Kumar adapt to crazy situations and act bad ass in their own survivalist way. Plus the NPH cameo has never been better and more self aware.

111) 11/06-- JOHNNY ENGLISH REBORN (Parker) [C+]

Rowan Atkinson is great at physical comedy. In one chase scene, the villain climbs a chain-link fence while Johnny opens the door and follows. Johnny’s ability to outsmart is frequently balanced by his absent-minded mishaps throughout the film. The latter is overkill. Atkinson is gifted but can’t escape the silly, edgeless humor and uninteresting plot.

112) 11/17-- J. EDGAR (Eastwood) [A-]

I was thoroughly impressed by this film. Clint Eastwood crafts a fine period piece. Yes the film is dialog heavy and may be boring at times, but Leo DiCaprio creates a Mr. Hoover that is entrancing and fascinating. Hoover was an odd guy. But he was driven and determined. He may have turned off some people but he accomplished much and left a legacy. The homo-social relationship at the end was over emphasized and slowed down the film, but overall the film covers a lot of ground.

113) 11/17-- MARTHA MARCY MAY MARLENE (Durkin) [B+]

Elizabeth Olsen is breathtaking to watch. Her beauty fills and entrances a room. It’s easy to love Martha. Even though the character was brainwashed into a cult, involved in crime, and socially difficult for her sister, we believe her struggle and like her nonetheless. But two-thirds into the film, Martha is still being secretive, not communicating her problems, and in denial about the help she needs. The last act of this film needed to move faster. Plus the uncertain ending was memorable but unfulfilling.

114) 11/17-- MARGIN CALL (Chandor) [A-]

Margin Call is a tour de force. It’s the 12 Angry Men of this generation. Everyone in the all star cast is 100 percent believable and delivers a fine performance. The film takes place in one night and is riveting the entire time. It’s about a company that is about to go under and the stress and suspense of the situation is real and moving as the story builds and builds. It’s dialog heavy but its solid work.

115) 11/21-- BREAKING DAWN – PART 1 (Condon) [C]

Aside from some musical montages and brief moments of comedy, director Bill Condon has no style whatsoever. Condon can direct serious movies but here he was just crippled. Most of the drama wasn’t believable. Bella is a bad communicator and Edward is not interesting. Jacob was the biggest improvement. Plot points are unexplained. Why didn’t Bella drink vampire blood before the conversion, how did she get pregnant, why didn’t the Cullens have reinforcements so the doctor vampire could be there with Bella? This is the end; we need to step it up.

116) 11/21-- IMMORTALS (Singh) [B-]

I’ll be nice and say that half of the film was great and the other half was mediocre at best. To no surprise, the good stuff was the “immortal” stuff. When Zeus, Poseidon, and other gods wreck havoc on earth and fight their battles, it is slow-motion, 3D, graphic violence awesomeness. Henry Cavill is good but the character needs a bigger world and a bigger quest to go on. At least Frieda Pinto is hot.

117) 11/21-- HAPPY FEET TWO (Miller) [B+]

I haven’t seen the original Oscar winner, but this sequel was a pleasant surprise. The plot is basic but the characters and humor are relentless, and the music is really enjoyable. George Miller tells an emotional story with likable players and everything looks gorgeous and beautiful. It’s a penguin sitcom on crack. If Tintin doesn’t win the Best Animated Feature Oscar, then Happy Feet Two has a good chance.

118) 11/23-- THE DESCENDENTS (Payne) [B+]

I wanted to like this film more. It’s a well done and well made film to be sure. George Clooney and Shailene Woodley are fantastic. But it’s too sad. It’s a film about a woman being taken off life-support and dying. The sadness is too easy. Then to balance out the sadness, the characters have unconvincing outbursts and say inappropriate things in almost every scene. I didn’t believe the characters (aside from Clooney) until the end. And Clooney plays a jerk. He’s an obsessive, angry person. The director could have packaged the film much better. It’s an objective B+ for a film that I have no desire to watch again.

119) 11/23-- LIKE CRAZY (Doremus) [B]

This film moves well and covers a lot. It’s also emo, reflective, and somber which I can only take so much of. If I liked the characters more and believed in their drama, then I could handle more sadness. But I don’t care. I’m not invested enough. The characters are passive-aggressive and are dramatic for the sake of being dramatic. It’s a wonderful, early step for the director and a solid job by the actors.

120) 11/23-- MY WEEK WITH MARILYN (Curtis) [B]

This film is half way there. There are no big faults that stand out; it’s more of a missed opportunity. The film could have been bigger and tackled bigger issues in a more encompassing story. Michelle Williams is fantastic as Marilyn Monroe. She understands the woman and shows us her vulnerability and hypnotic presence. I don’t care about Colin, he’s not interesting. Monroe was on a self-destructive path. She was loved by all yet lonely and insecure. I wanted more Monroe.

121) 11/25-- HUGO (Scorsese) [B+]

Martin Scorsese crafts a magical and elegant film. Hugo is not what I expected. The two lead children and the universe they inhabit are wonderful. It’s a fine journey and a love letter to the silent era of film. Having said that, the film has small flaws and loose ends. Why does Ben Kingsley freak out so much? How did he program the android to draw the picture? Why didn’t Christopher Lee and Jude Law tie into the story more? Stuff like that.

122) 11/25-- THE MUPPETS (Bobin) [B+]

The first 20 minutes of the new Muppet movie are the best. Jason Segal hits the ground running with witty humor and laughs. My main issue, despite my love for Segal and Amy Adams, is that the Muppets are not the main characters, they don’t drive the story. New muppet Walter is given too much screen time and slows the film. I’d rather see Kermit return to his water hole roots and less of Miss Piggy. The film is a remake-sequel and needs more of a plot.

123) 11/26-- BATMAN: YEAR ONE (Liu/Montgomery) [B]

This PG-13 animated film is adapted from the Frank Miller graphic novel which was one of the stories that Batman Begins is based on. This gritty and well drawn version is Jim Gordon-centric and Selena Kyle is a major player. Rather than retreading Bruce Wayne’s origin, we get to see the supporting characters play an extended role. It’s more like “Gotham: Year One.”

124) 12/12-- MELANCHOLIA (Von Trier) [B-]

It’s overrated. The first half was about a melodramatic wedding that made no sense. The second half plays much better because Kirsten Dunst is great at being depressed. The hand-held filming was annoying but the end destruction scene was gorgeous. It’s a very dividing film.

125) 12/12-- NEW YEAR’S EVE (Marshall) [C+]

Not all the actors are bad – about half of them work (Ashton Kutcher and Lea Michele have fine chemistry) – but little is thought out in this star studded romp. It’s a bunch of random stories thrown together.

126) 12/18-- M: I – GHOST PROTOCOL (Bird) [A-]

Brad Bird proves that he is just as good with live action as he is with animation. This is the surprise thrill ride of the year. Tom Cruise and company hit all the right notes. It’s constant action – it’s a rocking good time.

127) 12/19-- YOUNG ADULT (Reitman) [A-]

All Reitman/Cody collaborations get the benefit of the doubt. As a narrative, this depression story worked much better than Melancholia (how could it not). I wanted a narration with my Charlize Theron – we begin to see why she is depressed and it all starts to make sense. Her performance is great and the character is more redemptive than people say.

128) 12/19-- SHERLOCK HOLMES: A GAME OF SHADOWS (Richie) [B]

The original is a hair better but this is pretty equal. It’s like Guy Richie and company never left the set. Sherlock is back on the case and there are plenty of thrills, mysteries, comedy, and action scenes to go around. I didn’t need the second death but it’s all good.

129) 12/21-- THE ADVENTURES OF TINTIN (Spielberg) [B+]

The animation is beautiful and some of the sequences (like grab the hawk) are revolutionary. The narrative needs work. It begins too quickly and doesn’t flesh out the protagonist. This film might get worse with age but for now it’s an impressive achievement.

130) 12/21-- THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO (Fincher) [A-]

David Fincher knows what’s up. He teamed up with the writer of Schindler’s List (Steve Zaillian) to adapt a very popular novel. Fincher’s style is all over this film. It’s raw, scary, and thrilling and Rooney Mara does an Oscar worthy job.

131) 12/23-- THE ARTIST (Hazanavicius) [A-]

The film is phenomenal. It’s really well done but it’s limiting – and the story is simple. The style is great but familiar. It’s impressive to see what can be done with such basic technology. The scene where the guy hears sound in a dream is one of the coolest scenes ever.

132) 12/23-- WE BOUGHT A ZOO (Crowe) [B-]

It’s a family film. It’s enjoyable and feel-good but corny. Crowe has done better; he was probably just looking for work. Matt Damon has talent and it’s great to see Elle Fanning in a different role.

132) 12/25-- TINKER TAILOR SOLIDER SPY (Alfredson) [B+]

It’s a great movie, well made and well acted to be sure, but it’s really slow. There’s a lot of talking and a lot of people who stand around and act serious. I wanted more excitement. The film lacks energy. Gary Oldman is great but a little one note.

133) 12/26-- WAR HORSE (Spielberg) [B+]

Spielberg knows how to bring the goods. It’s a powerful film; I’m not going to lie. The horse is only so great but the supporting characters are all brought to interesting life. The PG-13 limits the film as it jumps between war drama and human comedy.

134) 12/31-- GNOMEO AND JULIET (Asbury) [B]

It's much better than I thought it would be. It's a fun, enjoyable little film. Voice actors like James McAvoy, Emily Blunt, and Michael Cain do a fine job. It's a zany, silly story but the animation is cool and so is the Elton John music.

Caleb S Garcia
Jan. - May 2011

VC #2: Imitation

2011-10-12T21:51:00.000-07:00

When I was younger, I spent many a summer, and many a non-summer, watching many a cartoon (I guess old habits die hard). I admired these cartoons and wanted emulate the characters (hey, there are worse scenarios). When I was 11, I became particularly enamored with a Disney show called "Quack Pack" which featured teenage versions of Huey, Dewey, and Louie and their uncle, Donald Duck (I admit that "Duck Tales" remains superior). Since blue was (and is) my favorite color, I favored Dewey for his choice of hue (his mellow and intellectual personality was also agreeable). In the Spring of 2000, before my sixth-grade year book photo, I visited the Salvation Army and picked up a blue shirt and light blue button-down and began dressing like Dewey. After sixth grade at A.E. Wright Middle School, I had the unfortunate pleasure of attending summer school at Lindero Canyon Middle School (yes, I was socially awkward, media addicted, and scholastically challenged). During that summer, I dressed in my blue outfit (probably) four times a week. I remember walking to my dad's place (he lived near the school) on the days I stayed with him. It's possible that I'm wrong about all my dates. But that is past as I remember it. Although the summers were boring, and TV with my step-brother was more miss than hit, childhood has a way of remaining warm and fuzzy.

Caleb S Garcia

October 12, 2001

People Like Raymond

2011-10-10T15:54:00.000-07:00

Everybody Loves Raymond works because the people involved work. A multitude of individuals and production companies came together and made nine years of great television. From 1996 to 2005, Ray Barone and his crazy family proved that a large demographic of viewers did indeed love Raymond. (Friend) Brian Golden called the show "People Like Raymond," and considering the double meaning of the title, people who are like Raymond indeed like Raymond. I am like Raymond. I’m a mellow, boyish, writer type with delusions of creativity, and jokes where I’m not the sole laugher. I love my family and need a strong woman who has all of the pants-wearing advantages of Debra with none of the emotional, bitch-fest disadvantages.

Raymond was created by Philip Rosenthal and co-created by Ray Romano. Four companies brought the show to life including Rosenthal’s Where’s Lunch?, HBO (who owns the show), Worldwide Pants (owned by David Letterman), and CBS (which had distribution rights). Raymond was filmed at Warner Bros. Studios but aired on CBS. The producers were no amateurs to comedy. HBO created the acclaimed comedy Sex and the City (which overlapped Raymond from 1998 to 2004), and Raymond is second in success only to Letterman’s Late Show as a WWP production. And look at the cast. Doris Roberts (Marie) has been in TV and film since the 1960s, and Peter Boyle (Frank) stole scenes in Young Frankenstein (1974), Taxi Driver (1976), and That Darn Cat (1997). Brad Garret (Robert) was a stand-up vet, and Patricia Heaton (Debra) was on three failed sitcoms before the relative newcomers joined the show and brought the funny. But the heart of show is the every man with the comedic timing. Ray Barone (Romano) may be the vanilla hero whose central job is reaction but what a great, blank slate protagonist to have. And that, my friends, is how you become one of the most successful shows in TV history and, as far as sitcoms go, my personal favorite.

The characters work because they are comfortable with each other. Robert is the older brother and has no qualms about telling Ray to stop complaining about the “ideal life.” Much of Robert’s teasing and bluntness steams from jealousy and invested interest. Ray is typically deserving of the playful banter and dishes it right back. The premise of the Barone family is that Marie smothered Ray and neglected Robert. Frank, meanwhile, short changed everyone in the affection department. Debra feels comfortable enough with Ray to constantly bark at him, but Marie is there to keep Debra in her bad-cooking place. As the two females, Debra and Marie often put aside their differences and ban together (even more so when Amy enters the picture). Everyone answers to someone on the show. Debra is the weakest link due to her over-the-top sensitivity. Writing an entertaining married couple, however, is admittedly a great challenge. (Friend) Chris Golden pointed out that Frank is the most comfortable with himself. He may be a grumpy old timer who speaks his mind and is unfazed by social norms, but that’s why we like him.

Everybody Loves Raymond has won 12 Emmys, including four for Roberts, three for Garret, two for Heaton, one for Romano, and two for Comedy Series (sorry Boyle). Eleven of the show’s writers received Emmy nominations and one writer won. I bet you the whole group was like one big family.

Caleb S Garcia
October 10, 2011

Steve Jobs and Pixar

2011-10-07T02:31:00.000-07:00

The world lost a legend. RIP Steve Jobs. The passing of Mr. Jobs reminds me of how Pixar came to be. It’s one of my favorite stories in all of Hollywood. It involves four major players and Steve Jobs is one them. Earlier this year when Cars 2 came out, I read an article about John Lasseter in Esquire magazine (God I love Esquire. Ever see the Christina Hendricks issue? Me-oh-my). The article told a fascinating story of the right people banning together at the right time. It was an A Team where the A stood for animation.

You see, one day, while working at Disney, John Lasseter saw some early “light cycle” footage for the movie Tron (1982). Lasseter became passionate about computer generate imagery and vowed to make feature films with CGI animation. Lasseter and friends started by applying hand drawn animation onto CGI backgrounds. But doing this was expensive. And Disney didn’t want to pay for it. The Great Mouse Detective (1986) was the first Disney film to feature CGI backgrounds. When Lasseter pushed for more CGI, Disney fired him.

Still determined to make CGI films, Lasseter met some like minded people at Lucasfilm. Let us turn back the clock even more- when George Lucas created the Star Wars trilogy from 1977 to 1983, he didn’t just write some space fiction, he created everything that went with it. Lucas was a master at assembling the right people for the job. Lucas and team were major innovators in special effects, sound, and CGI. Lucasfilm started Industrial Light and Magic, THX, Skywalker Sound, and a Computer Graphics Group (and he did it all for the Star Wars trilogy - thank God that was pre-divorce).

So Lasseter starts working with Lucas’s Computer Graphics Group and makes a revolutionary, all-CGI short film. Lucasfilm was impressed. This is the short film that would become Toy Story and Toy Story, for all intents and purposes, is a second Star Wars. But at the time Lucas wasn’t interested in hiring animators, he wanted to develop the technology. So now that Lucasfilm had the tech, he sold the Computer Graphics Group to Steve Jobs in 1986, because Jobs wanted the technology.

To make a long story short, it’s the mid-1980s and Jobs gets fired from Apple. Jobs, who is now a family man with kids, wants to venture into new territory so he buys the previously mentioned Computer Graphics Group to fund, innovate, and turn a profit. Fun fact: Lucasfilm had a digital compositing computer called the Pixar Imaging Computer. So Jobs calls his new company Pixar and becomes the Chairman and CEO. So Lasseter and company get to work on Toy Story and in 1995 Disney agrees to distribute the film and it makes 350 million worldwide. History was made.

So Disney, led by CEO Michael Eisner, makes a three picture distribution deal with Pixar that eventually turned into a five picture deal where profits and production costs were split 50/50. During this time, Jobs and Eisner would frequently clash but when the dust settled in 2006, Disney bought Pixar for 7.4 billion dollars. Jobs, who was the majority shareholder at 51 percent, earned billions over night. And the rest is history. Jobs returned to Apple as CEO and made the iPod, iPhone, iPad, Mac Book and other cool stuff. Disney/Pixar made Ratatouille in 2007 and the company has won the Best Animated Feature Oscar every year since. Thank you Steve Jobs for the wonderful role that you played.

For a summation of events, here is the Esquire quote below:

“John Lasseter started out making CGI short-films for the director George Lucas, until Steve Jobs, freshly fired from his dream job, bought the entire animation unit from Lucas for $10 million and called it Pixar. Jobs was buying the technology, of course, and after Lasseter started making money, Jobs, 20 years after buying the company in 1986, sold it to Disney for $7.4 billion. Now, Lasseter is working for Disney as chief executive of three studios: Pixar, Disney Animation, and Imagineering.”
– Tom Junod, Esquire (June 2011)

Jobs and Lasseter are kindred spirits. Both worked for a dream company, got fired, formed Pixar, and then returned to the original company stronger and wealthier - may their example inspire.

Caleb S Garcia
October 7, 2011

VC #1: Leadership

2011-10-06T01:04:00.000-07:00

I have begun my application to Teach For America, and I’m going to be honest with you, I have a bad feeling about this. I have learned to trust my feelings. Our instincts are here to help and protect us. Teach For America could be an angry bear and I’m a helpless deer. But my deer ears perk up as the bear approaches, and Caleb-the-deer sprints away. While I don’t think joining Teach For America will end in my physical demise, or even my emotional demise, I don’t think applying will bare much fruit. The main reason is that I’m not the right man for the job. I base this conclusion on a previous experience. A year ago I applied for the Peace Corps. I filled out the application and had a one-on-one interview at the Peace Corps office. The guy asked me all sorts of questions about my leadership experience and my problem solving abilities. He also said I would have to get a plethora of shots which is bad news bears for my needle-phobic self. While reading through the Teach For America website, I came across a similar qualification. They want a leader. They want a driven and assertive individual who wants to teach under-privileged children with all his or her heart, and that’s not me (sorry kids). I could do it, and I could be fine at it. I’ve tutored for No Child Left Behind and had a great experience. But this is a bigger commitment than driving to Pacoima three times a week and using an English workbook I bought from Barns and Noble to fill the time.

Now I could be a leader in certain things. If I was working on a film and really passionate about it then I would pour my heart and soul into it and work day and night to make it right. I would turn into a creature of obsession and devotion. But overall, I’m not a leader and I’m okay with that. I’m more of a behind the scenes guy. In addition to this main reason for leaning against Teach For America, there are several smaller reasons that justify my point. I mention these only to make myself feel better. The biggest need in the program is for Math and Science and those are my two worst subjects (hence the English major). The average GPA of the accepted is a 3.6 and I have a less impressive 2.9. So here’s the dilemma: do I invest all that time and energy filling out an application when I probably won’t get picked anyway? And if I do get picked, do I really want to get picked? I guess I can always apply and change my mind later. Working on this application has taught me something: busy begets busy. Planning my future in any capacity is good for me. And the more I look, the more paths I see. I just need to find the right one.

Caleb S Garcia
October 6, 2011

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (S:1)

2011-06-07T18:06:00.000-07:00

Review of Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Season 1 (1997) [C+]

What drew you Buffy the Vampire Slayer after all these years?

Growing up I was aware of Buffy but never watched it. My 8th grade Science teacher had a life size standee of Sarah Michelle Geller in his classroom. I also had a neighbor who was a big Buffy / Angel fan. I was a WB fan. I enjoyed Smallville since its inception in 2001 (when I was in 8th grade). Later on, I watched vampire show upon vampire show. Somewhere between True Blood and The Vampire Diaries, I thought about Buffy (how would these vamps compare to OG 90s vamp Angel?). I saw a few Firefly episodes and was impressed with Joss Whedon’s work. Then I feel head-over-heels for Dr. Horrible. Now a Whedon fan, I committed to watching his cult classic series. I saw the 1992 film and ordered Season One off Amazon. Then I began.

What do you think of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?

Buffy is a fun-filled, snappy lipped, adventure romp about a not-so-average girl in a not-so-average town. It reminds me a lot of Smallville, the first season of which has a similar “Freak of the Week” formula. In Buffy, creator Joss Whedon finds his voice early on. As he irons out the details, his style becomes more consistent and he discovers what the show is. Overall, Season One is a little weak. It’s a glimpse of potential. The show certainly demonstrates that it’s capable of interesting story telling. Sarah Michelle Geller sells the show, that and the fact that Whedon is a visionary. Of course Whedon doesn’t know that yet. In 1997, he was just starting out. What he had was a gimmick. He wanted to take the typical horror movie formula of the blonde girl who’s always attacked in the dark alley or graveyard and turn it on its head. He wanted to empower the girl and make her a slayer. “Into each generation a Slayer is born. One girl in all the world, a Chosen One. One born with the strength and skill to fight the vampires, to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their numbers.” The hero was set, she just needed help.

Alyson Hannigan is superb as Willow. I love that name Willow, I would very much like to name my hypothetical, future daughter Willow. Willow is smart and sweet, logical and clever. Chloe (Smallville) and Willow are similar in their archetypal role. Willow and Cordelia are there to balance Buffy out. They are opposing personality types. Yes, Buffy could be one of the popular kids- a cheerleading beauty with flashy fashion and a happening social life. But Buffy has a bigger fish to fry. Willow helps Buffy with the frying, and being Buffy’s friend gives Willow a confidence boost. The show is realistic in that it can’t be all action all the time. Episodes typically involve a mystery to solve. Willow and Rupert Giles are the behind-the-scenes researchers that allow the Buffy show to go on.

Charisma Carpenter is great as Cordelia because she always says what’s on her mind. It isn’t always much but it’s always confident. She’s not trying to be mean as much as she’s expressing her social philosophy- survival of the fittest. Already a target for angry students turned supernatural folk; Cordelia garners some victim sympathy while providing some key, over-the-top, yuppie humor. It’s evident that this character will develop as an inner circle member.

Xander (Nicholas Brandon) is an incarnation of Whedon. He has no special skills or area of expertise. Instead he’s the everyday man. He represents the audience. He’s friends with Willow, has a crush on Buffy (the rejection from the Season finale was sweet), and is anxious to help anyone with anything. Giles is the other part of Whedon, the idealized part. Anthony Stewart Head gives a spot on performance as the Watcher to the Slayer. He’s the authoritative presence who lends credence to the all the supernatural activity that comes out of Hellmouth. He’s Whedon’s mouthpiece for the show’s mythology- both ancient and new.

(Side Note: Kudos to Whedon for the name Buffy. I’ve never heard the name in all the world but the name is perfect for the title character. The name doesn’t fit Kristy Swanson from the 1992 film, but it works perfectly for Sarah.)

I was happy to learn that the original Willow (Riff Regan) from the unaired pilot was replaced by Hannigan. The studio made a wise decision on that one. Tangent: And what about the studios? Buffy certainly weaves a tangled web. Whedon sold the script to 20th Century Fox and Fran R. Kuzui to produce the film. Four years after the film, Fox approached Whedon for a TV development. As writer and director, Whedon created the Pilot and Fox was happy. Fox owned the rights but didn’t want to distribute it themselves. Instead they shopped around and (thankfully) sold the distribution rights to the WB where Buffy ran for five seasons. After five seasons, Whedon (to my knowledge) left the show as head runner and took a more back seat approach (although he will still involved). At the same time, the WB opted out of distribution and UPN took over for the last two years. I love learning about this behind-the-scenes stuff. I find it fascinating: End Tangent.

Buffy started as a mid-season replacement for a show called Savannah and thus only contains 12 episodes. Although some of the episodes are FOTW filler, there is a through line about a guy called The Master- a very old vampire who wants to escape from the underworld and drink the blood of the Slayer. This underworld lies below Sunnydale, California - a suburban town that’s probably two hours (or so) from Los Angeles. Sunnydale is a hotspot, a central hub for paranormal activity. Under it likes the aforementioned Hellmouth which is like a portal from the underworld. This plot device is like the Smallville's kryptonite which, as alien meteor rocks, has supernatural effects on people- sometimes giving them powers and often driving them mad. Clark takes on the role of a chosen one in his own right. In Smallville, Clark feels responsible for the meteor shower that devastated his Kansas town. In Buffy, I’m not sure how the Slayer is chosen. Does the location of the Hellmouth indicate the Slayer, or does the location of the Slayer indicate the Hellmouth? Or does fate make the figurative planets align?

At any rate, Angel (David Boreanaz) pops up here and there in Season One. The episode “Angel” is a Season highlight. After killing for many years, Angel’ soul was restored by some gypsies and the killings stopped. The Angel / Buffy romance works because Buffy works. She is a strong, interesting, charismatic female protagonist. She’s someone that everyone can like and root for. Unlike Clark who keeps his powers a secret, Buffy isn’t super-super and blends right in. Clark is an outsider. Buffy has a loyal support group. Trade the Torch for the library and the Kents for Giles and you’re good to go. Although Buffy is more interesting than Clark, Lex is more interesting then Angel- the role reversals balance out (more or less).

Season One packs a few highlights. The two part Pilot does a fine job of introducing the characters. Buffy gets over her reluctance quickly when vampires start showing up at The Bronze. It’s a clever twist in "The Witch" when mother and daughter swap bodies. Plus, Buffy’s cheerleading days prove short lived. “Never Kill a Boy” is dull because keeping secrets is dull. “The Pack” is a decent concept and our first “character not acting like himself” plot. The bad guy twist and the general fun of the ep. make it worthwhile. The aforementioned “Angel” is great. Whedon likes the idea that vampires explode into dust when they die because it’s less morbid and less to clean up. In “I Robot, You Jane” a demon, who’s diary is scanned into a computer, starts harassing the kids via IM. It’s a very cheesy Willow-centric episode where we meet a potential love interest for Giles, Jenny Calendar.

Most of “The Puppet Show” plays like mediocre filler but the twist is clever town. Sid the Puppet is really a demon slayer and there’s another girl behind the killings. The Buffy/Willow/Xander dramatic reading at the end is fun. “Nightmares” started off okay but became a great episode. A kid in a coma haunts the school and makes the characters live out their nightmares. The line between reality and imaginary is blurred and Buffy and Giles share some emotional fear moments. “Invisible Girl” is lame and mainly acts as a metaphor for how outcasts fill invisible- the invisible classroom at the end is cool though. “Prophesy Girl” is a fine Season One finale. The Master surfaces and Buffy must face him. There were some over-dramatic moments, but the Giles / Angel / Xander scenes worked well and Buffy kicked ass in a stunning white dress. Whedon seems to get better with age and his hyperbolic distress tales and character empowerment lend well to audiences. Let the slaying continue.

Caleb S Garcia
June 7, 2011

X-Men: First Class (2011)

2011-06-03T23:05:00.000-07:00

[B+] The question to ask about X-Men: First Class, or any creative endeavor for that matter, is does it work? As source material, the X-Men comics feature decades of stories and character arcs written and illustrated by a variety of comic book legends. The filmmakers behind First Class (director/co-writer Matthew Vaughn, producer/co-writer Bryan Singer, co-writer Sheldon Turner, etc.) made a series of judgment calls and took several liberties, yet wisely adapted successful, comic book lore into a fine film. The final product honors the established universe and explores unchartered territory. It’s fun, dramatic, and original. In short, it works.

It was a blessing in disguise when Mathew Vaughn dropped out of directing X-Men: The Last Stand due to the unworkable conditions of a rushed schedule. Angry at the final product, Vaughn declared, “I could have made something a hundred times better…something with far more emotion and heart…I genuinely believe it.” Hyperbole aside, Vaughn’s prediction came to pass. First Class holds an 87 percent Rotten Tomatoes rating while The Last Stand has a 57 percent approval rating. The blessing - and key component to First Class’s success - is that Vaughn got to collaborate with Singer (who was uninvolved with The Last Stand’s production).

When we first see Charles Xavier in the comics, he’s a wheelchair-bound, bald professor. Xavier’s “first class” consists of Cyclops, Jean, Iceman, Angel, and Beast. The first class in the film mirrors that of the comics. Beast is Beast, Cyclops is replaced by his brother Havoc, Angel, by fellow flyer Banshee, and Mystique, like Jean, is the lone female. Considering the cast of characters available to work with, the writers formed an excellent group. Beast, who is older than his fellow X-Men in Part 3, is Xavier’s right hand man. He’s the true leader and fan favorite that Cyclops never was. Banshee’s daughter, Siren, was featured in X2, making Banshee an ideal choice for First Class. Havok, as a character, is minor enough to escape the confines of continuity. Mystique is a rich and fascinating character- she is a welcome presence in First Class (and conveniently, she ages slowly). It’s here that the film one-ups the comic series. First Class avoids the popular comic pitfall of the lone female by having Mystique (good girl gone bad), Moira MacTaggert, and Angel Salvadore (the butterfly girl) in practical roles.

The students, however, are only there to make First Class an X-Men movie. And it’s a joy to see the dynamic of a young Charles interact with these younglings as more of an older brother then a father figure. It’s the perfect precursor to the tales that lie ahead. By fleshing out Charles Xavier and Erik Lensherr, I'm able to appreciate the first film more. As Charles and Erik, James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender give fine performances. To echo Vaughn, the success of this film is based on two things: emotion/heart and convincing special effects- the film sold me on both.

The sibling-like relationship between Mystique and Charles works for a stand-alone film more than it does in the series. In the series, their relationship (friends since childhood) lacks believability. She’s not that important in Charles’s life. It would have been better if they met as adults and she was one of the first (of many) people that Charles befriended and helped. Understandably, FOX was probably anxious to utilize the talents of Oscar nominee Jennifer Lawrence. Mystique appears more frequently in human form which acts as a starting point for her development into the proud-nudist Mystique. Mystique’s quasi-romance with Hank McCoy (Nicholas Hoult) was a well played anchor. I can see the memory in Kelsey Grammer's eyes when he comments in X3, "she does do that." Mystique's seduction of Erik, however, was a rushed attempt to escalate a scandalous relationship. It served a purpose but was ultimately too much too soon.

There were some character and story choices that were off in First Class. Although Hank was convincing as the nerdy genius behind constructing the Blackbird Jet and Cerebro, I envisioned Beast, in human form, to be less like Peter Parker and more like Jason Segal- fun, smart, and dorky. Erik should have been more involved in the building of Cerebro. Erik is portrayed like an ex-military, James Bond-esque, introvert. He’s like Wolverine post Weapon X. If the film covered more time, Erik could have taken a breather from his revenge-minded plotting, and contributed as more of an expert. A little more shared history between Charles and Erik would have been nice. This story, however, was not the story of how Charles and Erik met at 17. The film had the difficult task of establishing Charles and Erik as close friends who have a falling out a few weeks later.

First Class masters the three-act structure. At the risk of being over-stuffed rather than anti-climatic, the film is packed from start to finish. We open with the contrasting back stories of Charles and Erik. Charles is an Oxford man, a socialite that hits on women and reads a lot. McAvoy carries the roll like a pro and the portrayal of Xavier’s power is spot on. He can read minds, he can speak to people telepathically, he can see things from another's POV, and he can plant thoughts in someone's mind. He’s the ideal leader, linked to everyone mentally. It’s no wonder that Erik, annoyed at Charles’s mind reading, is anxious to wear Sebastian Shaw’s helmet.

Erik is just as powerful. In the first act, he goes through various European towns and seeks revenge along the way. The Erik killings play out a tad long. Erik is best when he’s on a mission, like infiltrating a secure layer to find Emma Frost (January Jones). Frost, by the way, is delectable eye-candy with an all white, 1960s wardrobe. As Shaw’s loyal assistant, she’s calculated and cold. She was exactly what she needed to be. Although Riptide (aka tornado guy) was okay, the Shaw / Frost / Azazel (aka red Nightcrawler) team is a slick, deadly trio for Xavier and co. to reckon with.

Sebastian Shaw (a cool Kevin Bacon) wants World War III. He wants to help Russia provide Cuba with nuclear warheads. Moria MacTaggert (Rose Byrne), as a CIA agent, spies on Shaw and learns of his sketchy company and sinister plans. She recruits Charles and Mystique to help. The group begins as a CIA unit, but later branches off as the X-Men. While trailing Shaw, Charles meets Erik who joins the cause for mutual benefit. The two recruit other mutants including Darren, who is later killed by Shaw, and Angel, who joins Shaw.

The plot builds to a fantastic showdown. Erik lifts Shaw’s submarine out of the water and onto land. Azazel and Angel fight against Beast and Havoc in a splendid battle- Mystique kind of hangs out. Vaughn achieves the emotion and heart that he promised. Erik wants to reverse the missiles back at the American and Russian subs, but Charles tackles him to the ground to stop him. The fight results in a deflected bullet paralyzing Charles from the waist down. After Erik gives a dramatic speech, the X-Men choose sides. Mystique, a little prematurely but whatever, joins Erik and they all vanish with Azazel.

Vaughn, not content with all the existing references, throws in a few more haphazardly. Charles is in a wheelchair, Moira suggests the name X-Men, Erik frees Frost from jail and introduces himself as Magneto. How many iconic story elements to include is a judgment call that Vaughn and co. had to make. With no guarantee of a sequel, Vaughn wanted to tie up all loose ends and set up the existing trilogy. Even if the resolution is a little overstuffed and corny on delivery, X-Men: First Class is a bravado success and high spirited, cinematic gold. It gets the fan boy and fantasy buff seal of approval.

Caleb S Garcia
June 3, 2011

"Mystique" by Beast (webisode)

2011-05-28T11:41:00.000-07:00

Back when I posted the "Calling Amy Brent" webisode, I wrote in the Comment section, "I think my next webisode will have to use action figures." Well that has come to pass and now we have this thing. The music (the three-beat poem with the added chorus) was inspired by the song "Freeze Ray" from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog.

"Mystique" by Beast

Mys-ti-que, Raven D
Blue and strange, Just like me

Mutant crush, socialize
You’re the one, yellow eyes

With Xavier I can read your mind
That’s invasive; I’ll just ask you out this time

You can be, anyone
Charm the heart, of any son

I like you, how you are
Scaly skin, super star

With Xavier I can read your mind
That’s invasive; I’ll just ask you out this time

Kicking ass, confident
You are my, compliment

Help you with, some issues
I’m obsessed, nerdy too

With Xavier I can read your mind
That’s invasive; I’ll just ask you out this time

Win your hand, with my chin
Monkey feet, Beastly grin

Jen Lawrence, Oscar date
Hunger Games, jail bait

With Xavier I can read your mind
That’s invasive; I’ll just ask you out this time

But for now, X-Men pride
Fight with me, by my side

Red dresses, more to wear
On that day, we’ll be there

Caleb S Garcia
May 28, 2011

V. Diaries 2.22 "As I Lay Dying"

2011-05-14T18:32:00.000-07:00

Although “The Sun Also Rises” seemed like the natural season finale, The Vampire Diaries, to its credit, takes the show one step further. In “As I Lay Dying,” named after the 1930 William Faulkner novel, Damon, who is dying due to a wolf bite, digresses into flashbacks and hallucinations. Finding a cure was inevitable, and the concept that Klaus’s blood can heal Damon is an intelligent solution. After all, it would have been anti-climatic for Klaus to become a hybrid and then pop up randomly in season three.

The idea that Stefan trades himself for Klaus’s blood was both consistent with Stefan’s character and explains Klaus’s interest in Stefan. The show is not called “Mystic Falls” – I hope that season three brings the characters outside of their hometown as Damon, Elena, and co. track down Klaus and Stefan. Maybe they will look for Elijah first, that would be splendid. I’m sure he wants revenge. Maybe Elijah will resurrect his other family members and they will combine powers to stop Klaus. For now, I’m glad that Elijah and Katherine are out of the story- back to basics people.

For as sloppy as the execution was, season two pulled out a lot of stops. Whenever a finale ends on a big group effort, the involved characters must separate and operate independently to retain dramatic growth. “As I Lay Down” was smart because it acted more like a season premiere then as a finale. The writers were reassuring the audience that a new arc is born, and that the ideas are still flowing.

I loved the end scene with Jeremy seeing ghosts of girlfriends past. The kid needed something supernatural to happen to him. I like that Alaric is staying at the house, he’s one of the best characters on the show and I hope that he continues couch crashing. Stefan binge drinking the blood was odd but ultimately it worked. It’s a bold move taking Stefan down that path, but I appreciate the gesture. The trick is to make sure that Stefan isn’t too light-switch evil. His inner conflict needs to play out. Stefan is drunk on blood. We need to see the hangover, as well as the bloodaholic craving it more and more.

Main points

- Damon apologizes to Elena but she’s not in the mood to talk.
- Damon drinks a fine scotch, attempts suicide, but Stefan stops him. The fact that Damon would even attempt this just proves how awesome Damon is.
- Alaric decides to sober up and help Damon.
- The town hosts a pointless Gone with the Wind screening.
- Bonnie as “Emily” doesn’t want to help Stefan.
- Mama Lockwood tells the Sherriff to crack down on the vamps.
- Stefan tells Elena about D-Dawg.
- Flashback: Damon ties Kat’s corset but whoa Elena shows up, trippy.
- Klaus stabs Elijah and, with the dagger left in this time, “reunites” him with the family.
- Klaus stabs Stefan and proves that he can kill him. This is the scene we needed earlier.
- Damon tells Alaric to kill him, Alaric doesn’t. Then the Sherriff shows up and Damon escapes.
- Klaus reminds Stefan that he used to be the ripper of 1917 Monterey.
- Klaus infects/ heals Kat.
- The Sheriff aims for Damon but shoots Jeremy accidently. Caroline tries to feed him blood but that would be too easy. It’s up to Bonnie to work some magic.
- Klaus wants Stefan to do a “decade long bender.”
- Bonnie brings Jeremy back to the Witch House. She does a spell but the witches are angry and don’t want to help- “there will be consequences.” The spell takes a lot out of Bonnie. She bleeds from the nose and the blood discolors her teeth. The spell works and Jeremy lives.

- Elena finds Damon but he’s having a trippy flashback where he drinks from Kat. Revelation: It’s not Stefan’s fault that Damon’s a vampire, Damon choose to drink from Katherine (It’s a good thing Civil War Damon was more gentle, otherwise that bite could have been bad).
- Caroline and her mom have a lame hugging moment.
- Jeremy and Bonnie say goodnight. Bonnie is convincing. Alaric sticks around which is probably a good idea since Klaus, Elijah, and Kat were occupying his apartment.
- Elena and Damon share a moment. In a sequence of sentimental nurturing that happens way too fast, Elena falls for the wounded soldier and kisses Damon. Then Kat shows up with the blood (she owed him one). Damon is saved.
- “It’s ok to love them both. I did” says Katherine- then she’s gone.
- Klaus and Stefan share a girl. Now Stefan’s ready.
- Jeremy develops a sixth sense.

Hold the phone, why do Klaus and Elijah return to the apartment after Klaus’s werewolf episode? Maybe it’s because Katherine was still under Klaus’s power and couldn’t leave. Or maybe it’s because Klaus wants to “kill” Elijah and stick him in the same coffin he used to get here- So unfinished business.

Thus we conclude Season Two of the hit CW show The Vampire Diaries. “Dawson’s Creek- with Superman” may have ended, but there’s still plenty of “Dawson’s Creek- with vampires” to go around.

Caleb S Garcia

May 14, 2011

V. Diaries 2.21 "The Sun Also Rises"

2011-05-06T14:44:00.000-07:00

Taking its name from 1926 Earnest Hemingway novel, “The Sun Also Rises” suggests the start of something new- unless you’re Jenna, HA! Beginning precisely where the previous episode ended, Caroline and Matt escape Tyler-the-wolf and Damon gathers info from Katherine.

As great as this episode was, there were flaws, flaws that are hard to look past. Klaus doesn’t give us any real reason to fear him. The threat that Klaus will kill anyone who tries to stop him is based purely on reputation. Klaus has one remaining witch to help him, doesn’t do any of the kidnapping himself. Using Jenna as a replacement is out of nowhere. Elijah managed to track down everyone. Klaus could have easily overpowered and kidnapped Damon, or Stefan, or Caroline (I guess not Katherine because she “helped” him). Anyways, Jenna and Julie are captured with the witch and Klaus standing by. Despite having three vampires, an original, a witch, a werewolf, and three humans, there is little Team Elena does to disrupt (or delay as Damon wanted) Klaus’s plan.

ANYWAYS…that is neither here nor there, rant over. John Gilbert shows up and acts dramatic. Klaus and witch begin the ritual by burning the moonstone and killing Jules. Stefan decides to sacrifice himself but Klaus has a Sheen-like goddess fetish and sticks with the newbie. Jenna and Elena exchange emotional conversation about how they both failed each other. Elijah says that “sometimes there’s honor in revenge” – so this time it’s personal.

John and crew discover a spell that will allow Elena to die with her soul still intact thus allowing her to resurrect (how this overpowers the vampire blood I’m not sure). Caroline and Matt have a boring, soap-opera talk. Later, he breaks up with her and blondie rebounds with wolf-boy. Bonnie casts a spell that keeps Jeremy, John, and Alaric in the house (so that wasn’t a kiss of death after all).

Klaus continues his plan by killing Jenna but not before she makes a break for it to kill the witch. Meanwhile, stabbed in the back Stefan awakens but is too weak to do anything. Klaus then drinks Elena’s blood till she “dies.” Then, as Klaus begins transformation, Bonnie releases her fury on Klaus. Elijah runs to finish the job, and goes to rip out his heart, but – SHOCKER – Klaus tells Elijah that his family is still alive and promises to show him. So Elijah spares Klaus and the two speed away into the darkness.

John walks outside and falls to the ground for an unexplained reason (I know he took off the ring, but why the fall?). So the whole gang, sans John, goes to Aunt Jenna’s funeral. John says some overly-sentimental gibberish in a letter. So the curse is broken and Klaus is a powerful hybrid. Damon is bitten, so his days are numbered- but don’t tell Damon the odds, he will find a way, or make one.

Caleb S Garcia

May 6, 2011

V. Diaries 2.20 "The Last Day"

2011-04-29T11:55:00.000-07:00

In competition for being last, “The Last Day” proves superior to “The Last Dance” probably because not being able to dance again is minor compared to never seeing the light of day again. Will this be the last day for Jules the Werewolf and Jenna the new vampire, or Elena’s last day as a human? The first two would be great.

Damon is amazing; he kicks all kinds of ass. The more that Stefan goes on romantic walks with Elena, and the more Elijah stands around, the better Damon becomes. Do you know why? Because Damon is logical. There’s a method to his madness, he looks for another way and creates one.

Stefan: She chose to trust you too.
Damon: Then maybe you shouldn’t be so sure about her instincts.

Tyler returns! He visits his mom in the hospital but it’s really a ploy for Klaus to capture Tyler and Jules. It was really nice to see these two back. Tyler is less of a tool. I love how Tyler and Caroline have an awkward reunion and then they are forced to be together when they are kidnapped.

Elijah gives Elena a magic elixir that will make her come back alive if she dies (in theory). Damon doesn’t like this so he forces Elena to drink her blood. Now everybody hates Damon, except the audience because now the team is forced to find another way. So Damon and Stefan fight and Damon leaves. I was waiting for Elijah to intervene but no cigar, he was oddly passive.

Elijah: She’ll never forgive you, and never for a vampire is a very long time.

Sherriff Forbes is annoying and Matt becomes the logical one. Damon devises a rescue plan. Katherine tells Damon that Caroline and Tyler are in the tomb. How Kat knows this is a long shot but oh well.

Stefan and Elena go for a walk and Elena is a secretive bitch. Elena asks lots of questions before breaking down and saying “I’m 17, I don’t know enough about life yet, I don’t want to be a vampire.” Stefan is oddly fixated on Elena saying this last part. But yea, she made a decision, and she can cry on cue. Am I the only one who finds it annoying that Bella Swan wants to be a vampire?

Katherine outsmarts Klaus, OMG- Yea for self burning in the name of potential freedom. Matt snipes a guy and Damon saves Caroline and Tyler. Why Damon is reluctant to free Tyler I’m not sure. Freeing or killing Tyler was Damon’s plan and he has yet to learn about Jules.

So Klaus collects Elena. Stefan and Elena say good bye in a moment that’s way too long. Damon, Caroline, and Tyler run through the forest. But Tyler the wolf bites Damon before Damon and Caroline can escape. Damon confronts Klaus in a moment of sheer awesomeness. Klaus knocks Damon out and Damon learns that he is not the back-up vampire because HE IS AS GOOD AS DEAD!! Damon is in jeopardy, I’m legitimately concerned now. Nice cliff-hanger Vampire Diaries. We’ll see what elixir/spell gets pulled out of thin air this time.

As for the vamp sacrifice, I would like to see Katherine die in a self-sacrificing redemptive act, but I have no problems with Jenna dying either. Good bye adult supervision.

Caleb S Garcia

April 29, 2011

V. Diaries 2.19 "Klaus"

2011-04-22T14:07:00.000-07:00

Following one of the worst episodes ever is a superb episode- I guess “The Last Dance” was a fluke. “Klaus” is great, not (so much) because of Klaus, but because it’s the return on Elijah. Elena recruits his help and it’s actually a good idea. For once, Elena is decent and likable. To make way for Elijah and the continuing antics of Klaus/Alaric, the episode cuts Bonnie, Jeremy, Caroline, and Matt – it’s nice to have a breather from those guys- this episode is a back to basics tour de force.

Elena resurrects Elijah because she wants to find another way to stop Klaus that doesn’t involve Bonnie dying. But Elijah hasn’t been invited in so he’s forced out. Elena gives Elijah the dagger so he will trust her. Andy Star is still hanging around for some reason- I guess Damon’s bored now that Kat is MIA (hey, we can’t have aunt Jenna be the only useless character).

Klaus/Alaric IS IN FACT compelling Katherine. I guess that’s the only vampire ability is has in a human body. Like blonde baddie Eric in True Blood, Elijah is evil with a code- a bad guy doing good things. The editing in this episode is great by the way. The cuts between the four stories work well, and fresh off the Scream 4 release, Kevin Williamson, and Julie Plec, do a great job writing the ep.

Elijah: I’m a bit behind on the times, but I believe the term you’re searching for is OMG.

The long awaited event of Jenna knowing finally comes to pass. Klaus is in her house and acting strange, Stefan shows up. Klaus approaches her with a knife and Stefan stops him while acting all vampire like. Later Elena talks with Jenna who, of course, is pissed that no one told her. Hmmm, let’s see how that would have played out:
“Hey guardian, I’m dating a vampire.”
“I forbid you…plus they don’t exist anyway, you’re really just into the emo, bad boy, criminal types and I don’t approve.”
“Well screw you, I’m going to do it anyway and ruin our relationship in the process.”

So Elena visits Jenna and then returns to Elijah. Elena’s decision to do so sparks a feud between the Salvatore brothers. It seems that they are both jealous of Elena spending time with Elijah. Elijah knows how to save the lives of the doppelganger and of Bonnie; we will find out soon.

The Damon/Stefan fight was sweet. It was long overdue and directly parallels the Elijah/Klaus flashback fight- lots of parallels here. Elijah wants an apology- Stefan gives it but Damon sees things differently. Damon leaves, feeds on Andy, and then leaves the building. He’s, well, being Damon.

There are several flashbacks to England 1492- where Elijah and Klaus (the original vampire brothers) dance with Katerina. They are part of the original family (I guess there’s seven in total) - it’s through them that all other vampires were created. And shock- Klaus is a vampire/werewolf hybrid—like those guys in Underworld: Evolution. That whole “curse of the sun and moon” is made up. It’s really just a curse on Klaus. He wants to reverse the curse so he can bring back out the werewolf side of his DNA and thus be the most powerful being on Earth (except witches). Klaus has been trying to break the curse for the last 1,000 years- kudos on determination.

At Alaric’s place, a crew of people (including another witch) shows up with Klaus’s body. In the end, Klaus’s spirit goes out of Alaric and back into Klaus. Klaus has returned.

Caleb S Garcia

April 22, 2011

V. Diaries 2.18 "The Last Dance"

2011-04-16T18:24:00.000-07:00

Most of this episode was bad. If it were divided into four acts, the only good part was the third act. This episode was mostly filler, but it did move us one step closer to the end.

Possessing Alaric, Klaus has bad grammar (badder is not a word).In Alaric’s body, he doesn’t seem to have any vampire abilities. So does he compel Katherine into stabbing herself or not? Because if he didn’t, why would Kat listen to him? He can’t do anything to her as a human. What Kat needs to do is kill the witch, which would break the spell, and then escape. Why she stays there the whole episode is beyond me.

Elena now owns the Salvatore house and invites the brothers in. As mediocre as this episode was, I liked Damon all the way through. Ian Somerhalder has great line delivery. The Matt/Sherriff story is boring as hell and I really hope there’s some payoff that involves blondie getting her vamp on because right now Caroline is the vampire who does nothing vampire like.

The Alaric/Elena/Bonnie/Stefan classroom scene was horrible. It was odd and ill conceived. Klaus is supposed to be this big bad ass and here he is pretending to be a clueless school teacher. I like Klaus’s line later on about not liking the 1960s but rather the 1920s.

All the Bonnie drama was so lame. Let Bonnie do whatever the eff she wants. There’s a concept. People die in battle, that’s their choice to make. Also, if Klaus aims to kill Bonnie and others, wouldn’t he want the element of surprise on his side? Why drop all these lame hints. Stealth dude, stealth.

At the dance, the episode picks up. Klaus either compels some students to attack Jeremy and the brothers, or the students are stupid enough to assalt and attempt murder for some extra credit. There is a lot of uncertainty regarding Klaus’s “powers.” Again, I liked Damon on the dance floor. He acts like a man who knows what he’s doing- someone in control of his environment.

Jeremy spills the beans about Bonnie and soon everyone knows. The secret was lame to begin with, everyone should have known since the beginning. So Bonnie and Elena have a fight and blah, blah, blah. Everyone figures out that “Alaric” is really Klaus and he starts fighting with Bonnie. As expected, Bonnie is weakened and she is smart enough to catch on. Bonnie may be too cocky for her own good but at least she can figure shit out.

Bonnie devises a plan with Damon in which she fakes her own death. Damon, of course, doesn’t tell anyone, so everyone is sad. That spell in which you die and come back is pretty handy. The way Damon tells Stefan and Elena is horrible. He waits way too long. Klaus is out of there the moment Bonnie “dies.” So how about you tell Stefan and Elena then. Don’t take that slap Damon, slap the ho back.

So Bonnie awakens in the witch house where she will be hanging out with Jeremy for awhile. But don’t worry, because Jeremy has “my fi”- plus he’s alone with Bonnie in a house, that means sexy time. Stefan and Damon talk, and Damon “doesn’t mind being the bad guy.” Atta boy Damon, Stefan just got told. Elena, still pissed at Damon, goes down into the tomb and takes the knife out of Elijah. I’m not sure what her plan is exactly, she probably doesn’t have one.

I have to say, I’m really glad Bonnie didn’t die because she is way more pretty/beautiful/attractive then Elena. And Caroline dresses better. Sigh. All and all, this was one of the worst episodes in the history of the show.

Caleb S Garcia

April 16, 2011

The Essential Man: Mark Walton

2011-04-13T00:13:00.000-07:00

Mark Walton is not a fan of motion capture. The technology, mainstreamed by director Robert Zemeckis in films like The Polar Express and Beowulf, was most recently used in the Zemeckis produced film Mars Needs Moms, which is the final film of the Zemeckis/Disney studio Image Movers Digital. Mark saw a complimentary showing of the film at the DreamWorks Studio screening room in Glendale, CA and had a lot to say about it.

I joined Mark for lunch on a beautiful April Monday. The animation studio is a campus of pristine buildings and offices. The ground is layered with stone; bushes and vegetation surround the area. There are grandiose fountains, ping pong tables, and a duck and fish filled river that flows along on the lower level. On the upper level, behind a bush trimmed to look like the DreamWorks boy-fishing-off-the-moon logo is a cafeteria that provided free food to everyone on the lot. As Mark and I stock our trays with the works, he dives into his Mars Needs Moms commentary with rapid fire precision.

I admire Mark’s insightful comments about the film. Beyond being someone who is passionate about story telling in any medium, Mark is an authority when it comes to animation. For ten years he worked as a story artist and voice actor for Disney before relocating to DreamWorks over a year ago. As we gather our burritos, nachos, and salads, Mark explains to me that motion capture characters need to commit. They dance the line between looking too realistic and too cartoony. The result is homely looking characters- what Sigmund Freud called the uncanny valley. This valley is great for corpses, zombies, and Stepford Wife-style humanoid robots, but in animation, the valley can result in creepy facial expressions that take the viewer out of the story. It wasn’t all negative feedback though. Mark enjoyed Mars’s high concept, if familiar, story about a boy who has to save his mother when she is abducted by a group of matriarchal, dictator Martians. Mark even applauded the design of the aliens and the choice of voice actors.

Voice acting is a subject familiar to Mark whose first voice acting gig was on the 2004 film Home on the Range, where he made Bob and Barry come alive, followed by the character Goosey Lossey in 2005’s Chicken Little. Then, in 2008, Mark joined the likes of John Travolta, Miley Cyrus, Susie Essman, and Malcolm McDowell in Bolt, where Mark stole scenes as the lovable hamster Rhino. Voicing Rhino in the CGI, Disney-without-Pixar film was a hay day for Mark. Originally, Mark was signed on as a voice stand in, but he was did such a fine job, and was such a perfect fit for Rhino, that Disney asked him to stay on.

The press tours were icing on the cake if the icing was better than the actual cake. Mark walked the red carpet with his lovely girlfriend Morgane, and even flew in his family from Utah for the El Capitan premiere in Hollywood- sanctioning him the “cool uncle” for life. Aside from the other interviews and press plugging, Mark and Morgan also enjoyed an extended stay in Paris, France for a premiere.

Mark was born on October 24, 1968 in Salt Lake City, Utah. Brought up in the Mormon faith, Mark is the oldest of six, and naturally had to be the adventurous sibling. After high school, Mark spent two years as a missionary in New Mexico. He enjoyed his time in El Paso and the education that travel and service to a community brings. Upon return, Mark attended Utah State University, in the city of Logan, where he earned a B.F.A in Art in 1998.

With degree in hand, an ambitious Mark went to Florida to intern at Disney’s satellite studio (which has since closed down). In that three month period, Mark became a jack of all trades. He tried his hand at being an animator but found that he was more passionate about story boarding. After interning, Mark sent his newly created portfolio to Walt Disney Animated Studios in Burbank, CA who hired him soon after. Mark began at Disney in 1999 and jumped right on board with the Tarzan team- providing finishing touches as both a writer and story artist. Mark also worked on Return to Neverland, Meet the Robinsons, Gnomeo and Juliet, and the Emmy-award winning PBS series Independent Lens.

For the last year, Mark has been honing his talent at DreamWorks, a company that Forbes ranked number six on a list of the 100 Best Companies to Work For. I can vouch for the ranking on the grounds keeping alone. Mark testifies to the great creative force and quality people he’s met at DreamWorks. The studio is set to release Kung Fu Panda 2 and Puss in Boots later this year- both of which feature no motion capture; like Mark, they are 100 percent the genuine article.

After lunch, Mark rushes home to meet the plumber. The cordial conversation lingers in my mind as I begin to understand the events that conceived Mark. He’s a well spring of knowledge, a class act gentleman, and a chap who loves his job. He followed his passion and lives in a dream world that he gets to call reality. Mark, with his cowboy hat, grey beard, Disney jacket, and rounded glasses, heads off to the employee parking while I snoop around the studio for a little longer. I go into the main office and see two Academy Awards on display. It takes a village of talented artists to win an Oscar- and it’s nice to see one of those dreamers work.

Caleb S Garcia

April 11, 2010

V. Diaries 2.17 "Know Thy Enemy"

2011-04-11T21:57:00.000-07:00

“Know Thy Enemy” begins where “The House Guest” ends. Isobel shows up at Elena’s doorstep and causes all kinds of drama. Elena has now met her birth parents. Jenna is pissed of course, that seems to be her one emotion as of late. Nina Dobrev looks really hot as Katherine. The wardrobe, hair, and make up department are really earning their day’s pay. Alaric punches Uncle John, so that’s kind of cool. This episode is about John’s redemption, so let the justice begin.

Caroline drives a Ford Focus with voice activation phone dialing- hopefully this will increase the show’s budget. Isobel tells the gang about Klaus. I like how the inviting in rule has to do with who owns the house deed. Damon, Bonnie, and Jeremy team up on their own adventure. Damon’s a dick, Bonnie’s cute, and Jeremy’s sappy- business as usual for these three.

Kat and Isobel reunite. Lots of ex drama in this ep, it’s a love square. Why do people care so much about finding Matt? So what if he tells people, no one’s going to believe him anyway. Damon goes in the witch burning house and finds that it’s loaded with anti-vampire booby traps. Kat finds the moon stone, damn you moon stone.

I love Isobel in this episode, too bad she dies. She’s delightfully dead pan. Elena picks up some money at the Lockwood house. Isobel bits John and throws him down the stairs, he survives of course. Kat pretends to be Elena, but Stefan catches on, so she stabs him with vervain. Bonnie screams in pain and now possesses the energy of hundreds of dead witches, yea Bonnie.

Damon takes off his shirt, woo hoo! Caroline wears a really sweet plaid skirt with a denim jacket- girl’s got style. There should be a rule that blondie has to do at least one thing vampire-like per episode, otherwise I forget she’s a vampire and I assume that the secret she’s hiding from Matt involves hooking up with a stranger at the Grill. Bonnie does an unnecessary display of power- cue the leaf blowers.

Isobel wears a cool purple skirt under a black pea coat. Hey if you’re going to die the true death why not do it in some style? Her work here is done; it’s time to remove the necklace. Caroline compels Matt into forgetting stuff. But it’s a trick; it’s really the Sheriff who wants Matt to get info from Caroline.

Stefan and Damon give Elena the deed to the house- seems like a decent plan. Bonnie and Jeremy have a dramatic conversation- it’s what couples do. John crawls toward redemption. Hopefully new John will have something to offer the team. At the very least he gives Elena his power, so maybe that will keep her happy until next episode.

Bonnie is a secret weapon the way any black guy is a secret weapon when playing basketball. Witch guy does something and now Alaric is possessed with the spirit of Klaus. And Kat is stuck – good stuff.

Caleb S Garcia

April 11, 2010

The Philosophy of Creation

2011-03-29T22:31:00.000-07:00

The following is theoretical by nature.

My college Professor once said that “All meaning is created.” Philosophically, she was right. Every creation has meaning, and everything and everyone but God Himself is a creation. All creation has purpose. If man wants to discover his meaning, he must look to his creator. When we do this, we discover that we were created to create. Part of being created “in the image and likeness of God” is that we are wired to create.

The goal of every individual should be to do what he was created to do (to be who he was created to be). A person discovers what he was created to do when he creates. What effect does the act of creating have on him? Does it make him happy? Fulfill him? Does he come alive? Does he create it well? If the answer to any of these questions is “yes,” then he is one his way to discover what he was created to do.

People seek to “find themselves” and rightfully so. To find oneself and to know oneself is one in the same. If I don’t know myself, if I cannot answer the above questions, then I will never find out what I was created to do.

For the Christian, the Holy Spirit of God dwells within. Everyone bares the thumbprint of God in their being and in their spiritual nature. One of the primary ways to know and understand God is to journey inside oneself. Understand the creation and you will no doubt learn something about the creator.

It is reasonable to believe that God would not have made us with certain desires, passions, callings, dreams, talents, and gifts unless he also equipped us with the ability to achieve those dreams. God wants us to be who He created us to be and will help us along the way through providence.

A part of meaning is interpretation. A story can have multiple interpretations. There is the author’s intent, and there is the audience’s interpretation which may be different. The author is the creator of the story but he is not the sole creator. He is more of an arranger of existing ideas. He is creating with existing building blocks. When the reader interprets, he creates his own meaning. The author and the reader lend value to the creation which, as an arrangement of existing smaller creations, already has value. All creation has value because the creator has given it value. All of man’s interpretations come from the same source, the Creator God. Perhaps all interpretations, if one is telling the truth, are essentially the same interpretation.

God knows our hearts better than we do because He sees the whole picture, He sees all of creation, and He sees all of what we had to work with. He sees our actions and interprets what it means to our hearts and does so correctly every time. Determinism is a domino effect where the outcome is determined from the initial cause.

God has created beings who can self interpret. Any time man creates, he has an interpretation. God created the man who created X; therefore God already knows the meaning which we only sometimes discover. God also knows what it means to us. This is providence. This is our ability to see that how people interact and the events that unfold in day to day life contain incredible meaning.

When God creates a person, He gives the person meaning and value. A creation cannot give itself ultimate value, only the creator can. We will never value ourselves more than God values us.

There is an expression that people “do not discover themselves but create themselves.” Creation and discovery are not separate ideas. Discovery always occurs when people create. It is a reasonable theory that a person cannot create himself. The person has already been created and, like a seed, the person has within him everything he needs to grow and live out his full potential. The extent to which he lives out his potential is often his choice.

We cannot create our purpose; we are given purpose at creation. We can only add meaning through creation (which is an extension of ourselves and therefore God). We can only discover meaning, we cannot create it. All meaning has already been created.

Side Note: One indicator of a successful creation is that it "self-creates" - meaning that more creators keep the creation going. George Lucas created Star Wars which was so meaningful to so many people that it inspired other creators to create more that same thing.

Caleb S Garcia
March 29, 2011

X-Men Spoof Posters

2011-03-21T21:05:00.000-07:00

I went for the obvious pun with these X-Men spoof posters. It was fun for this life long fan boy.

It was between this and "Order of the (Dark) Phoenix," but I went with the more direct title. I added "Bobby Drake and the" as an afterthought. I love this X3 promo shot of Jean Grey. Adding the glasses and the wand to Bobby was a key touch.

The characters matched well with the Breakfast Club cast. I found sitting down pictures of the X-Kids and cropped them. I took the caption right from the poster. Aside from "brain" and "jock," there are alternate versions of the nicknames on the promo material: beauty / princess, recluse / basket case, rebel / criminal. I wanted to be consistent, so I went with the names from the original poster.

I was reminded by a joke that all women see The Cutting Edge and think that they can change the Hockey Player into the dance partner- so this still of Bobby and Kitty skating was a fun homage. The tagline comes from the poster (with the added word "man").

I was trying to use a shot from City of Angels, but couldn't find a good still/ promo shot. Wings of Desire was a natural second choice. The lower caption is from the Red Hot Chili Peppers song "Under the Bridge" - I had to mention "City of Angels" somehow. I would have used a more interesting city shot but cropping was difficult. This X3 promo shot of Angel, though, is beautiful.

Beauty and the Beast was a must. I wavered on who to use as Beauty, but went with Storm because she is a beauty and she interacts with Beast. I like the simplicity of the shot, and I was able to use background coloring.

"Red Eye" is a fun nickname for Cyclops. I found a great Cyclops picture to crop and added it into the poster. I spent the most time on this poster adjusting it in paint to re-due the window outline.

This came out better than expected. Its a reference to the Striker sequence from Airplane. I was happy to find a picture that contained William Stryker, Lady Deathstrike, and Xavier in it.

The cropping is poor and needs to be redone. It was difficult finding a picture from the X-Men Animated series. The still of Jubilee is from an X2 deleted scene. It was nice to include a character that was neglected from the films.

Simple and nice. The pun was obvious and works well with Storm's weather controlling powers.

Three puns in one. Mr. Freeze is a Batman villain. "Ice to meet you" is the corny joke from The Incredibles and "Cold shoulder" is a standard expression. I love this still from X3. The captions make the picture seem like a dating show.

Caleb S Garcia

March 21, 2010

What's Wrong and What's Right with the X-Men Series

2011-03-16T00:23:00.000-07:00

The X-Men series: The longer the title, the worse the movie. I recently re-watched all four films in an effort to figure out what’s right and what’s wrong with the X-Men films. Here are the reviews.

X-MEN (2000) [B]

The first 20 minutes are flawless, Brian Singer is poetic in his direction, then the problems begin. While driving with Rogue, Logan is attacked by Sabertooth and left unconscious. Scott and Storm show up to help. How did they know to go there? Xavier was likely tracking Sabertooth using Cerebral. Xavier figured that Magneto was after either Rogue or Logan but didn’t know which one. Regardless, Xavier saw Sabertooth attacking mutants and had Scott and Storm suit up and fly from New York to Western Canada to help them. Is there any indication that Scott and Storm were already there? Not really.

This, however, is not the problem. After the fight with Sabertooth, Logan (despite amazing healing abilities) remains unconscious until he is at the X-Mansion hours later. This is a rather convenient and contrived way to get an otherwise reluctant Logan to go to Xavier’s base. I am nitpicking because I care and I want to see how a flawed film could be improved.

Here’s the thing about arc types. There’s the hero and the warrior. In Star Wars, the hero (Luke) seeks out the mentor and wants to join the cause because he feels called to do so. The warrior (Han Solo) is recruited along the way; he is motivated by money, women, glory, and thrills. Although Logan is eventually recruited like the warrior, he should have been introduced to the team this way.

To X-Men’s credit, the plot is well paced, and allows the characters to breath in their own story. Mystique, Sabertooth, and Toad have barely any dialogue. They are so beautiful to look at, and covey so much in expression that they don’t need to say much. There’s no indicating, they simply are. Scott, Storm, and Jean also have careful dialogue and don’t crowd the scenes.

Side Note: When Storm and Scott save Logan and Rogue, they are a bit too stiff in their leather uniforms for their own good. The characters work best in street clothes. The clothes add personality and give the characters an undercover feel. Suiting up should be reserved for special occasions and there should be variety to the uniforms.

The Xavier/Eric relationship is great because they’re not black and white enemies. On principle, Eric doesn’t harm any mutant (except Rogue which he views as an unfortunate but necessary side effect to his plan). Rather than harming, Magneto merely holds the X-Men as temporary prisoners when they’re at the Statue of Liberty (his henchmen don’t even aim to kill them). To kill a mutant would render Magneto a traitor. Magneto kills the occasional human but only those that attack him first or “stand in his way.”

Mystique poisons Cerebral so that Xavier cannot use it to locate Rogue. How she does this I do not know. I’m fine if Xavier is temporarily on the bench, but there needed to be a scene that explains Magneto’s intentions behind “poisoning” Xavier. It is out of character for Eric to do any real damage to his old friend. To the film’s credit, a bed-ridden Xavier also incorporate the plot device where the mentor “dies” so the hero can grow up and do it on his own.

The film pokes fun at itself with the code names which is nice in a self-reflexive way, but doesn’t completely work. The film is more drama than comedy and has to believe with utter conviction that these characters could exist in real life. Authenticity sells. This is a minor point.

Magneto’s plan seems better on paper than it does on film. I don’t recall humans ever being turned into mutants in the comic books. Senator Kelly is interesting as an individual. It makes sense for Magneto to teach one person a lesson, but to changing all the leaders of the U.N. into mutants seems drastic. Also, the Statue of Liberty is too iconic of a location for the film’s climax to take place. Again, the last act seems fine on paper but on film it’s anti-climatic. It lacks an umph, a wow.

To quote Roger Ebert’s review: “How a machine could create a desired mutation within a generation is not much explored by the movie, which also eludes the question of why you would want to invest your enemies with your powers.”

Indeed, the third act is the weak link of the film. If the X-Men have to get through the Brotherhood first to foil Magneto’s plan, then there has to be a real plan to foil. In general, the kidnap card is overplayed. Maybe the “attack on the X-Mansion” scene from part two should have been moved up. Sometimes a bigger budget and a more ambitious dive into comic book lore is the answer to a weak ending.

X2 (2003) [B+]

Brian Singer dubbed X2 his Empire Strikes Back- the film that set the bar for great sequels (along with Aliens and T2). There are structure parallels to be sure. X2, like Empire, divides the characters in separate teams. Xavier and Scott visit Magneto, Jean and Storm seek out Nightcrawler, and Logan and the X-Kids escape the mansion invasion. It’s the film’s middle, the second act that makes X2 the best X-Men film.

The problems with X2 are less obvious and are mainly in the third act. The place where Logan underwent William Stryker’s Weapon X project, Alkali Lake in Canada, should not have been the same place where the film’s third act takes place. To do so is to undermine Logan’s initial trip to the base at the beginning of the film. The focus on Logan and Stryker’s past renders X2 too Logan-centric for its own good. Remember the arc types? Logan is a warrior, and it’s great (even encouraged) to show a warrior’s back story, but ultimately the main story belongs to the hero.

The solution is to take the scene where Logan is examining the old Weapon X lab, and add it to the beginning when Logan is exploring Alkali Lake. The presence of Stryker and the fight against Lady Deathstrike is enough Wolverine-plot for one film. Lady Deathstrike was underused and would have been great for the film if her character was fleshed out. This is supposed to be the woman that Logan fell in love with during his time in Japan.

The Nightcrawler opening was superb. I would prefer if more went into Stryker’s method of “controlling” the mutants. Simply applying a drop of a chemical to the back of a mutant’s neck seems too easy. If it was that simple, then Stryker would have had a mutant army protecting him at the base. You know the device that Stryker puts on Xavier’s head? Something a little more obvious like this would have been better to use on Nightcrawler. Mind control is an overused plot device as it is.

Actor Brian Cox does is terrific as William Stryker. He is able to maintain the same gravitas as Magneto and Xavier. He delivers the lines with utter conviction, like when calling Logan “the Wolverine.”

The opening museum scene is fine (I could have used less obvious, indicating Pyro drama) until Xavier gets there. Simply put, Xavier is too powerful and too easy a target in the trilogy. At the museum, he freezes everyone in motion. With Cerebral, he is able to kill or harm every mutant and/ or human. Stryker’s attempt to wield this power (and Magneto’s attempt to reverse it) makes the film too Xavier-centric. Xavier is essentially used as a plot device, a source of power to be used.

Xavier is the “mentor that dies” (or incapacitated, or needs saving) in every film. One idea behind the Xavier character is that he is physically weak and not all that threatening. He works best when he is threatening on a personal scale, but not on large scale. Yet from his wheelchair and with Cerebral, Xavier is the biggest threat to man and mutant kind.

Stryker’s genocide ambitions are too high. There is too much implied devastation when Xavier, controlled by Stryker and Jason, causes billions of people and many mutants to suffer splitting headaches for (at least) a few minutes. Tons and tons of destruction and chaos could have happened during that time.

Devin pointed out that when the X-Jet gets hit by a missile and begins crashing, the jet happens to fall right where Magneto is in the forest (cool looking but inconsistent logic). The jet was on its way to the mansion (from Boston to Westchester) and presumably got off course.

To their credit, Jean and Storm look great in their new haircuts. I like how the characters wear clothes that are a cross between street clothes and their uniforms (like the X-Jackets). The scene were Logan and co. go to Bobby Drake’s house is well played. Rogue’s powers become less consistent but in a good way. She has a lame girl-power moment where she takes off a glove and approaches Magneto, but that’s a quick edit. I liked Jean’s “death” and her sacrifice at the end. I would have fleshed out her Phoenix story even more.

X-MEN: THE LAST STAND (2006) [B-]

Kent once said, after seeing Live Free or Die Hard, “I hope they don’t make another one because then John McClain will have to save the world.” Such is the feeling I have with X3. The stakes are raised to the limit; it really is the last stand. The only place left to go is backwards. The Wolverine film journeyed backwards a few years ago and will spawn a sequel, and the new Charles/Eric prequel X-Men: First Class is due this summer.

There are many problems with X-Men: The Last Stand. As a director, Brett Ratner is struggles with drama. The film lacks emotional investment, heart, and doesn’t breathe or pace enough. The action is sometimes too grandiose and the story is over packed with characters. Also, Brett Ratner is kill happy. He has no problem offing Scott, Xavier, and Jean. The X-Men comic books managed to run many, many years and tell many, many stories without ever killing these characters (permanently anyway). And Fox Studios was behind Ratner’s body count all the way.

After Brian Singer dropped out, Alex Proyas was considered to direct X3 but turned it down because of disputes he had with the President of Fox back when Proyas made I, Robot. That makes sense. I, Robot is the kind of film where 80 percent is great and 20 percent is sloppy. Fix the 20 percent and the whole film would be great. It seems that the studio was too involved in Proyas’s film and made some poor executive decisions.

Kelsey Grammar is spot on as Dr. Hank McCoy (aka Beast). He’s believable as the Secretary of Mutant Affair and as Xavier’s old friend / student. When Mathew Vaughn was attached to direct the film, he hired Grammar as Beast and Vinnie Jones as Juggernaut. Jones is great but Juggernaut is underused, underdressed, and played too much for laughs. There’s no real dilemma when the mutants from the jail van (Juggernaut and Multiple Man) decide to join Magneto, but oh well.

Mathew Vaughn dropped out because he didn’t want to be rushed. Fox was already falling behind with the shooting schedule for X3. After the film came out, Vaughn stated, “I could have made something a hundred times better than the film that was eventually made…something with far more emotion and heart.” As the director of First Class, Vaughn will soon get his chance.

Jean Grey’s alter ego, the Dark Phoenix, is odd and inconsistent. She is potentially the most powerful mutant, yet she stands there watching the whole climatic battle unfold. For a being with unlimited freedom, she’s passive and doesn’t have much of a will- maybe she just wants to be left the hell alone. Only at the end, when Magneto is depowered, and the army starts firing upon her, does Dark Phoenix freak out and kill all the humans (and some mutants). Then Logan has to kill her because that’s the only way to “save her.” I’m glad this is the last stand, because Xavier’s school is seriously lacking in the leadership department.

I don’t know how I feel about the cure. The Dark Phoenix saga is a grand scale problem for mutants to solve apart from human interference and could have been the A story, while the mutant cure is the B story. I like that the cure is temporary (although this should have been explored with intention by the scientists and the government).

The Last Stand chooses the right scale for the battle. The fight on Alcatraz, the protesting, the individual choices all made sense. Combating the cure would be the collaborative mutant/ human effort. People like Magneto are pissed and rightfully so, and people like Storm want to ignore it entirely.

I like that Warren Worthington II funded the cure. His mutant son Warren III (aka Angel) was underused, but the connection was nice. If I could redo the trilogy I would have used Warren in part 1 with possible cameos in the sequels. Angel works well as an older mutant and the use of his character would have been a nice throw back to the original X-Men team of the 1960s. Warren is a millionaire and a possible funder of Xavier’s school. Where Xavier and the X-Men get their money from is unexplained in the films. Also, Stryker could have been used to transform Angel into Archangel, but I digress.

I liked the Omegas including Callisto and her ability to tell the power level of a mutant. She worked well with Magneto. Pyro was light; we never see his inner workings but we never really need to. Colossus and Kitty Pryde were fine. Overall, the supporting characters, including Multiple Man and Juggernaut, were mediocre. They served a story purpose but were executed in plain and (somewhat) uninteresting fashion.

A Jean centric story requires a better flesh out. As a child she’s able to lift cars like nothing but she doesn’t do any of that as an adult. There’s no reference to Xavier “caging the beast” in X2. I like that Jean is the perfect cross between Xavier and Magneto and encompasses both their abilities.

The X-Men uniforms were used in the right amount. The gang doesn’t suit up until the end, and by then you want them to look like a uniformed and organized team. Also, the leather helps in fighting and serves a practical purpose. I like the regular clothing throughout even though Storm became somewhat of a fashion icon. Storm used to be the conservative dressing teacher, now she’s rockin a makeover.

I loved the moment early on with Scott. “Then pass through” Scott tells Logan before mocking him with “not everyone heals as quickly as you.” Xavier says that Scott is a “changed man.” There is an easier way to get rid of Scott without killing him off. Scott should have taken a leave of absence and visited his brother Havoc and his sister-in-law Polaris in Europe (or somewhere) while doing some X-Men work abroad. Storm and Hank can lead the X-Men for awhile. Instead, it’s implied that Scott drove his motorcycle all the way to from New York to British Columbia to mourn Jean.

X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE (2009) [C+]

Note: Wolverine is the vampire of mutants. He can heal, live a long time, and is a sometimes-killer with a dark edge, and a mysterious past. Flashbacks are a great part of vampire stories. Like Logan, some vampire stories (Bill from True Blood, the Salvatores from The Vampire Diaries) begin during the Civil War era where the past of these well lived characters are best told in “extended flashbacks.” An origin story of Bill told in “real time” would not be very effective. Unlike Logan, Cyclops is a difficult character to make real in the vampire universe. The selling point for Cyclops is Scott Summers. The man underneath needs to be compelling.

Cyclops would work fine in the Star Trek universe which contains stories of mind control, split personalities, and alternate realities- stories that act like weak links in the X-Men films.

The main problem with X-Men Origins: Wolverine is the directing. Gavin Hood is too inexperienced with the genre and subject matter to make an emotionally dramatic and compelling film about mutants. Even after the financial success of X3, Fox was reluctant to spend a lot of money, so they short-changed the prequel and got a director on the cheap. I am, however, greatly looking forward to Darren Aronofsky directing the Wolverine sequel.

The origin “story” itself is great. It has a strong structure, lots of characters and interesting plots, a plethora of comic book mythos but a really poor execution. It was campy, half-hearted, sloppy, and overstuffed. The film could have been great in another director’s hands, and with some script/story revisions.

I think that the extended flashback structure (similar to Batman Begins) would have helped the film. Begin with the young James and young Victor and segue into the “we fought in all the major wars” montage. But let these scenes breath a little. Maybe have a younger actor play Logan and Victor for the Civil War scene; maybe style their hair a little different to show some evolution. Chris Nolan is skilled at letting his scenes breath, and so was Superman (1978) director Richard Donner. In these origins, the hero isn't even seen until 40 minutes (give or take) into the film.

After the opening, flash to Logan later in life- it can be a “post Weapon X” Logan, or a “post I-quite-the-X team” Logan. In the first example, the director would draw out the scene where naked Logan wonders onto the farm of the elderly couple and stays for a time. This film lacked what all origin stories need, an elderly man/mentor of guidance and stability. If this couple was established as that, then their death would have mattered more. Or even better, don’t kill the couple. The killing was done predominantly for shock value and it would have been heartfelt to show Logan jumping in front of a bullet or saving their lives instead.

The problem with Logan’s adamantium graphing scene is that we’ve seen it before and we’ve seen it better. As an extended flashback, the scene could have a better edit. Logan’s Weapon X test is like a child birth scene, we don’t need to watch it in detail to know what happens. Show us the important stuff, the before and after.

Side Note: In Wolverine, Stryker makes a big deal out of abandoning the Weapon X base for good due it being “compromised.” So why not give Stryker a different base in X2?

Advice Number Two: Cut needless characters. Chris Bradley (played by Dominic Monagham), the Blob, and Emma Frost could have been lessened, omitted, or altered.

I heard complaints about Kayla Silverfox, but the character story was fine for me. The important dynamic with her is that her relationship with Logan is real and organic. There was some confusion about how long she’d been working for Stryker and that if she knew that she had to fake her own death why did she act scared when Victor approached her car? Unthoughtful filmmaking aside, these inconstancies are easily explained.

What’s not explained is why Emma Frost is her sister- better to not have Emma Frost there at all. Logan is motivated to help the prisoners escape because he’s a good person, not simply because Kayla asked for his help. I like the plan of Victor “killing” Kayla to motivate Logan to join the Weapon X project. This was a good demonstration of Stryker’s intelligence.

Wolverine could have been called X-Bros. The mutant bromance between Logan and his teammates was a welcome contrast- this is what the film needed to capitalize on. It’s a shame that Logan and Victor’s falling out wasn’t more fleshed out.

The friendship between Logan and teleporter John Wraith (played by Will.i.am) worked well. The real chemistry, though, was between Logan and Remy LeBeau (Gambit). This dynamic was missing from the other films. Logan is the warrior, the Han Solo of the X-Men. He has a busy past and it makes sense that somewhere on his journey in X2 or X3 he would call up an old friend (maybe on his way back from Alkali Lake). For what he was given, Gambit nailed his part. He worked in the story well and his fight with Logan was not too over-the-top or over done like so many of the comical fights in Wolverine. Side Note: Logan being afraid of flying was overplayed, it was funny in X2, but it was annoying here.

Young Scott Summers worked fine. He helped orient the film time wise and marked the beginning of Xavier’s X-Men. He was a tad old for the part, the last act of the film is supposed to take place in the late 1970s, but this isn’t a big deal because his scenes were well done. I was ok with the Xavier cameo but it should have happened OFF THE ISLAND- being on the island put Xavier too close to the action which clutters the story.

Then there’s Deadpool, an interesting character who worked 60 percent of the time. I liked that he was there but he needed more depth and more of a story. BTW, I liked Stryker’s method of controlling Deadpool through the computer program and not with a chemical like he used in X2. In short, Deadpool’s origin should have been more like the comics. A summary from wiki below:

“Wade Wilson was dying from cancer when the Weapon X program offered him a chance for a cure. Undergoing procedures which attempted to recreate the healing factor of Weapon X (aka Wolverine); Wilson's cancer went into overdrive, scarring him externally and neurologically. Wilson was left in a near-catatonic state; he was deemed a failure and was sent to a facility where rejects of the Weapon Plus program were locked away. While there, he became the subject of betting among the other inmates in what was known as the dead pool. In this game, the inmates gambled on whom the warden would kill next; Wilson had been chosen as a test subject for the warden's various experiments and was given high odds for death. Wilson survived, however; eventually the healing factor manifested itself and, though still scarred and insane, he mustered enough lucidity to escape. Wilson thereafter used his abilities to become a renowned - if unstable - mercenary, taking the name of Deadpool to reflect the odds that he beat.”

Last note: X1 has the best first act, X2 has the best second act, and X3 has the most appropriate climax. Somewhere in this X-Men trilogy is a really good film.

Caleb S Garcia

March 13, 2011

The Strip Club

2011-03-13T20:28:00.000-07:00

My name is Clive Henderson. I am 25 years old. When I was 23, I went to my first Strip Club. It was called Xposed and located in the San Fernando Valley, the porn capital of America. I had seen the billboards around town: XPOSED, FULLY NUDE, OFF ROSCOE AND CANOGA. I stopped by after work. Going to a strip club had been on my mind. It was one of those things I had to try, like pot. I remembered hearing on a sitcom that “a bro never wears jeans to a strip club.” This made sense considering the grinding, so that morning I wore my dress slacks and a dress shirt.

It was a Friday afternoon around 6 PM. I found parking and walked right in. There was a ten dollar cover. The website didn’t mention this, but I anticipated such. I was surprised that they didn’t check for I.D. I figured that 21 would be the age requirement or 18 if the place didn’t serve alcohol. To my surprise, Xposed was such a place- no alcohol, just a really straight forward peep show. I thought that meant more money for me to save, but it didn’t. I saved on one thing, only to spend on another.

The place was empty. Give or take a few people, there were four to six customers throughout the night, all male of course. Strobe lights and spot lights lit the room. There was a bar that served Red Bull and soda across from an area with comfy movable chairs and small tables. The stage had two poles and was lit with different colors. Club music blasted from surrounding speakers.

At first I sat off to the side. I was stunned to see the naked breasts of the stage dancer. One by one, each woman got their dance on. Each time a woman would dance for a few minutes, then go through a bead-covered doorway and return with her top off to dance a couple more. The men who sat near the stage got an up close view of the girl. The strippers would occasionally swoop backwards and whisper something in the man’s ear. This was free of course, but it was custom for the man to leave a few dollars on stage.

When I moved to a closer chair, I was greeted by a girl named Marie. She was stripper from Cuba who lived in Florida most of her life before moving to the Valley a few years ago. She looked about 24, I couldn’t really tell. She was a petite woman- black hair and dark skin with medium-small breasts. She sat next to me and placed her hand on my arm and her leg on my thigh. She was sweet as expected. She pinched the cheeks on my face and told me I was adorable.

I realized now why strip clubs are the money droppers they are. I was prepared to buy a drink or two but not to pay 150 dollars for a VIP lap dance. I didn’t pay for the latter, this and more were simply the offers Marie made to me as she sat ever so close. On the more affordable end, there was a 20 dollar topless lap dance, and a 60 dollar lap dance that was topless and bottomless. I don’t see how bottomless is worth an extra 40, but I guess it is for some people.

If a customer denies the woman for anything extra, then she leaves him alone and he watches the stage. If it was more crowded that night, Marie, if that is her real name, probably would have given up on me. I agreed to the 20 dollar dance, and told her that I would have to do that other stuff next time. For now I just want to check out the scene.

She led me by hand up a ramp to a long room with many booths. She sat me down, and I gave her the money. I’m convinced now that I gave her more than 20. The guy at the door gave me back all ones for change. I gave Marie two fives and all my ones but I knew I had more ones that were already in there.

I didn’t realize the lap dance would only be three minutes, but it was one of the best three minutes of my life. She explained that it was ok to touch everything but the private areas. She took my hand and moved it on her leg and on her chest. She guided my fingers in between her breasts. She was particular about this. The breasts must be off limits. I asked her about that afterwards but she didn’t answer. I guess you can’t be too careful as a stripper. There are a lot of creepy guys out there that you don’t want touching your sensitive pillows.

A strip club is one of those places that begs the question: is it worth it? The answer is different for everyone. A guy with a hot girl friend could get for free what I got for 30 bucks, and then some. Indeed, the strip club appeals to a specific demographic, and is one of the most unnecessary of expenses. The expense is the main caution for a single guy. It’s easy enough to justify the occasional 30 bucks, but what if it was more?

I thought about the desires of men. I adore female company beyond the sex. A guy like me could go on coffee dates with women, talk till the cows come home, and save his left over money for the infrequent strip club visit. I imagine that some people treat themselves to strip clubs the way people treat themselves to massages or day spas. I left Xposed with a grin on my face. It couldn’t be moved. Strip clubs, if nothing else, boost happiness and confidence on a very primal level. I don’t like being parted with my money, but man what an experience to part with it on.

Caleb S Garcia
March 4, 2010

The Essential Woman: Roxy Astemborski

2011-03-02T21:45:00.000-08:00

Being around Roxy is intoxicating. She’s a gorgeous, half-Persian bombshell- out of my league, but thankfully in my orbit. When our paths did align, and we had one of our special conversations, I recognized that her personality is brave, independent, and extraordinary.

During her first visit to Costa Rica, we would infrequently Google chat. My uninteresting conversation skills would have prompted most women of her caliber to close the door. But Roxy is never one to close a door when the faintest chance of opportunity lingers in the distance. Instead, she asked if I ever wanted to go vineyard hopping with her during a hypothetical visit to wine country. Nothing came of this conversation, but the offer was a window to a unique individual. We had one other phone conversation, and occasional Facebook exchanges, before connecting in person nearly two years later. It was on my trip to Texas in December of 2009 where I learned a great deal more about Roxy Astemborski.

Roxy and I met in Westlake, CA- she was going to Pepperdine University and I grew up in the area. Roxy’s mom, at age 17, was the first of her family to move from Persia to America. She moved to Pennsylvania for school and married a white guy soon after. They had three kids. The first two were boys- they are 10 and 11 years older than Roxy. By the time Roxy was born, the family, motivated by the matriarch, moved to Arizona where Roxy was born on September 12, 1985. Roxy’s formative years in the Grand Canyon state were cut short when her parents relocated the family to Woodland Hills, CA. Roxy’s aunts followed and became California girls, Kardashians in their own right- Calabasas luxury at its finest. Roxy’s brothers continued living in So Cal, while Roxy and her parents moved to Hurst, Texas for her father’s work.

In Hurst, Roxy went to middle school and high school. For all intents and purposes, this is where Roxy grew up. As a virtual only child, she was happy for a friend. Roxy, a lovely girl who loves people, just sort of found herself with quasi-boyfriends. Thus, Roxy dated off and on but nothing serious- until she met Landon. Landon was a first-love infatuation somewhere between a Nicholas Sparks novel and the John Hughes film Pretty in Pink. They were good friends who made a fine couple. But Landon came from a wealthy family and his parents wanted him to associate with a similar crowd. Roxy was the “other,” thanks to her dark skin, curvy figure, middle class upbringing, and tom-boy personality. Landon’s parents were not thrilled.

Raised in a well off, Christian family, Landon, after high school, went to Pepperdine in Malibu, CA. A long-distance relationship was not a reasonable option for Roxy, so she applied to Pepperdine as well. Being a studious dork and academic achiever paid off and Roxy got in. At Pepperdine, the two dated but the invisible influence of Landon’s parents was always present- the old man and woman were oddly involved in their son’s life. Sophomore year, Roxy decided to study abroad in France for the whole year. Against the backdrop of a rocky relationship (and Roxy being the catch that she is), Landon had a dilemma. He chose to go to France with his girlfriend, of course.

Living in France was a dream come true for Roxy. A novice in French, she took all her classes in the land’s native tongue- mastering the language while maintaining a strong GPA. And Roxy didn’t live in school housing. Wanting something more authentic to French life, she lived with a host family, two actually. The first household was filled with elderly snobs- they hated noise and had persnickety regulations. Fed up with the cold treatment, Roxy transferred from the cobblestone hum-bugs to a delightful village home. Here, she had full access to the fridge and her own entrance to a room in a high, Repunzel-style tower.

Roxy had an idea. With a daily food allowance of 10 dollars (or whatever they use in France), Roxy ate on the cheap and used the money she saved (as well as her own money) to go on an extensive Euro trip. London, Paris, Italy, Germany twice, and a whole lot more, Roxy was getting her travel on- sometimes alone, and sometimes with Landon.

The tourist returned to Pepperdine for her junior year. She was still with Landon but the drama went on-he could not shake the parental hand from afar. Roxy threw herself further into campus involvement: a full load of courses, tutoring, nanny jobs, and adventures to L.A. cities for internship possibilities. Junior year was also the year of a drawn out break up. She wasn’t bitter that she and Landon broke up; just that she had to pull the plug. At this point, she was already friends with a guy named Matt, a gentlemen she introduced to Landon in hopes that they would be friends. And they were friends; of course having a girlfriend in common strained the bromance.

Roxy and Matt began dating and senior year they moved in together in a near-campus apartment I had the pleasure of visiting. The two worked as friends, and they were suitable roommates, but it become evident that a romantic relationship was not in the cards. Roxy had a lot on her mind. The last year of college comes with the looming question of what lies ahead. To stay in CA?, to travel the world?, to return home? Eminent questions, all of them.

Roxy graduated in June with a double major, Business and French. Her passions, though, were not in business but in the arts, in travel, in fiction- and her passion was on fire. Roxy and Matt continued as a couple after their graduation- he stayed at Pepperdine to pursue his Masters. At the same time, Roxy landed the gig of all gigs; she became the nanny for James Cameron’s three children. The gig with the famous Hollywood director’s kids lasted four months. While the money was good and the lifestyle in his million-dollar, Santa Barbra home was nice, the task consumed Roxy’s life and she felt incarcerated. There was more Roxy wanted to do, so she hung up her hat and planned the next step: she said goodbye to Matt and returned to Texas.

And those were the college years. Roxy has remained in Texas since. She told me more of her story, the adventures that followed, but I never wrote it down- I emphasized the college years. Roxy went to Cuba three times. The first trip was a month or so; the other two were a couple of months. She painted, drank, and explored the exotic surrounding. She cried and soul searched. She danced, swam, laughed, and loved.

Roxy met some interesting men post college. One was a wealthy and fit Cuba native who liked to scuba dive. Another was an older gentleman she reconnected with, a fitness trainer who gave her a car. There was the truck driver that she moved to Florida with for a brief time before going back to Cuba with him. And now there’s Jordan- her Texas sweetheart. It’s funny how that high school boyfriend way back when who seemed like “the one” ends up being “the first one.” The road to true love is an important road for Roxy. There’s a lot to love- loving yourself, loving your life, loving what you do, your calling, loving others, and loving that special someone.

Why is Roxy an essential woman? She has spunk. She’s not satisfied with the mundane. She visualizes the life she wants and she finds a way to make it happen, step by step. I look at the life she’s lived thus far and it looks like part one of a much greater story. Watch out world, Roxy’s second act upstages the first. She’s gearing up for it now and fans like me look on with affection.

Caleb S Garcia

December 22, 2010

V. Diaries 2.16 "The House Guest"

2011-03-01T00:27:00.000-08:00

Katherine is the house guest. Great opening, it threw me for a loop. Damon chokes “Elena” thinking its Katherine, but Damon turns out to be right, it was Katherine. On twin duty, Nina Dobrev is keeping up the acting chops, well done.

Stefan and Elena go to school (boo, Stefan at school). Elena gets jealous that Kat is living with the Salvatores; your petty moods bore me Elena. Kat is afraid of fire but she really shouldn’t be. She may be regaining her strength, but she’s still older and stronger than Damon. Kat hanging around reminds me that Kat and Elijah cannot occupy the same space. They are too evenly matched, and it’s too many vampires, one of them has to be MIA.

Alaric and Elena talk about telling Jenna the truth. I agree with them, Jenna’s ignorance is a drag. Alaric makes the right decision- he can’t be with Jenna if he’s going to keep things from her. Damon is still pissed at Kat. Forget about whether or not Uncle John knew if the dagger would kill Damon, Kat definitely knew. That’s an odd rule though because the dagger has to stay in the vampire for him to stay dead…hmmm.

The girls hang out, then Jenna joins and it’s a little awkward. “Is this some disguised attempt to cheer me up?” Geeze Jenna, conceited much? Jonas and Luka devise a cool little plan. Luka mentally travels to the Salvatore house and moves around like an invisible spirit. His plan is to remove the knife and resurrect Elijah, he fails.

Damon is really determined to read some books. Good for you Damon. I like seeing him in determined, on-a-mission mode. It’s nice to see the brothers getting along. Luka fails because Kat sees a moving dagger. Ghost Luka stabs Kat and Damon lights him on fire with a flame-thrower. Luka dies. It’s a sad way to go, but we say it coming. Come witch or werewolf, if you cross a vampire, you’re gonna get it.

The gals check out a band at the Grill. There’s some ex drama, etc. Elena makes a good point that sometimes lying to people to protect them hurts them more. So Caroline gets on stage, compels the lead singer, and goes country strong for Matt. Candice Accola looked great and sounded good. Her conversion to being fully CW is now complete.

“Red Riding Hood” looks kinda good and I love Amanda Seyfried, I’ll have to check it out. Anyways, Kat revels that she made a deal with Elijah. She could only save one and she chose Stefan. Now Damon is even more pissed. The whole “choose one” ploy is arbitrary and unneeded but whatevs. Bonnie tells Elena that she wants to date Jeremy and Elena approves. Jeremy gets his mocha on.

An angry Dr. Martin goes to the Grill. He’s after Elena; he wants the doppel as a gambling chip. Stefan, Caroline, and Elena devise a plan. Jonas starts a fire. He’s fights off Blondie, Matt intervenes, and then Jonas stabs Matt in the neck. We all know where this is going. To save his life, Caroline feeds Matt blood. It’s the risk every superhero must take. When a healed Matt wakes up, Caroline tells him the truth. In response, He freaks out and bolts. He connects some interesting dots about Vickie. Good memory Matt, I forgot she was your sister. Side note: I wonder if having vampire blood in his system makes him more paranoid.

Jonas shows up at Elena’s house and attacks “Elena” but it’s really Kat and Kat wins. In a moment of redemption, Jonas has a final burst of energy which he uses to give Bonnie her powers back and tell her a message: Bonnie is now the only witch who can stop Klaus. She must harness the power of all those dead witches at the burial ground.

Elena and Kat still hate each other- typical love square drama. Alaric says that he can’t reveal things to Jenna about Isobel. It was a great set up. Kat flirts with Damon but D-Dog is a stud. He denies the kiss. We got other rooms in the house bitch, go get one. Denied, Kat loves it though. We end on a great little cliff hanger. Isobel, Elena’s bio mother, shows up. Dun, dun, dun.

Caleb S Garcia

February 28, 2011

Just Go With It (2011)

2011-02-21T10:21:00.000-08:00

Maybe I was just in the right place in the right time and in the right mood, but I thoroughly enjoyed Just Go With It. It was the perfect comedic story. Adam Sandler plays a likable guy, more so then his other films. Even though he uses a wedding ring and pretends to be married, we like him anyway. His approach isn't slimy, his stories are sympathetic, he doesn’t act like a womanizer, and all the sex happens off camera. He meets Brooklyn Decker and thanks to the male gaze at its finest, we root for Adam because she’s the ultimate prize. She’s sweet and pretty and represents a challenge. After one night on the beach together, she finds his ring, gets mad, and he has to start from scratch to win her affections.

The film goes from a one night stand to an over-the-top courting ritual. Adam hires Jennifer Aniston to be his pretend-wife so he can show Brooklyn that he’s getting a divorce (later on the kids get pulled into the scam too). The brilliant part about the Adam/Jen relationship is that there’s no prior history of them as anything more than co-workers. They don’t hate each other, they don’t really like each other- they are amused by each other, and let each other be. Jen is divorced with two kids, she’s Adam’s assistant at a plastic surgery place in Beverly Hills and she’s busy with her own life. The banter between Adam and Jen is superb. They’re like old friends, nothing is serious, Adam is spending all this money to bribe everyone but the guy is loaded and he kind of deserves it for asking these outrageous favors and pulling this crazy scam. Jen has no reason to be jealous or hurt that Adam is going after Brooklyn. Jen thinks that it’s all a bunch of silly shenanigans and she’s pretty much right.

There’s a moment in the film when the male gaze switches to the female gaze. Adam is in the pool teaching the son how to swim. As the kid swims to Nick Swardson, Brooklyn and Jen’s faces light up- both see Adam as good father material. From this moment on, it’s too easy. Jen begins falling for Adam and the comedy takes a back seat for sweetness. Thanks to Nicole Kidman as Jen’s long lost “frenemy,” Adam and Jen share a contrived moment where they say what they like best about each other. The moment is too mushy for its own good but it does get Adam to admit that Jen is the only woman he’s never lied to.

At this moment (as well as seeing Jen in a two-piece), Adam begins falling for Jen as the one who completes him. Here’s what I know about film- the female gaze will never be as effective as the male gaze. A woman chasing a man is never as interesting as a man chasing a woman. Call me sexist, but this is the way it is. Jen starts to flirt with Adam a little bit but her character still works because she has a life and two kids and she needs Adam to know what he wants. The two have a great, late-night phone conversation where Adam says “I guess we had a moment,” and Jen says “well, guessing isn’t good enough for me right now.” She then says “you’re a big boy, you can do what you want.” [I paraphrase] It was a strong moment that set up the ending.

The movie ends in a remarkable way. The film is loosely based on the 1969 film Cactus Flower which was written by I.A.L Diamond who wrote Some Like It Hot in 1959. I’m a big fan of Some Like It Hot and it’s no wonder the story of Just Go With It works so well. Ok, so any comedy where the plot is built on lies has to end with the truth being revealed, otherwise we wouldn’t like or root for the characters as much. Sometimes this works well, sometimes I roll my eyes because it’s predictable and boring.

In Just Go With It, Jen already knows all of Adam’s secrets so the audience isn’t dragged down by a big dramatic confession scene. The only confession is between Jen and Nicole Kidman because Jen and Nicole lied to each other about the positive nature of their respective relationships. Adam tells Jen that he doesn’t want to marry Brooklyn and that he wants to be with her. Then we flash-forward to Jen and Adam’s wedding. Brooklyn was a plot device from square one. Adam is never shown confessing to Brooklyn the way Tony Curtis confesses to Marilyn Monroe in Some Like It Hot because there’s no need. All we see is Brooklyn on the plane and a voice over about how she met a tennis player on the plane which is a reference to her real-life, tennis-playing husband Andy Roddick.

The drama is light in Just Go With It and that works. Adam had his fun with Brooklyn for a while but found that Jen was better. No one was hurt- no harm, no foul, and everyone got a great vacation out of it. It also helps that Adam is loaded. Also, Nick Swardson was hilarious as Adam’s close friend Eddie. The ensemble worked pretty well- even Dave Matthews as Nicole’s husband was amusing. If you like Adam Sandler comedies at all, you will dig this hilarity. [B-]

Caleb S Garcia
February 18, 2011

V. Diaries 2.15 "The Dinner Party"

2011-02-18T14:20:00.000-08:00

Great episode- lots of twist and turns and the plot moved forward. “The Dinner Party” is a season highlight [A-], and unlike past episodes with an arbitrary meeting place for characters, Damon’s dinner party was a sensible method for trapping Elijah into a death trap. Why Uncle John insists on showing up when nobody likes him is beyond me but Elijah and Alaric make up for it. “Guess who’s coming to dinner” indeed.

The period-piece flashbacks on The Vampire Diaries are a treat. Vampires are called “night demons” and Jonathan Gilbert, in the opener no less, is attacked (and eventually killed) by Stefan Salvatore- this is a big deal. Stefan looks sweet in his evil, bloody, Civil War get-up.

Damon drops a line early on. He tells Stefan “I’ve become you” in reference to being careful. This idea that the brothers became each other is a repeated theme. Stefan was Damon before Damon was Damon, and Damon used to be the “good guy” who helped people. The difference, we will see, was a friendly vamp named Lexi. Side note: Notice that Stefan often soaks up the sun while Damon is rarely in the sun.

I like Alaric, he’s a good guy. In a way, he can do better than Jenna. In fact, Alaric’s obsession with Jenna brings his coolness factor down several notches. Jenna needs to know about all the supernatural stuff or she needs to stay out of it because what she’s doing now is too annoying. Or she can die, there’s always that. Later on when Alaric stabs Elijah, he tells Damon to get Elijah’s body out of there before Jenna returns- or Damon could compel to forget.

There’s an eye brow raise that Bonnie does that’s very meaningful. Luka confronts her and Jeremy stands up and tells him to back off. Then Bonnie raises her eyebrow. She was turned on and she was also sending a message that what Jeremy did was ok. She is with him to the point where he can play that part in her life. I loved the moment and that Jeremy got that reaction out of her. Pay attention to body language. There are two groups of people who know a lot about body language. The first group is women; the second group is men who are good with women.

Stefan: To say we have a difference of opinion is the understatement of the century. (He was a little hard to understand)

Overall, this episode’s dialogue is great- thank you Andrew Chambliss for the writing and Marcos Siega for the directing. I loved the moody piano playing as Stefan feeds on the ladies-and the great use of lighting and super-speed.

Damon keeping Andie around works for me. There’s no real reason for her to be there but she’s another human, another female, and, as a reporter, she’s knowledgeable. She’s a good little assistant for Damon and she proves that he likes female company. I don’t know the effects on long-term compelling but Andie seems to be getting along fine.

Stefan meets Lexi who stays the night at Stefan’s because “with dawn coming, beggars can’t be choosers.” It’s nice that all the flashbacks with vampires take place at night- they didn’t have magic rings back then. Lexi shows Stefan the light, a better way of life.

Lexi: Once you can hurt, you can love. Love, Stefan, that’s the point. Everything is intensified when you’re a vampire. When we hurt, we really hurt. But when we love...

And at that point, Stefan knew he wanted to love, he knew he needed to change. This story turned Elena into a fighter (she was already a lover).

So Jeremy and Bonnie hang out and work on some spells. Bonnie wants to make sure that Elena is ok with her dating Jeremy. It’s a bull shit answer but it reflects a truth- Bonnie’s just not that into him- keep trying Jer.

The dagger and the ash work for me. It’s a plausible and worthwhile MacGuffin. I like the twist that a human has to use it because there is honor among vampires. And I loved that Alaric wrote the message to Damon- Elijah has exceptional hearing. I also enjoyed how the dagger has to stay in the Original for him to stay dead- this made for a fantastic set up. This episode nailed suspense.

Elijah shows up at Dr. Martin’s- this ties in the A story with the Bonnie story- and Dr. Martin goes to Elena’s to find something for a locator spell. When Dr. Martin sees Bonnie and Jeremy, he uses the force to pin Jeremy against the way while depowering Bonnie as revenge for hypnotizing Luka.

At the lake house: Elijah picks up rocks and blasts the door down (it was the quarter throw part 2). This scene is tricky so here it goes. Damon was there the whole time and he’s being quiet. Elena and Stefan are acting and Elijah knows they are there. Elena threatens to become a vampire and thus no longer a human doppelganger. “Stefan won’t let you die,” Elijah says, calling her bluff. WRONG. The real bluff is that Stefan would never let Elena become a vampire. She would drink Stefan’s blood, heal, and then Stefan would keep an eye on her until the blood leaves her system. THIS IS THE BLUFF THAT ELIJAH SHOULD HAVE BEEN CALLING. Nonetheless the climax was great. Elena stabs herself, stumbles out and stabs Elijah with the special dagger. This time they keep the dagger in him.

Side note: You’d think an original might have found his way around the door thing but maybe not. I guess it’s just one of those things.

It seems that Damon regrets killing Lexi. He even has a flashback to when Lexi tells Damon not to hate. Hate leads to the dark side and all that. Then we get sexy time with Katherine in the shower. Damon takes a lot of showers too, so what’s the most economical thing to do?

Earlier on, when Damon talked to Elijah, we learned that in addition to the human doppelganger, the vampire, the werewolf, the moonstone, and the witch, to break the curse of the sun and moon you also apparently need to find the field where the witches who fled from Salem and settled in Mystic Falls in the 1690s were burned together on stakes. Too bad we can’t actually see this plan comes to pass. There’s no way this is going to have a worthwhile pay off but oh well.

Caleb S Garcia

February 18, 2011

The Millionaire Next Door (1996)

2011-02-15T14:07:00.000-08:00

The Millionaire Next Door: The Surprising Secrets of America’s Wealthy by Thomas J. Stanley and William D. Danko is a brilliant analysis of how the affluent came to be. The average millionaire is an elusive creature. He doesn't look like a millionaire, he doesn’t spend like a millionaire, he lives a modest, middle class life but make no mistake- he is a millionaire. His net worth is between one and ten million dollars. He has this in stocks, accumulations, and various investments. His annual income is below a million dollars, and he achieved millionaire status while making far below six figures a year. The average millionaire once sat where you sat and made what you made. In fact, anyone with a steady income can become affluent and financially independent- which is the whole point of acquiring net worth.

I admire T. Stanley and W. Danko for not being preachy. They never tells the reader what to do, they lead with examples. The Millionaire Next Door is a true story; it’s a plethora of testimonials- if it were a how-to guide it would be summed up as this: live way beneath your means. The book takes no moral stance, it makes no judgments, it doesn’t guarantee millionaire success in a “get rich quick” scam- it just reports the facts. This is my preferred method of learning- through story.

An example of their method- when asked if one should lease or buy a car, they answered, “More than 80 percent of millionaires purchase their vehicles. If and when more than 50 percent begin leasing, we will change our recommendation” (115).

I love how they argue. As a general rule, I am not fond of phrases that include the word “society” because the word is abstract and usually used with an unclear, negative connotation. For example, “society tells us what beauty is,” “society says that money buys happiness,” “society wants us to buy a lot of things.” What is society but a collection of people? I believe that the battle is not me verse society but me verse myself. What I like about The Millionaire Next Door, with its emphasis on personal responsibility, is that it side-steps the society phraseology and argues with specific examples.

For instance: “The popular media enjoy touting abnormalities in buying behavior. As a consequence, our youth are told that buying expensive items is normal behavior for affluent people. They are led to believe that the wealthy have a high-consumption lifestyle. They learn that hyper-spending is the main reward for becoming affluent in America” (35).

These claims are not outrageous or offensive and speak of an accurate, Western generality. The “popular media” of TV news, magazines, and websites report the spending sprees and large purchases of various public figures. To sell a product or entertainment news, it’s more effective to flaunt a 50 K Rolex around the wrist of Brad Pitt or see Jay Leno cruise by in a Jaguar XJ then to publicize the average buys of most millionaires. “Youth” refers to a specific audience; the implication is that they are (somewhat) impressionable. The youth observe a simple cause and effect - the rich spend - and the youth draw reasonable conclusions. Indeed, some of the wealthy have a high-consumption lifestyle and can afford it. The authors encourage the youth, and the readers, to look past the “hyper-spending” to a lifestyle of hyper-saving. While there is a time and place for spending in the short game, saving to achieve financial independence is the end game.

Admittedly, the downside to being frugal is frugality itself. But as Mrs. Rule suggests “there are worse things than budgeting, such as never being able to retire and never being financially independent; it is much easier to budget if you visualize the long-term benefits” (41). So how does one become wealthy? The Bible says “render onto Cesar’s that which is Cesar’s” (Matt. 22:21), but it doesn’t say “render onto Cesar that which is more than Cesar’s.” In short, the wealthy aim to “minimize [their] realized (taxable) income and maximize [their] unrealized income (or wealth/capital appreciation without a cash flow)” (55). This is the secret of the wealthy. Initiatives to “tax the rich” only work on hyper-consumers, and they are not typically millionaires. “Taxing the millionaire” falls flat because the tax is based on income and “in terms of income tax, most millionaires can transform themselves into non-millionaires” (61). In fact, some retired millionaires have doubled their net worth in (let’s say) a ten year period from age 65 to 75 without working a single hour. How much money does the tax man get? Zero.

T. Stanley offers a great summation: “Most millionaires measure their success by their net worth, not by their realized income. For the purposes of wealth building, income doesn’t matter that much…it matters less how much you make and more with what you do with what you already have” (60).

It’s true that the average millionaire owns his own business or private practice. He likes the freedom of being his own boss and answering to no one. The self-employed can make their own rules and have as many clients as they want. A lot of these businesses are in mundane industries- coal, produce, real estate, machine parts- not in luxury items. The path of being the self-made, entrepreneurial, business owner might not be the desire for you and that’s more than okay. Dr. Bill, for example, “was never cut out to be anything but a professor [and] he is not alone. Most people in this country are not the entrepreneurial type. But this does not mean that they can’t become millionaires” (137).
This is even true in affluent households. Most adult children with wealthy, business-owning parents don’t become business owners themselves. Money is second or third on their list of goals and achievements (207).

Financial security will reduce worry- a key component to happiness. But that labor of love, that fulfilling toil, that passion project, is a unique happiness that lies at the end of one's personal quest. As the authors suggest, don’t search for wealth- do what you love, and do it well, and money will find you- then save, invest, and multiple. The journey of amounting a small fortune begins with a single paycheck.

The Millionaire Next Door was an eye-opening read; it changed the way I look at life. It impacted my thoughts and values and gave new definition to what I consider ideal- independence in every facet of life: mental, emotional, physical, and financial. Of course, becoming independent doesn’t happen overnight, it's a journey of self-discovery and goal achievement. It's the tale of a boy who leaves to find his strength and returns to offer it. The path is lone, deliberately so, and forces to the individual to make it on his own. The boy is dependent, the man is not- the man fishes, the boy is given fish.

To my understanding, it is (somewhat) common in Eastern cultures for families to live with each other through adulthood. In the West, in immigrant-heavy America, and in this book, this is not the ideal. The ideal is detachment; the ideal is the romantic sail for sons and daughters. When women get married at a young age they often go from one form of dependency to another. This is not ideal. Through cautionary tales, the book speaks against the affluent father who encourages his daughter to be a housewife and not have her own career- or the father who continues supporting the daughter financially after she is married so that she “has money of her own.” She's allowed money of her own but not a career of her own, hypocrisy ensues.

There is a common effect on people who receive money they did not earn. Receivers of “economic outpatient care” can lose ambition, motivation, initiative, self-confidence, and independence. I’ve been there and I’m there now. I carry a cautionary tale- to not let financial support become all consuming, to not spend tomorrow’s cash today. While reading, I had a revelation in the form of Cheap verse Frugal. Cheap is buying low-quality items and mooching off people for higher quality items. Frugal is buying a quality item and not wasting it. A cheap person puts himself in situations he cannot afford, a frugal person does not. Being broke does not lead to cheapness but cheapness often leads to being broke. Frugal people are rarely, if ever, broke.

The Millionaire Next Door is a hopeful tale. It’s a collection of wisdom and principles that guide the reader to his life goals. And like any hopeful tale, especially an American tale (because after all, what's more American than financial freedom?), it doesn't matter where you’ve been, just where you're going. Like wealth, the journey to independence is blind and anyone can take it.

Caleb S Garcia

February 15, 2011

V. Diaries 2.14 "Crying Wolf"

2011-02-11T18:16:00.000-08:00

“Crying Wolf” has no obvious references to “The Boy Who Cried Wolf” but there were werewolves who died and werewolves who cried. This episode was a semi-conclusion to the werewolf arc. Jules and Tyler left town and the rest of the wolf pack is dead. “Retreat,” they cry, “retreat.” Elijah does not begin a job he’s not prepared to finish.

This episode begins a short time after the last one ended- a rarity on this show. Jules, Brady, and Stevie are cleaning up the remains of their friends and discussing the moonstone. Let me just say that the moonstone was a contrived plot point as is. Now we have an added dimension- if a werewolf breaks the curse first then he can turn (or not turn) at will, and if a vampire breaks the curse first then he can walk in the sun. I don’t like this leftfield addition to the rule. It shouldn’t matter who breaks the curse, especially if a werewolf, vampire, witch, and doppelganger are needed to break it, if it’s broken, it’s broken. Plus, seeing how witches have power over werewolves, maybe there’s an alternate way to make werewolves turn at will. Did anyone ask Bonnie to check that in the spell book?

The wolf pack fills Tyler in. He sees a picture of Katherine and identifies it as Elena. If Tyler had half a brain, he would have asked the wolf pack what they wanted with Elena. Instead, he goes along with their plan to ambush her at the lake house. And Stefan and Elena thought they were getting away for a peaceful weekend. Psssh.

The writers make a tremendous effort to make Stefan likeable. Continuing his ideal boyfriend routine, he is sensitive to Elena’s “moments,” he cooks, collects fire wood, pours her wine, and fulfills her sexual needs. Then Elena tosses Stefan a coat that belonged to her great-grandfather.

Elena: Here- Bundle up, it was my great-granddad’s…You look very hot in it.
Stefan [Confused]: I look hot in your dead great-granddad’s jacket?
Elena: Beyond hot.

You’re right Stefan that is a little weird. If I didn’t know better I’d say that Elena has daddy issues, granddaddy issues, and great-granddaddy issues. First, we have a lucky loophole in that, although Elena is adopted, her grandfather and great-grandfather are all who she thinks they are. Second, Elena’s memory of her great-grandfather is either non-existent or vague nostalgia. Hmm is this the same Civil War Jonathan Gilbert who hated vampires? We may find out next week. The point being- it was odd for Elena to say that.

Stefan and Elena also find a secret room with some weapons and journals- not much more to say there. As their evening progresses, they are attacked by werewolves. Tyler shoots Stefan with wooden bullets but then decides to help him. Elena stabs a guy and then Stefan rips his heart out! Ok, in the next episode Caroline better rip someone’s heart out (not to be confused with breaking a heart).

I don’t know why Elijah goes to the High Tea Party. I assume he’s in town to get the moonstone and keep an eye on people- how he achieves these tasks is beyond me. Damon “challenges” Elijah, but Elijah doesn’t want to talk (choke hold!). An original never compromises his terms. Uncle John and Alaric are also at this party. John doesn’t want Alaric shacking up at the house. Ummm…how does John have any say in what goes on in Jenna’s house? Plot clarification por favor.

Back at Damon’s place, Alaric gets stabbed and Damon gets knocked out with vervain. In their human form, the werewolves have found various ways to play on an equal playing field with the vampires (unless you’re a vampire named Elijah). Damon is tortured by Stevie. First Caroline, now Damon and Stefan, these werewolves like to play dirty. Then Elijah shows up in dramatic fashion (and with the moonstone). One by one the werewolves run at him, and one by one Elijah rips their heart out. It’s good to have a signature move.

Bonnie comes up with a great plan to make Luca confess secrets against his will; Jeremy and Caroline help her. Bonnie lights candles with her mind and has a little girl talk with Blondie. A hypnotized Luca reveals that Elena has to die to undo the curse and that Elijah is going along with it. Of course Elena already knows this and when Stefan finds out he’s not happy. “I’ve lived 162 years, so it’s ok if I die,” Stefan tells Elena, but if you die “that’s not heroic, that’s tragic.” Well said Mr. Salvatore- Elijah’s not the only one who is “careful with his words.”

Alaric wakes up because he has a cool ring. Then the moment we’ve all been waiting for: Jeremy and Bonnie kiss- even though she remembers him in that awkward, emo, drugie phase. I don’t expect much from this relationship, the drama would be uninteresting, but it’s nice that it happened. Ending on a somber note, Tyler leaves Mystic Falls. He makes his peace with useless character Matt, almost says good bye to Caroline, and then rides shotgun with Jules. Wolves travel in packs, even if it’s a pack of two.

Caleb S Garcia

February 11, 2011

V. Diaries 2.13 "Daddy Issues"

2011-02-07T16:50:00.000-08:00

[Note: Sorry this is late. I had technical difficulties with the DVR and it failed to record the show. The soonest I could find the episode online was Sunday night]

Elena has daddy issues to the third power. First, her birth parents give her up for adoption, then her adopted parents die in a car crash, then her birth father, John Gilbert- who she views as an uncle- returns, acts strange, and "dies." Elena is being raised by a juvenile aunt and lacks a male figure in her life… Stefan fulfills Elena’s absent father issues. Old soul that he is, Stefan is Daddy 2.0, a protective caregiver in the body of a young man- a fantasy fulfilled. – From my review of the 2.8 episode "Rose."

It’s like I predicted the future. I wrote about Elena’s Electra complex before an episode was named “Daddy Issues”- I’m ahead of the game. As a genre, vampire stories are Gothic- and a repeated theme in the gothic is daddy issues. Of course the Electra complex, pioneered by Freud and Jung, can involve the battling of “mother” for the attention of “father,” so Elena’s Electra complex might be closer to penis envy. At any rate, will John Gilbert’s return from the unknown allow Elena to tackle her issues with daddy? Let’s find out.

This was a kick ass episode. Written by Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec, the show’s frontrunners clearly know what they’re doing. If last week’s death of Rose was a bit too melodramatic for you, this follow up packs a punch and really kicks off the second half of Season Two.

Tyler confronts Blondie- he knows the truth. He gets angry, his eyes turn wolf- it can only get worse from here. Elena confronts John.

Elena: Why are you here?
John: I’m here to protect you and that’s all I can say.

Hmmm. Did Elijah hire John to protect Elena and her friends? We know he hired Martin. And correct me if I’m wrong. The last we saw was when Katherine stabbed John and left him for dead. Then John disappeared. Anyways, the John/Jenna conversation was horrible. Jenna says that John can’t stay at the house. Instead of “house” John thinks “town,” in which case it’s a free country so John can stay.

Moving on: Damon says to Stefan, “I may just have to get a hero hair-do of my own” – best line of the episode. Stefan and Caroline have a convo while Tyler and Jules have a convo. The vamps want to live together in peace while Jules, the lycanthrope, wants to live apart in peace.

[Side Note: What’s up with Elena’s ponytail?] Stefan talks with Tyler. During the convo, Jules calls Tyler, and Tyler screams “help” before Stefan can hang up the phone. This leads Jules to believe that Stefan has kidnapped Tyler, so Jules kidnaps Caroline to use her for trading. And apparently Jules can “tell when people are lying”- it’s one of her “wolf tricks.” And forget pepper-spray, Jules and company have vervain-spray and wooden bullets. John Gilbert, though, doesn’t seem to have anything (not even the magic ring), so John better watch himself.

Poor Caroline gets locked up and occasionally shot by Brady, Jules’ werewolf BF. Stefan is pissed. Good acting chops by Candice Accola. The showdown is great. The Salvatore brothers take on several opponents. There are flame-throwers, stake throwing, back flipping, at one point a guy jumps down from the trailer and Damon rips his heart out while he’s landing! Tyler does the right thing, he helps Caroline escape. But Jules puts a gun to Blondie’s head. Then Dr. Martin arrives- how he knew to go there we do not know. He casts a spell that gives people intense migraines. The vamps and Tyler are safe. Martin leaves Tyler with a message: Jules and Co need to get the hell out of Dodge.

Did anyone else sense that there was a sweet sibling bond between Stefan and Caroline? I did, it was very nice. Revelation: Isobel is trying to do something that will stop Klaus from going to Mystic Falls! John gives Damon a device that supposedly kills originals like Elijah. Is John for real? We really don’t know.

Tyler tries to apologizing to Caroline. She’s pissed- “they’re not friends anymore.” A sad Caroline is comforted when Elena and Bonnie join her for a slumber party. Elena and Stefan mouth something to each other- probably nothing important. So the episode begins with Damon in the shower and ends with him in the bath- that is one clean boy. He gets frisky and feeds off the news girl. Apparently, he’s still pining over Elena, but let’s just assume that Damon is confused and that he’s really pining over Rose.

Caleb S Garcia

February 7, 2011

V. Diaries 2.12 "The Descent"

2011-01-30T23:09:00.000-08:00

To paraphrase Seal, Damon receives “a kiss from a rose on the [grave].” The second half of season two begins on a somber note- the death of Rose. She doesn't just receive a stake to the heart either; she first descends into madness, losing her remaining humanity in the process. Her dying angst causes Damon’s descent. “You remain my power, my pleasure, my pain.” Damon cared for Rose, she was a source of pleasure, and he did (dare I say) love her, now she’s a source of pain.

But before we get there, let’s back up a touch. “The Descent” opens with naked people. “Got wood?” Now CW, is your tag line a double entendre? There’s Jules, who wakes up from her werewolf nightmare and kills a Sherriff, and Stefan who likes to work out at Elena’s place. Much to Elena’s chagrin (most things are), Stefan decides to take Katherine’s advice and track down Isobel. With Alaric’s help, Stefan later calls Isobel. We don’t know if he reaches her on his Droid. His call may have been dropped. Uncle John shows up at the end though.

Caroline is more awkward than usual; I guess that’s the character. She acts awkward around guys she likes. In this case she likes both Matt and Tyler so there are a lot of odd blonde moments. Come on Vampire Barbie, I thought we were past the passive bubbly. Bottom line: Matt is lame and Tyler is a more workable kind of lame. And he’s on to Blondie’s lies about there being no other vampires in Mystic Falls.

Elena “plays nurse” to Rose who throws out wisdom like, “the whole idea of family is not exactly compatible with being a vampire.” Then Rose’s decent begins; she says stuff like “tell them to prepare the horses.” She hacks, thinks that Elena is Katerina, attacks Elena (in a really good cat fight sequence), suffers dementia, and leaves to a school football game where its chow time. Damon brings Rose home, the worst is over, now her body is tired and her mind is drifting- it’s time to dream a dream. Borrowing a note from True Blood, the dream sequence fared better than it should have. I’m still a little unsure about how the dream works. I assume Damon could get inside the mind of a weakened Rose (Kat enters the thoughts of multiple vamps). Damon said was “controlling the dream.” The long haired, blue dress Rose was sweet. Averse to primary colors, Inception-Damon was skillful in easing Rose’s pain before his mercy kill. Staked, Rose meets the true death. Better then Mason’s death. Oh dear, how broken record of me.

Damon couldn’t be his usual protector self with an ailing Rose. In a way, this kills Damon the most. He’s used to having power, to being in control, but not here. Elena confronts Damon which angers him more- “I feel Elena, ok. And it sucks!” So Damon goes to a dark place. The victims are some passerbyers. Damon confesses: “This is who I am. I’m not human and I miss it, I miss it more than anything in the world. That’s my secret.” I can almost hear Damon singing Seal, “You became a light on the dark side of me.” Damon’s light is gone, only darkness is left. Damon returns to the shadow life. It really bites.

RIP: Twilight equivalent to Alice.

Caleb S Garcia

January 30, 2011

The Essential Man: Dennis Torres

2011-01-13T18:49:00.000-08:00

From his office, where the walls are glass windows, Dennis Torres overlooks the Pacific ocean. The view comes courtesy of Pepperdine University- a hill perched campus in Malibu, CA where Dennis is an adjunct business Professor and the Director of Real Estate Operations- he is also my mom’s boss. The story of the 68-year-old who earned a coastline view, is an inspiring adventure of modest living to multimillionaire. On a Friday afternoon, I joined Dennis in his executive office for a tale of discovery, mayhem, and Zen. He was dressed casual- jeans and a collared shirt. He ate a late lunch in a container brought from home. He embodied the warm hospitality of a grandfather, allowing familial access to his life story and human philosophy. Here’s a guy who made it, the question was how?

Although I know him as a mediator, arbitrator and negotiator, Dennis's law career didn't began until his early thirties- thus the first three decades of his life were filled with survivalist soul searching. Dennis was born in New Jersey to two middle class, American parents and one sibling, a sister. The child of a Jewish mother, Dennis grew up going to temple infrequently and has long considered himself a secular Jew. After high school, Dennis moved to New York and lived in the historic Chelsea Hotel while attending the Fashion Institute of Technology. He earned a degree in industrial engineering and worked as an engineer at a clothing manufacturing factory. Practical choices like these would become a theme in Dennis’s life. When Mr. Torres tired of the job, he moved back to the Garden State.

Dennis was a fan of motor vehicles. “This was the 1950s,” Dennis informed me, “Americans were obsessed with designing new cars that never ran as well as foreign made vehicles.” Getting behind a larger wheel, Dennis became a truck driver for the Teamsters Union- a powerful Mafia-like union run by notorious criminal and Union president Jimmy Hoffa (New Jersey was a main operating point). “It was the dirty money from these unions that built Vegas,” Dennis explained.

Then Uncle Sam came knocking, so Dennis dogged the Army draft by enlisting in the Air Force. The new G.I. spent three years fixing planes in Texas and North Dakota and a fourth year as a currier in Vietnam. Dennis’s basic training was put to the test. Gun in hand, bullets whizzing by, people he spent years with died around him. “Yes the U.S was trying to prevent the spread of Communism to southern Vietnam, but the Vietnamese didn’t care about the political views of the leader,” Dennis lamented, “they just wanted to farm, feed their families, and be left alone.” Dennis explained that although a Peace Treaty was signed to end the war, “58,000 Americans and five million Vietnamese lost their lives, Vietnam became Communist, and the United States lost the war.”

After Vietnam, Dennis needed to clear his head. He stayed with his parents who had relocated to Pasadena, CA a few years earlier. In need of a therapeutic retreat, Dennis sought to explore the Amazon Rainforest. He met a fellow crusader at a travel organization, and the two drove Dennis’s car through Mexico and Central America to the Amazonian Jungle of South America. Twenty miles outside Panama City, Dennis sold his car and used various means of transportation to get to Columbia. In South America, Dennis and friend spent six months living with nature, learning survival, and discovering joy in life’s essentials. Dennis slept on a hammock, avoided bugs, took cold showers, and met the occasional aborigine. He experienced life like a tribesman, developing a game-changing philosophy of detachment.

To return home, the two walked, hitchhiked, and rode the bus to Ecuador. The amigos joined a banana-hauling freighter as working passengers till they arrived in Florida. They parted ways in the Sunshine State, and Dennis journeyed up the coast, reuniting with an old fling in New York. After staying with her for a time, Dennis flew to Los Angeles where he got a job at a telephone company. Here, Dennis would warn people who failed to pay their bill that their service would be terminated.

Dennis quickly mastered the City of Angels. Now 27, Dennis wrote stories for an alternative 1960s magazine about musicians and artists. Soaking up the scene of the underground hippie rag, Dennis befriended Jim Morrison and The Doors as well as other up-and-coming rockers. Vietnam and The Doors, Dennis lived Apocalypse Now.

In 1969, Dennis married his wife Averi. In 1983, the couple founded the Angel Flight Charity, which provides air transportation for medically and financially needy people. Years earlier, the veteran used his G.I bill to earn his pilot’s license and taught flight school- air travel was close to his heart. Dennis attended Pepperdine’s School of Law and Straus Institute of Dispute Resolution where he earned a Master’s degree. He completed Harvard Law School's Program on Negotiation and has been with Pepperdine professionally since 1988.

Dennis’s Philosophy

For Dennis, life only exists in the moment; the moment is where life works best. The past is history, tomorrow’s a mystery, and it is counterproductive to worry about either- worry detracts from the moment. Dennis believes that your ego is for yourself, and that instead of only having desire for ourselves, we need to possess desire for other people. Reflecting on a 41-year marriage, Dennis explains that “love is where the other person’s happiness is more important then your own.” Making life better for another person gives great meaning to Dennis’s life. The formula for a successful couple is this: in the essentials, compatibility; everything else is complimentary. Dennis and Averi are opposites. He is a Zen minimalist, and she, as Dennis puts it, "came from a more upwardly financial family and was used to having more money." As a couple, the two complete each other.

Dennis's life pursuit is not pleasure, for pleasure can never be quenched, but joy. To attain joy, one must empty oneself of selfishness, and live a modest, simplistic life without attachment. Pleasure is the enemy when joy is dependent on attachment. “Freedom is the difference between addiction and preference,” Dennis concludes.

In his unusual, 30-year-running, schedule, Dennis wakes up after four hours of sleep, practices yoga and meditation, and reads numerous papers all before sun rise. Well versed in Eastern thought, Dennis draws a distinction between the phenomenal and the experiential. The phenomenal world is one of separateness because the mind and senses are always quantifying, categorizing, and separating intake. The experiential world is one of unity. In meditation, one seeks to shut down one's mind and one's physical sense of being- what is left is one’s essence or spirit. Dennis used to smoke cigarettes but after practicing meditation he no longer craved them. "I didn't give up smoking," Dennis explains, "smoking gave me up."

Dennis uses the Adam and Eve story to explain that “we are not our bodies, and we are not our minds, we are an essence.” The past, present, and future are ways for the mind to quantify time. When one ignores these arbitrary categorizations, one is left with the moment, the unity of time.

As a fan of rules, this rigid schedule works for Dennis. “We feel pain because we don’t understand the rules,” he says. Dennis has his own rules of behavior and conduct. The rules can be summarized as understanding over judgment, and helping others as fellow brothers. Dennis’s business advice, and the secret to his millionaire status, can be summed up as “live beneath your means”- it's the successful formula that lies beneath the Zen student's Forrest Gump fairy tale.

Caleb S Garcia

January 13, 2011

True Blood (Set Visit)

2011-01-12T23:10:00.000-08:00

HBO's "True Blood" is filmed in multiple locations. Located in Malibu Canyon, down Las Virgenes Rd., between Las Virgenes Cyn. Rd. and Piuma Rd., down a private driveway (and walking distance from my house), are a few of the show's sets including Bill's house, the Bon Temps Cemetery, Sookie's house, and Lafayette's house.

Season 1, Episode 8 of "True Blood" features Sookie's house, the graveyard, and Bill and Sookie sexy time. See the YouTube here.

Me at the graveyard.

Bill's house

Bon Temps Cemetery

BENEDICT TALLEY

BELLEFLEUR

FRANCIS EARL STACKHOUSE

JESSE EPHRAIM COMPTON

Sookie's House

Lafayette's house

TB = Doin bad things with you

Caleb S Garcia

January 12, 2011

The Biggest Loser (Set Visit)

2011-01-12T21:24:00.000-08:00

Currently in its 11th season, NBC's weight loss reality show "The Biggest Loser" films in Calabasas, CA. The camp is down Las Virgenes Rd. (toward the beach), left on Mulholland Dr, on the right hand side (walking distance from my house).

A gag reel of the show featuring the gym can be seen here.

Me in the gym of "The Biggest Loser"

Caleb S Garcia

January 12, 2011

TIME Letter

2011-01-10T21:43:00.000-08:00

Every issue of TIME Magazine features a section where readers ask questions to someone famous. I sent in a question to director Darren Aronofsky (Black Swan) and he answered.

See the Q&A at TIME.com here.

The video interview with the full question and answer is here.
The video is also available on YouTube.

I didn't ask the question as a fan. At the time I was somewhat bothered by the film. I asked as someone who analysis film. He dodged the answer a little bit. He wants the audience to feel something, and he was surprised to learn that people were having fun at the film. Like he said, the film is like a roller coaster but a roller coaster that's 75% incline and for someone who hates heights. He is a true auteur.

Caleb S Garcia
January 10, 2011

EW Letter (#1132)

2011-01-10T20:56:00.000-08:00

My third time being printed in Entertainment Weekly's letter section. They printed a quote from my letter. I haven't e-mailed them for (about) two years and when I did I sent them multiple letters.

"Our designation of Taylor Swift as Entertainer of the Year (#1132) was met with huzzahs ("Golden nails, golden hair, golden voice: Taylor Swift is our golden gal," crowned Caleb Garcia of Calabasas, Calif)"

Caleb S Garcia

January 10, 2010

Fill My Life Again

2011-01-10T11:39:00.000-08:00

It was a day of breakthroughs. In the morning I went hiking with my mom. The mountains were beautiful, the weather was cool, and the exercise did wonders for my physical and emotional health. When I returned, my friend Mike Dow asked if I could take him to the LAX airport. I was delighted to. It was a well-timed request because I already had plans to go to the Westside Vineyard Sunday night service for young adults- so I was going that direction anyway. I dropped off Mike and went to the church, perfect timing. I went for the worship, the teaching, and the YA group. I was craving on-fire, heartfelt worship, the kind of worship I experienced growing up in the Malibu Vineyard as well as at some Orange County churches later on. The opening set was great. One man singing and playing a guitar, what a voice, he was feeling the moment.

During the sermon about the Passion of Jesus in the book of John, I had an inspired thought: Reap and close. Seek closure to your reaping. Sow and reap as much as possible. I recently reaped blessings through EW, TIME, set visits and a meeting; now I need to write some blogs. Although I feel pressured to spend my time job hunting and networking, it is justified and even a good idea to write these blogs as it lends closure to my reaping. God gives you a gift and you enjoy the gift. The point of the gift is use, the use creates the closure. It is of the utmost important to receive- Dr. Murdock talks about this. The way to fully receive, which honors the act of receiving, is to have closure to the reception. This demonstrates appreciation and being a good steward. Gratitude is important because if you are thankful for something then you attract more of that into your life. So give thanks to the Lord, for all good things come from God.

After the message, a closing set of five or so worship songs were played. I got really into it. They asked people to come to the front if they wished, a way walking to towards God and asking for His help. I did, and as I knelled, I balled my eyes out, more than I thought I had in me. I needed the release of tears. The lyrics “Sweetly broken, wholly surrendered,” from the Jeremy Riddle song, spoke to me. I was living the song, the chorus. With a giant cross in front of me, I was knelling and weeping:

At the cross you beckon me

You draw me gently to my knees, and I am

So lost for words, so lost in love

I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered

I experienced the broken, now I need to wholly surrender- a way of saying, “ok God, I’m going to do it your way.” Seeking God, His people, His Word, His work, became a new priority.

The most powerful lyric that spoke to me was from the song “Mighty to Save.” The prayer “Fill my life again” became my prayer, a way of summing up my worries, fears, and what I wanted from God. I wanted God to save me from an empty life, where the emptiness is a haunting darkness. Only God knows how to fill my life again and give me exactly what I need.

The theme of surrender, and a reward system, was present again:

So take me as you find me

All my fears and failures

Fill my life again

I give my life to follow

Everything I believe in

Now I surrender

There was power in that prayer. After the music, I had someone pray for me. I explained a brief version of my story, my need for direction, joy, hope, open doors, and confidence. A woman prayed for me and I cried. Whenever I receive prayer, I am reminded of a church I visited in Canada many years ago. In a service, the pastor asked “Do you think praying and having people pray for you make you more likely or less likely to receive the blessings you want?” God wants us to ask Him for things, He encourages it.

Days earlier, my Grandfather sent me a letter with a passage from Oswald Chambers’ My Utmost for His Highest. It spoke to me in a powerful way:

The battle is lost or won in the secret places of the will before God, never first in the external world…Until this is done, I lose every time. The battle may take one minute or a year that will depend on me, not on God; but it must be wrestled out alone before God, and I must resolutely go through the hell of renunciation before God. Nothing has any power over the man who has fought out the battle before God and won there.

If I say, “I will wait till I get into the circumstance and then put God to the test,” I shall find that I cannot. I must get this thing settled between myself and God…and then I can go forth with the certainty that the battle is won.

The part about “I will wait till” was significant as it echoed a conversation I had with my grandfather. He was encouraging me to get more involved in the church and with other believers and I was making excuses that I plan to as soon I get some financial things figured out. He was right. My battle against circumstance must begin as a battle with God- where I speak honestly about my fears and wants and pray my heart unabashedly. This is the real battle ground. It is a challenge. Anytime I feel fear, anxiety, or worry I need to take it to God. Then the healing and deliverance process can really begin.

Caleb S Garcia
January 10, 2011

My Top 10 Films of 2010

2010-12-27T22:14:00.000-08:00

2010 is a poor man’s 2008. At a glance, the line-up is remarkably similar: films by Danny Boyle, David Fincher, Christopher Nolan, an Iron Man sequel, and a Pixar masterpiece. Bravo to these men for back to back hits. This Oscar season, there’s a good chance that 2008 Award-sweeper Danny Boyle (for Slumdog Millionaire) will switch places with David Fincher, who’s 2010 The Social Network has the critical acclaim edge over his 2008 epic Benjamin Button.

My Top 10 Films of 2010

1) THE SOCIAL NETWORK [A-]

[For my complete review go here.] For all intents and purposes, matters of Oscar quality, year individuality etc., The Social Network is the greatest film of the year. It’s the little film that could, the film that, at a first glance, people bet against. How could the incredible niche director David Fincher and legendary scribe Aaron Sorkin match their other work with a film about Mark Zuckerberg and the founding of Facebook? They didn’t find a way, they made a way. Jesse Eisenberg is superb- Andrew Garfield, Justin Timberlake, and Rooney Mara all do a bang up job delivering Sorkin dialogue. The film is about genius. Zuckerberg is a gray character- driven by obsession, a mind to be reckoned with. His path to becoming the world’s youngest billionaire is a fascinating character drama. Two years ago, Fincher was nominated for best director, this year he may take the cake- a win for Sorkin is not out of the question either. Bravo for the skill and brilliance of that Facebook movie.

2) TOY STORY 3 [A]

Thanks to Toy Story 3, the Toy Story series is the best quality trilogy next to The Lord of the Rings. The co-director of Toy Story 2, Lee Unkrich’s third installment is a masterful, tour de force- it’s a really big deal. The film is a milestone for Disney/Pixar and the world of animation and cinema. It was the first all CGI movie I saw in 3D IMAX and it looked incredible- crisp, clear, and gorgeous. The film grossed over a billion dollars worldwide, thus the media dubbed it “The Number 1 Animated Movie of All Time.” The animation improvement from 1995 is stunning, a real game changer- a worthy follow up to the epic Wall-E. The series has matured nicely, offering closure to an audience invested in these lovable characters- we know them, they are a part of us. The film never loses heart- it’s a heart wrenching story, a family journey, a moment of triumph. The little girl at the end tugs at the heart strings. And the film is fun- the jail break is a rockin escape thriller packed with laughs and genius- one of cinema’s greatest sequences ever. Toy Story 3 is a unique creature- the adventures of Woody, Buzz, Hamm, Rex, Potato Head etc- what a team, what a time. This is the unbelievable ending to Pixar’s magnum opus.

3) 127 HOURS [A-]

Two years ago, Danny Boyle’s Slumdog Millionaire swept the Oscars with 8 wins. 127 Hours is a smaller, more personal film but a work of skill and beauty nonetheless. In 127 Hours, thrill-seeker Aron Ralston gets his arm stuck by a boulder while rock climbing and has to cut it off. Based on the true story, the film drags the audience through every possible emotion- including moments of terror and tear-jerking moments of victory. The film is very intense, dramatic; sometimes hard to watch, but also sweet, uplifting, and mindful. The film is an underdog story to tell- Boyle makes a simplistic plot fascinating by narrowing in on the mind and heart of Aron. James Franco gives a career changing performance as the fated climber. The fact that the audience knows that the film will have unpleasant scenes does not take away from the end result. Boyle knows this well, and rewards the audience. Unlike Black Swan, which was a difficult theater experience, Boyle, who takes the risk of making a onetime watcher, delivers the most moving of stories- the triumph of the human spirit.

4) SCOTT PILGRIM VS THE WORLD [A-]

Scott Pilgrim is the underrated, superb film of 2010. Director Edgar Wright does, in my opinion, his best work to date. He takes the same artistic, quick editing, creativity behind Hot Fuzz and combines it with comic book, sucker punch ingenuity. In short, the film is revolutionary- a real game changer, nothing like Scott Pilgrim has quite been done before. In the film, Scott (Michael Cera) must defeated seven evil exs to win the affections of Ramona. A superb cast, Cera is an appropriate dork-hero, Ramona is a worthy dream chick, and Chris Evans, Brandon Routh, and Jason Schwartzman all rock as ex boyfriends. The film is hilarious and spunky- sure there are some weak plot points and the end fight (in the style of anime) is both over the top and lasts a little too long. All this is forgivable for Scott Pilgrim- a cutting edge film ahead of its time.

5) THE FIGHTER [A-]

David O. Russell’s The Fighter has Oscar movie written all over it. The story of an underdog boxer making an against-all-odds comeback is a proven formula for the heart string- its inspiration for the soul. In all honesty, The Fighter lives up to its nature. Mark Wahlberg plays Micky Ward, a boxer who lives in the shadow of his once-great, now cracked-out brother Dicky (Christian Bale). The brothers have seven wacky, puffy haired sisters, a very involved mother and a sweet father. Roger Ebert criticized Wahlberg’s character, saying how he was a passive reactionary. This didn’t bother me. The story is about living in the shadow. Micky is the “hero”- he’s calculated, he’s sweet, he tries to do the right thing. And it’s not Wahlberg’s job to carry the movie. Christian Bale gives a award worthy performance and the interplay between the sisters and the parents is hilarious. The movie is very Irish, New York- the accents, the family, the wit is all comical and backed with heart; the film is welcome feel good. For me, Amy Adams as Micky’s bartender girlfriend Charlene steals the show, SHE IS A REVELATION. She’s feisty, outspoken, high energy, willful, sweet, loving, sexy, has attitude, and she doesn’t take shit from anyone. Charlene and Dicky are perfect for each other. Supporting actress Oscar here we come.

6) TRON: LEGACY [B+]

Directed by computer effects guru Joseph Kosinski, TRON: Legacy is my lone ranger. The sequel to the 1982 original, the film far exceeded my expectations. It’s lush, beautiful; a visual playground- the created computer world is a delight to enter. It’s the blockbuster event-film of December- it’s more enjoyable and packs more originality and heart then last year’s Avatar. The formula is simple- it’s the hero’s journey. Sam Flynn (a superb Garrett Hedlund) journeys into the unknown, teams up with Quorra (cyber dream-woman Olivia Wilde), reunites with his father (returning vet Jeff Bridges), and goes head to head in multiple challenges before escaping the clutches of Clu (1980s Bridges). Dang this film was a rockin good time. Critics considered, TRON: Legacy is a technical pioneer. 1980’s Jeff Bridges was created using a combination of CGI, motion-capture technology, and a body double. With this design, Clu works well in the computer world. The film is blast and the music is a sweet, funky mix of electronic and orchestra- thank you Daft Punk for a mood-setting score. Legacy also reminded me of my favorite fantasy film Back to the Future. Sam, an everyday, cool hero, travels to essentially a version of the future. He meets an alternate version of his father who is similar to him in age. He is faced with what he might become. To be sure, the film has a few missteps along the way. The ending with Clu was overdramatic, there was a lack of closure, and the eight hour portal was too arbitrary. But those disc fights and light cycle races, come on- Legacy is a joy to behold.

7) HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS - PART 1 [A-]

Was it just me, or did the cultural reaction to Deathly Hallows have a shift? The initial reaction was superb- people liked it, praised it, said it was the best Harry Potter to date, and I agreed. I marveled at the David Yates film- the pacing, the maturity, the images, the nostalgia- this was all wonderful. Then the opinions of many fans changed but mine did not. I didn’t read the book and my knowledge of the past films is limited. Like Roger Ebert, I am concerned with the actual movie watching experience and that is why I praise Deathly Hallows. I got sucked right in, I loved the characters, Hermione is grand, and the universe had a nice, dark, and adult feel to it. Little touches like ‘The Tale of the Three Brothers’ rocked. My praise of the film may be on the surface but alas I commend the film as the best Harry Potter installment- until part 2 comes out this summer of course.

8) THE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT [B+]

I loved this film and truly feel that it is a work of quality. Directed by Lisa Cholodenk, this semi-autobiographical story is about two lesbian moms (Annette Bening and Julianne Moore) who each had one child with the same sperm donor (Mark Ruffalo). When the kids are older they seek out Ruffalo and begin a friendly relationship- Julianne Moore, as well, finds his charm alluring. I had a few problems with the film. (1) The end resolution where the daughter is dropped off at college draws out the film too long. The film should have ended with the moms beginning to drive and holding hands- showing their reconciliation. (2) Ruffalo’s character is dropped too quickly and villainized too much. The family thinks his charm is fake- but as the audience we know better. (3) It would have been nice if some lip service explained Moore’s past experience with being bi-sexual or once straight. Other than that the film was wonderful. All the performances were extraordinary- especially Ruffalo (his best work) and Bening.

9) THE GHOST WRITER [B+]

[For the FatScribe review go here.] The Ghost Writer had a limited release back in February, but those who loved it, remember it. The film is a political thriller from Roman Polanski and (despite what you think about him) Polanski has chops. In the film, a ghost writer (Ewan McGregor) agrees to finish the memoirs of former British Prime Minister Adam Lang (Peirce Brosnan). It would take three pages to describe the plot, in short, a lot of shit hits the fan and it all makes for a fantastic mystery. Adapted from Robert Harris’s novel, The Ghost Writer is a captivating, suspenseful, crime thriller. And well done Tom Wilkinson.

10) INCEPTION [A-]

Inception is another superb notch in Christopher Nolan’s cinematic belt. The story is original; Nolan was pitching it to Warner Brothers back in 2001. During this time, the director sharpened his chops to become one of the greatest filmmakers in the last 20 years. Most of us know what the film is about: Entering a dream, sharing a dream, accessing the unconscious mind, and being able to extract information from said mind. It was the special effects summer event film of 2010. The effects were wonderful, the story was trippy, the writing is clever, and the cast jumps out of GQ and The Dark Knight: Leo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page- bravo. Well done Chris Nolan, thank you for the mind trip.

Honorable Mentions

11) BLACK SWAN [B+]

I have an adverse relationship with director Darren Aronofsky. He is a quality filmmaker, a true auteur, but I have a hard time consuming his films. Take Black Swan, the psychological thriller starring Natalie Portman in an Oscar worthy performance. Watching the film I was uncomfortable, stressed out, filled with anxiety, on edge, and somewhat disturbed. It was not an easy film to watch. I can grade it on quality but the subject matter is so rough that it dampers the greatness. For me, the film worked best in the third act when Portman really started losing her mind. Shutter Island, however, taught us that it’s easy to misstep with a psychological thriller. The line between reality and delusion can become too convoluted; its fine to break the rules for the sake of breaking the rules, just realize that it might constrain your film in the process.

12) I’M STILL HERE [B+]

What the hell is I’m Still Here? We know now that it’s a “mockumentary.” Casey Affleck’s film about Joaquin Pheonix quitting acting, growing a beard, and starting a rap career wasn’t “real”- but this unique and superb film was so much more than a mock-doc, it was brave. Joaquin Pheonix takes performance art to a new level; he lived the character for two years. The film is Joaquin’s commentary on life as an actor- the anger at typecasting, the good-guy image, and the public eye. He takes our love for reality, flips it around, and takes it up a notch to see the actor’s emotional, mental, and physical breakdown. It might be a hoax, but it’s touching. Joaquin finds redemption by returning to his roots, it was a memorable experience.

Caleb S Garcia

December 26, 2010

Caleb's Guide to 2010 Films

2010-12-24T17:06:00.000-08:00

These are the 45 films of 2010 that I have seen listed in the order that I saw them. The breakdown is as follows:

A) 1
A-) 7
B+) 12
B) 5
B-) 10
C+) 5
C) 3

I keep a list and grade each film after the initial viewing. I read reviews, talk to various people, and then go back through the grades at the end of the year. In the end, I aim to be 100% true to my own feelings- I grade according to honesty and peace of mind.

01) Wolfman (Johnson, 2010) [C+]
02) Morning Glory (Michell, 2010) [B-]
03) Ghost Writer (Polanski, 2010) [B+]
04) Alice in Wonderland (Burton, 2010) [C+]
05) Greenberg (Baumbach, 2010) [B]
06) The Runaways (Sigismondi, 2010) [B+]
07) Toy Story 3 (Unkrich, 2010) [A]
08) Knight and Day (Mangold, 2010) [B-]
09) Grown Ups (Dugan, 2010) [C+]
10) Eclipse (Slade, 2010) [B-]
11) Inception (Nolan, 2010) [A-]
12) Salt (Noyce, 2010) [B+]
13) Dinner for Schmucks (Roach, 2010) [B+]
14) The Expendables (Stallone, 2010) [B]
15) Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (Wright, 2010) [A-]
16) Despicable Me (Coffin, 2010) [B]
17) Machete (Rodriguez, 2010) [B-]
18) I’m Still Here (Affleck, 2010) [B+]
19) The American (Corbijin, 2010) [B-]
20) Iron Man 2 (Favreau, 2010) [B+]
21) Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps (Stone, 2010) [C+]
22) The Social Network (Fincher, 2010) [A-]
23) Robin Hood: The Director’s Cut (Scott, 2010) [B-]
24) RED (Schwentke, 2010) [B-]
25) Shutter Island (Scorsese, 2010) [B]
26) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows- Part 1 (Yates, 2010) [A-]
27) Jonah Hex (Heyward, 2010) [C]
28) Tangled (Howard/Greno, 2010) [B-]
29) Love and Other Drugs (Zwick, 2010) [B-]
30) Burlesque (Antin, 2010) [C+]
31) 127 Hours (Boyle, 2010) [A-]
32) The Next Three Days (Haggis, 2010) [B+]
33) Waking Sleeping Beauty (Hahn, 2010) [B+]
34) The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (Apted, 2010) [B-]
35) The Losers (White, 2010) [B-]
36) The Kids Are All Right (Cholodenko, 2010) [B+]
37) The Tourist (Donnersmarck, 2010) [C]
38) Black Swan (Aronofsky, 2010) [B+]
39) The King’s Speech (Hooper, 2010) [B+]
40) TRON: Legacy (Kosinski, 2010) [B+]
41) The Fighter (Russell, 2010) [B+]
42) How Do You Know (Brooks, 2010) [C]
43) Solitary Man (Koppelman/Levien, 2010) [B+]
44) Kick-Ass (Vaughan, 2010) [B]
45) True Grit (Coen Bros., 2010) [B+]

Caleb S Garcia
December 24, 2010

The Clover Building

2010-12-24T15:01:00.000-08:00

A slide-show video that shows the evolution of each room for the website design company Clover can he seen here.

There's a certain bravado to construction. I worked on a team of all males, a common occurrence in this field. Each of the workers wanted to prove that they were up for the job's physical demands. The long days, and the ability to complete a task on your own, was a constant test. Being a team player is a must- especially for a temporary worker who wanted to quickly feel the pulse of the place and contribute equally. I worked with six guys, all great people in their 20s and 30s. Three of them were knife enthusiasts- they bought, collected, and showed off their trusty blades at work.

My relationship with construction, and philosophy behind what work should be, is convoluted. Construction feels like work. I enjoyed the process and the skills acquired- it was a wonderful learning experience. The men and women who built America did a fine job, it's simply not the fine job for me. At the end of those long, 12-hour days, I would drive home and feel an immense satisfaction. I felt sore and accomplished, I had survived. I felt a connection to the builders of the past- a generation of men sitting on their porch, feeling satisfied. If building or designing (be it hands-on work or supervision) is your passion (and I can see how it could be) then more power to you. I say go and prosper. But I am not a warrior- as much as I appreciate the warrior trade. Warriors like bravado because to them its not bravado- they're in on the joke- its a brotherhood of builders.

I don't know these men and I don't know their story. I don't know what puts a smile on their face, and what keeps them awake at night. But I do know that its terrible being stuck in a rut- feeling forced into something- a lack of options. I think some people work construction because its the easy way out- its what they've always done and they feel no great need to rock the boat. I know that some people work as a means to distract themselves from living their life and following their passions. When the ancient Greeks died, they asked one question at the funeral, "did he have passion?" I hope that in my pursuit for financial independence, and the realism that pursuit necessitates, I don't lose my ambition or suffer my passion in the process. I am "restorative"- I see the value in all and this seven week construction project in Newbury Park, CA - a half hour drive from where I live - was a grand experience.

Caleb S Garcia
December 24, 2010

V. Diaries 2.11 "By the Light of the Moon"

2010-12-12T15:59:00.000-08:00

Also posted on VampireSite.net.

By the light of the moon, Tyler transforms into a werewolf. By the light of the sun, vampires die. But the moon’s light is merely a reflection of the sun’s light, and so the curse that makes lycans into lunar slaves is a byproduct of the undead being harmed by a light source meant for the living. Unless you use a witch’s dark magic to undo the darkness that shadows the vampires, so that creatures of the night can see the light. Rose peered out the UV blocked windows so she could watch the world of the living. She saw the light but had not been a part of it for nearly half a millennium. Stefan looks at Katherine and sees death, the appeal of Elena, despite being an irrational bitch on a regular basis, is the light she harbors within.

So we begin episode 11 of season 2. It was truly heart wrenching to see Tyler leave a message for Mason in a desperate attempt to seek comfort. I for one was against the whole killing of Mason, what a waste of a character. A woman named Jules, a fellow werewolf, hears the message and goes to Mystic Falls to see Tyler. Her lack of knowing Mason’s whereabouts renders Mason a missing person, officially. Jules reports back to a mysterious person (Elijah?) that Tyler is also a werewolf. Damon and Alaric see her at the bar and figure out that she is a werewolf when they spike her drink with wolfsbane and she identifies the smell. The addition of Jules is a welcome plot addition; Mason is the kind of person who would have connected with another werewolf, especially a hot female one.

Ok, so this transformation process is waaaaay drawn out, overplayed, and melodramatic. I could understand the first transformation being hell (the equivalent to a person dying before becoming a vampire), but here the show is stretching out a simple plot device. Also, the pay off isn’t even that great because he becomes an actual wolf (with a human brain I assume), then a half-man/half-wolf style werewolf, which would be a million times better, more expensive but hey you save costs on an animal trainer. Tyler eventually becomes a wolf and Caroline tries to help but ends up running away in the woods until he turns back into a human.

To Catch a Thief: Bonnie and Jeremy test Elena and she fails, for punishment they trap her in the house with a spell. Bonnie asks Luca if he can de-spell the moonstone. They perform a spell but Luca tricks Bonnie into thinking the spell was undone and the moonstone destroyed. In reality, (ready for the big revelation) Luca and Martin kept the moonstone and gave it to Elijah who has a plan (that he revealed to Elena) to use Elena as bait and then kill Klaus. But wait! There’s more! A deal with the devil is made and that’s just Elijah’s deal with Elena to free Stefan from the tomb (with Martin’s help) while keeping Katherine in there. Elijah is getting mighty interesting in this story. He may kill a lot of people for no good reason, but he’s an original and he’s kind of awesome.

Side note: Elijah says “thanks for inviting me into your home Jenna” which I believe, but since Elijah is an original, I’m guessing he could have found a way around it.

Damon wasn’t given much to do in this episode, oh well. He does manage to piss off Jules who in return turns into a wolf and bites Rose. At first the bite wound heals, but then, in the midst of alpha-male-friends-with-benefits passion, Rose is revealed to be infected at the bite mark. Will Rose die? Most likely, but at least her death makes sense and her character arc was carried out in a logical way, not like Mason, whose story was cut too short by floppy writers.

You win some, you lose some. You lose Rose and you gain two fully functioning werewolves, plus Elijah and the warlocks are getting more screen time. We also got Tyler-bondage and sexy time in the cave of wonders, but the latter was all in Stefan’s mind. After Nina’s Victoria Secret Ad, the former lovers talk and Kat tells Stefan to look at Isobel’s journals to find Klaus- sounds like a plan that should by all means fail but will probably succeed.

Hmmm…I wonder if there’s a way to change the curse so that killing Kat (a vampire doppel) will undo the curse. We have to wait seven weeks to find out, the first half of season two is officially over. Thank you episode 11, you were most delightful, and I will be off review duty for the time being. War out!

Caleb S Garcia
December 12, 2010

V. Diaries 2.10 "The Sacrifice"

2010-12-08T11:29:00.000-08:00

Also posted at VampireSite.net

Ever hear off the phrase messiah complex? It’s a loosely defined slang term that means, as wiki puts it, “A state of mind in which an individual holds a belief that they are, or is destined to become, a savior.” I myself have added to this wiki page, citing an example from Smallville (1.13) in which Lex tells Clark, “you can’t save the world. All you’ll end up with is a Messiah complex and a lot of enemies.”

If you look up the word “savior” on wiki, you’ll see the related word “Salvatore” which is, “A male given name, in honor of Christ as the Savior, equivalent to Spanish Salvador.” The story of Christ is a story of sacrifice, the Messiah as the ultimate redeemer. As vampires, the Salvatore brothers experience a death and resurrection of sorts, a troupe of a Christ-figure. They both agree that they will protect Elena at any cost and given the doppel history, Stefan believes he is destined to save/protect her. With this considered, Stefan’s messiah complex is downplayed, which is appropriate. He is focused more on the moment and is too romantic for a consuming ego.

The title comes from Elena appointing herself as “the sacrifice.” She takes the history and the mythos and concludes that it is her fate to save the ones she loves and no one can convince her otherwise. It is also a sacrifice that breaks the curse. Elena may have a messiah complex. Continuing the Christian symbolism, before Christ, the curse of sin was paid with animal blood, and generally, works. But Christ was the sacrifice that broke the curse, allowing direct salvation through faith. Thus in Diaries, if the curse is broken then vampires can walk in the sun, and werewolves do not turn against their will. When Christ breaks the curse, man can now see the sun, the light, the truth, through the Holy Spirit.

Onto the story: Although Elena is the sacrifice, multiple characters act sacrificially to protect other characters; the expression, “don’t be a hero” falls on deaf ears. Bonnie, after being linked with Luca’s energy, would sacrifice her well-being to try two spells. The mellow spell where ash temporarily weakens Katherine and the dangerous spell that opens and closes the force filled.

All good sacrifices are done out of love, and it is Jeremy’s love that compels him to take the kryptonite-ash and retrieve the moonstone. Jeremy fails and acts as a feeding vessel for Kat until Stefan sacrifices himself as a prisoner in Jeremy’s place. A troupe of sacrifice: taking on the punishment that is deserved by another.

Elena makes huge assumptions. She says that Rose owes her because “one word from me and Stefan and Damon would have killed you.” You’re forgetting that Rose is older than Katherine, a vampire that the Salvatores cannot take on alone. Rose repeatedly demonstrates her strength over Damon, and Stefan is weaker.

Stefan makes the point to Elena: “If we can de-spell the moonstone we can save your life.” “I know,” Elena responds, “everyone keeps saying that.” Here Elena is offered a way to break the curse without her dying as a sacrifice yet she does not want to do it, she is determined to be a martyr which seems uncharacteristic of Elena.

Elena and Rose go to see Slater who is dead. They are interrupted by Elijah who used one of Dr. Martin’s spells to find her. Elijah shows up, kills two guys and then leaves. Damon comes to the rescue but doesn’t do anything. Elijah was just testing out the spell and saw that Elena will be kept safe via the Salvatores.

Side note: Bonnie is officially beautiful and has an affinity for low cut tops and Crest white-strips.

Side note 2: Why do I have a feeling that the Petrova doppelganger is going to be backed up all the way to Eve, and that Klaus, the oldest vampire, was her first love from the beginning of man? He has been searching for her for 10,000 years; I wouldn’t put it past this show.

Story 2: Tyler is anticipating his first turn into a werewolf thanks to a video and journal that Mason left behind. It doesn’t sound fun. Caroline helps and acts all serious. We’ll see if this booming romance between blondie and teen wolf phases better than Bon Bon and Elena’s brother, who was rejected and denied. Also, Matt is a useless character who needs to leave.

Caleb S Garcia

December 8, 2010

The Hot List 2010

2010-11-16T21:26:00.000-08:00

It's time to warm up from that November chill with "The Hot List 2010." These women in the entertainment industry really know how to sizzle. The Top 10 are...

10) ROSE MCGOWAN

Maybe it's because I watched Scream and Grindhouse recently, but I never fully appreciated the stunning beauty of Rose McGowan. Although she hasn't been relevant for a few years, the former star of TV's "Charmed" is a Wall of Fame Hottie that deserves recognition in the number 10 spot.

9) LEIGHTON MEESTER

The "Gossip Girl" star is an elegant beauty- earthy, fun, vibrant. I don't watch the show but it was a feat to go to any newsstand earlier this year without seeing Leighton on some very lovely looking covers.

8) JESSICA ALBA

Alba was a hall of famer in her prime and this year she made a classy comeback and reminded us all why we love the girl-next-door. She dropped the rom-coms for her Rodriquez roots.

7) SOFIA VERGARA

At 38, the very attractive, Columbian bombshell can be seen on "Modern Family" in all her Latin lover glory. Her confidence, spunk, and thick accent make her all the more lovable. I swear this isn't a list of just TV stars, I'm simply trying to pick women that are relevant to my entertainment, except "GG."

6) ANGELINA JOLIE

Jolie ranks up there with Marilyn Monroe as being a sex symbol that defined a century. And Angelia will continue to make the list for as long as possible, weather she's killing Russian spies or talking in a Clint Eastwood drama. She's freakin Jolie, everything that Jennifer Aniston does will look innocent compared to her. Jolie's in a league of her own, she's a goddess.

5) KIM KARDASHIAN

A very full woman who stars in a really entertaining reality show. Kim is the alpha, the epitome, a force to be reckoned with. Plus did you see that "W" spread? Nuff said.

4) CHRISTINA HENDRICKS

I've only seen "Mad Men" a few times, but it was enough for me to go mad over this woman. Plus I like "Esquire," plus its Christina Hendricks, you either find her sexy or you don't.

3) MEGAN FOX

This is not a popularity contest people, its a "who's hot" contest and I give credit where credit is due. She's the ultimate fox. She's the fantasy.

2) SCARLETT JOHANSSON

It was neck and neck, but the winner two years in a row takes the number two spot this time. Scar Jo is still a top contestant, a hot symbol for mankind to behold. It's no wonder that this leather-wearing superhottie is married to Ryan Reynolds who "People" magazine just named the "Sexiest Man Alive."

and the number one hottest chick is....

1) KATY PERRY

The only non-actress, unless you count those jaw-dropping music videos, Katy Perry kicked exceptional ass this year to earn that rare number one spot as sexiest entertainer. A true bombshell, a true personality, a true teenage dream, and Cali girl. Just look that black and white!

Caleb S Garcia

November 16, 2010

V. Diaries 2.9 "Katerina"

2010-11-14T21:00:00.000-08:00

Also posted on VampireSite.net.

Tangent: Before Kevin Williamson created Dawson’s Creek and The Vampire Diaries (Damon’s Creek?), he wrote the screenplay for the 1994 hit Scream (and the sequals). Williamson is clearly a fan of the horror and soap opera genres. His wit sometimes shines through on Diaries.

Katerina Graham, Katerina Petrova, two for the price of one.

Lots of stories going on in this ep, lets break it down.

Numba one: Katherine Pierce, aka Katerina Petrova, was born in Southern Europe in the year 1473. We begin in Bulgaria, 1490- where a human Katerina, age 17, gives birth to a daughter- thus beginning the lineage that leads to Elena. Nina Dobrev was actually born in Bulgaria, in the capital city Sofia - how accurate.

According to my calculations, Katherine is 537 years old. Katerina met Klaus the vampire in England in 1492. Klaus is the oldest of the originals, the first generation of vampires. He has a foot solider named Elijah who, in present day, is powerful and dangerous and is able to compel vampires. Klaus wanted Katerina so he could break the curse by sacrificing the Patrova doppelganger. So Katherine is the doppelganger of an even older woman who looks just like her. Katherine explains that “the curse was bound by the sacrifice of Petrova blood…witches are crafty with their spells…[and] the doppelganger was created as away to undo the spell.” Created by whom, a witch? So both Katherine and Elena are created doppelgangers of some unknown Patrova woman? Are there going to be three Nina Dobrevs on this show?

So Katerina ran from Klaus and met Rose who refused to help her [bitch!]. Katerina stabs herself because she would rather die than go back to Klaus. Rose is so afraid of Klaus that she makes Katerina drink her blood with the intention to heal her not turn her. But Trevor is fond of Kat and doesn’t want sister to give Kat to Klaus. Katerina then kills herself so she would turn because Klaus needed a human doppelganger. Kat then returns to Bulgaria to discover that Klaus has just killed her family, that bastard! Katerina, Rose, and Trevor (who met the true death) have been running from Klaus since. Katherine looks really pale in present day and she has a great smokers’ voice.

Big revelation people: Katherine returned to Mystic Falls to hand Elena, and moonstone, over to Klaus so he could break the curse…he’s obsessed with this mysterious curse. This must be a really damn good curse for Katherine to go through the trouble assembling the doppel, the stone, a werewolf, a witch, and a vampire.

On a side note: why didn’t Stefan just take the moonstone from Katherine when it knocked her out at the Masquerade Ball? Hmmm.

Sorry for all the plot summary but this ep was packed with back story and I was trying to wrap my mind around it. The rest of this will go faster.

Story 2: Rose is a babe. Can we all give kudos to Rose? Please Kevin let her stay around for a while. She and Damon will make good lovers; they even bicker like an illogical couple.

Damon: I’ll drive.
Rose: No, you forget that not all of us can do sun.
Damon: Ok then you drive.

So she gets exposed to the sun in the passenger’s seat but not in the driver’s seat?? Aren’t all the windows tinted? Damon and Rose road trip to see a vamp named Slater who used his eternity to acquire 18 degrees, three Masters, and four PhDs- those student loans must be hell. He probably did a lot of night/internet school too, because no one seemed to notice him there? He’s also good with Craigslist, too bad he dies by the episode’s end.

Elijah throwing the coins and shattering the window is one of the coolest moments in the history of the show; it’s definitely in the top five.

Damon and Rose celebrate their survival by getting in on by the fire.

What else? Caroline makes too many promises because she’s too nice, but we love Candice anyway. Ian Somerhalder likes to make his eyes big. Elena blames herself. Nina gets an Emmy nom.

Story number three: Jeremy likes Bonnie and plays it cool but will Bon Bon go for a younger guy when new man Luca the warlock enters the drama? So why are all the witches on this show black? Bonnie, Grams, Lucy, Luca, Dr. Martin- no Sabrina in this voodoo stereotype- what about a Salam…that could be fun.

Also, Dr. Martin is working with Klaus! Two teams seem to be forming. It is so on.

Caleb S Garcia
November 13, 2010

Clive Owen Cool - Part 1

2010-11-10T21:55:00.000-08:00

10) He likes his trench coat, like he likes his coffee…and his president….black.
09) His British accent makes other British accents sound like a dirty-south speech impediment.
08) He is a founding father of gun-fu.
07) Hey Neo, does Clive Owen know that you raid his wardrobe?
06) When asked what his country can do for him, he said “not enough, I’m going to America.”
05) He pulled the Excalibur out of the stone with one hand while macking Guinevere with other .
04) Bruce Willis, Clive Owen, Johnny Depp are the new Allies; Axis of Evil beware.
03) The Queen won’t knight him because she doesn’t want to make the other sirs look bad.
02) He doesn’t have a middle name; he only has what is necessary.
01) There's no 008, there’s just Clive Owen.

There’s cool and then there’s Clive Owen cool.

Caleb S Garcia
November 10, 2010

V. Diaries 2.8 "Rose"

2010-11-07T21:55:00.000-08:00

Also posted on VampireSite.

I’d like to begin with a tangent. Elena has daddy issues to the third power. First, her birth parents give her up for adoption, then her adopted parents die in a car crash, then her birth father, John Gilbert- who she views as an uncle, returns, acts strange, and "dies." Elena is being raised by a juvenile aunt and lacks a male figure in her life. She dated Matt; she was probably a chronic dater, who always wanted some man to fulfill her needs- that’s why she was so keen on inviting Matt back into her life. Stefan fulfills Elena’s absent father issues. Old soul that he is, Stefan is Daddy 2.0, a protective caregiver in the body of a young man- a fantasy fulfilled. Elena gets swept away in the old legend, a historic society of past lore, and she loves him for sweeping her up- tangent over.

“A Rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” No, that’s not Ashley Greene’s Alice from Twilight, that’s a new European vampire named Rose- same short wavy hair though.

“Rose” picks up where “Masquerade” left off. Elena is unconscious in a trunk and handed over to a Euro vamp. Caroline and Damon have a morning chat so the audience can be reminded that Tyler is a werewolf and stuff. Teen wolf is now exhibiting random acts of strength: lock breaking, slam dunking, where’s Michael J. Fox when you need him? Tyler is onto Caroline, and as good as blondie is at playing dumb, she’s not good enough. It’s best that these things are out in the open among cast regulars. Tyler pulls a B and E and round one goes to the goldilock curls.

So the hunt for Elena begins. Its Ouija board meets GPS, when Bon Bon uses a spell and Jeremy’s blood to track Elena’s whereabouts. The Salvatore brothers set out because, you know, “its Elena”- which is somehow justification for them but not for Jeremy. So the two hit the road in a very brotherly, classic car, Supernatural kind of way. Hey, at least Jeremy and Bonnie get to bond! After Jeremy uses his LG cell to send info to Stefan, Bon gets a bloody nose while teleporting paper. But when she wakes the two have a genuine moment, it’s true, just listen to the soft music.

The Euro vamp is Trevor and his sister vamp is Rose. She reveals the moonstone binds the curse and sacrificing the doppel (aka Elena) breaks the curse. But what curse? I’m curse confused. The two are connected to the “originals” and someone named Elijah- the show’s version of Twilight’s Volturi. Rose negotiates with Elijah: she’ll give him the doppel of Katerina Patrova in excahnge for her and Trevor’s freedom, a pardon. Then Elijah kills Trevor for kicks (decapitation is another way to kill a vampire) and Rose is free but pissed. Elijah glamours Elena, she reveals some locations, and then the Salvatores crash the party. Elijah is stopped but he’ll be back…muhahahaha. "Rose" was written by Brian Young, under the direction of Liz Friedlander, not bad people, not bad.

The Damon/Elena ending: Damon needed to get a confession off his chest and admit his love. Although the scene seems like a rehash, Damon has a way of tugging at the heart strings- the conviction of a champ. We feel for Damon, we know that no dark side comes without pain. Cheer up Damon, there’s a war to be fought, and a team to assemble. Elena can always be that girl worth fighting for.

Caleb S Garcia

November 7, 2010

Just Luxe

2010-11-07T09:33:00.000-08:00

My first professionally published piece is available at JustLuxe.com! It's about a two day/two night trip I took with eight writers visiting multiple Orange County hotels. I'd like to thank Johhny G for the opportunity.

Caleb S Garcia

November 7, 2010

V. Diaries 2.7 "Masquerade"

2010-10-31T13:19:00.000-07:00

Also posted on VampireSite.

Happy Halloween. As Ben Stein lamented in The Mask, “We all wear masks…metaphorically speaking.” Just in time for All-Hallows-Eve, the day of the (un)dead, mask wearing is an old tradition, as is the masquerade ball. Beyond being this episode’s gathering hub for characters, bal masqué, as it’s known in French, originated in the 15th century and popularized a century later in the Italian Renaissance.

Did Elena pull the move where she gets a new/old boy toy (Matt) because Stefan is gone? Did she really bother calling Matt to help bring Jenna home from the hospital when Jeremy was helping and when she could have called Alaric who Jenna is basically dating? Sigh. I’m going to use a lot of dialogue in this review to emphasize a change: Jeremy’s superiority over Elena as a Gilbert. Sample one, about Katherine:

Elena: We’re not going to do anything Jeremy.
Jeremy: She tried to kill Jenna. We can’t let her get away with that.
Elena: Yes we can. If it keeps us safe, then yes we can...she wins, the end.

Nothing like giving up. Fortunately, Jeremy, Stefan, Damon, Bonnie, Caroline, and Alaric all disagree with Elena and devise a plan to stop her. And it works, more or less.

This episode was written by show creators Kevin Williamson and Julie Plec, under the direction of Charles Beeson, and it’s evident. With tight dialogue and a firm grasp of story evolution, the characters develop nicely. Thanks for all the dramatic close ups Beeson.

“I’m impersonating my dull as dishwater doppelganger Elena,” smirks Katherine, as she straightens her hair for the “feed the something charity” for “helping the homeless.” The Lockwoods may throw rich parties every week, but it’s “for a good cause.” The late Richard Lockwood was a busy socialite, the Jay Gatsby of Mystic Falls – perhaps Tyler will share a destined pain. (Mind you that I am always happy the more the show gets removed from the high school element).

Elena chills at home before she lies to Jenna and Alaric and heads to the masked carnival. The logic for going is of usual Elena sharpness. “[Stefan] would never go to the party for himself; he did that stuff for me,” sighs Elena. Wrong. The Salvatore brothers went to the Founder’s Ball, at the Lockwood mansion, at the beginning. Elena, it’s one thing to give up, it’s another thing to try and stop others who haven’t:

Elena: And how am I supposed to feel if one of you gets hurt because of me?
Jeremy: It’s not just you anymore Elena, she’s messed with all of us.

Little bro puts sis in her place again, ouch. I’m happy that Jeremy “loosened that emo thing” as Jenna calls it. Jeremy is now the mortal that embodies the audience, the lens of viewership. Jeremy and Bonnie? A little romantic brew, getting your witch on. I like it. Good twist. Bitchy-witchy is actually cute when she’s not burn-at-the-stake worthy. Or as Jeremy was thinking, “Every little thing she does is magic / Everything she does just turns me on.”

But let’s reflect an odd moment:
Jeremy: Is that the spell book I read about in my family’s old journal?
Bonnie: It’s my ancestor Emily’s.

How the hell is Bonnie supposed to know that Jeremy? Come on! That’s worse than your line about the sex spell. Way to be subtle.

I digress. Now, I don’t know how the whole body-linking works, but those stabs should have done some serious damage to Elena, unless the damage is exact, in which case Katherine’s supernatural body would endure, and thus so would Elena’s. Poor Elena, that did look painful.

Bonnie teaming up with Lucy, the second cousin twice removed or something witch, was another good twist. I’m still not sure what exactly happened. Does the moonstone naturally weaken vampires or did Lucy curse the MacGuffin to harm Katherine? Either way, Damon is now on dungeon duty. Katherine is locked in a tomb, an eternity of sulking and punishment. Until she escapes.

Another great twist thanks to the creator of Dawson’s Creek! Tyler kills random girl Sarah, she was a plan B for Katherine; if Matt fails, its Sarah’s turn. My gift, my curse. Who am I’m I? I’m the new wolf man. Tyler the terrible, Katherine’s plan B.

As annoying as Elena can be, I have to give kudos to Nina Dobrev, she’s all vinegar and sass with atomic bomb timing as Kat. And she speaks for the audience, “Does Elena enjoy having both of you worship at her alter ?” The rhetorical question we all wanted to ask the Salvatore brothers with the implied answer: yes. Elena loves it.

On a side note: Caroline makes a fine woman in red, and has a mean right hook.

Parting words. “The middle of it is exactly where you need to be,” advises Lucy to Bonnie. The only way out is through, not around…through. And we all wear masks, metaphorically speaking.

Caleb S Garcia

October 31, 2010

V. Diaries 2.6 "Plan B"

2010-10-23T17:56:00.000-07:00

Also posted on VampireSite.

Vampires are sex. It’s how they feel alive. No longer hungering for food or status, the undead lust for blood and flesh. In Stefan’s case, the hunger is in the form of obsession, it’s his fantasy love for Elena that keeps him going- while for Katherine….it’s pleasure. Thus opens the sixth episode of season two titled “Plan B.” The title refers to a line that Katherine says at the episode’s end. With Mason dead, Katherine must find new werewolf to use: her plan B.

This show seems to be an episode behind with their episode naming. In the last episode “Kill or Be Killed” no one was actually faced with said dilemma (except the red-shirt sheriffs), but in this episode Damon says “kill or be killed” to justify killing Mason. Does “Kill of Be Killed” foreshadow “Plan B” which foreshadows the next episode? Is this going to be a regular thing?

I digress. This week’s convenient character gathering is at the “Lockwood Charity Thing,” because that’s what rich people do, host shit every week. Jeremy and Damon ask Tyler about the moonstone, but Ty gave it to the young uncle who’s more like an older brother. To locate the stone, Bonnie causes Mason to have a brain aneurism, an aneurism not caused by the resident witch’s snobby self importance, but motivated by Damon’s desire to create another prisoner-torture scene.

I’m going to be honest: Mason’s death was a cheap let down. The character deserved a more tasteful departure then this one-note sloppy writing. Alas, Mason is dead. Damon insists that he wanted to die anyway, but I don’t buy it. Damon threw his heart across the room Temple of Doom style. And when Katherine finds out she is more pissed than usual. So pissed that she glamours Aunt Jenna into stabbing herself, poor auntie.

What was clever is Bonnie’s vision that the moonstone is in the well. Stefan gets “vervained” when he plummets into a well filled with vamp-kryptonite. The scene makes for a cool Lost moment. Fortunately, our fab trio of ladies, Elena, blondie, and “judgy,” save Stefan before it’s too late. And how is everyone communicating? This week in overt product placement: no not the Ford Fiesta, but a Samsung cell phone for AT&T where you, susceptible audience member, can text like Elena, or look up stuff on Wikipedia like Jeremy. Come on, all the Gilberts are doing it!

Back to the story: I still don’t know what’s going on between Caroline and her mother. Those two have some deep issues. I think the mother is lying. She doesn’t want to make nice with her daughter. Sherriff Forbes hates vampires and still does. Blondie is gonna have to improvise.

Then, at the show’s end, comes the breakup. But are Stefan and Elena still pretending? Elena is the one to say it: Katherine has finally won, Elena and Stefan are through. Sorry Stefan, you’ll have to find something else to obsess over. Or as Damon says to Jeremy, “Your search for life purpose is as obvious as it is tragic.”

Speaking of, Jeremy gets the reward for best line of the episode and most balls out of any character. He, of all people, puts control-freak Elena in her place. When she bitches that Damon is off limits, little bro harks, “Well I don’t really care what you want Elena. It’s because of you that I’m in this mess in the first place so, I’m sorry. You don’t really get to tell me what I’m going to do.” Looks like Elena and Stefan need a plan B.

And I need a new man crush. RIP Mason Lockwood.

Caleb S Garcia

October 22, 2010

Update Oct. 2010

2010-10-23T17:47:00.000-07:00

“Be clear about your goal but be flexible about the process of achieving it.” - Brian Tracy

It’s been just over four months since I left school to embrace an unknown future. During this time I did a lot of soul searching. It’s an ongoing time of self-discovery, the quest to “know thyself.” It was a chapter of transition with a lot of lows and highs. After the June celebrations, I worked various construction jobs with Rob and his friend Steve Corbitt. In July, I took a road trip up to Idaho where I visited Ralph and went on a five day backpacking trip. I was blessed by the hospitality of the many people I visited on my drive up and down the coast. The trip awakened my passion for travel. I am destined for future adventures.

The construction died down and I brainstormed long-term and short-term endeavors. I considered joining the Peace Corps. I applied, got the letters of recommendation, went to the interview and concluded that it was not for me. One reason was timing. Also, strong second language skills are a must and, if you know me, foreign language is not my strong suit. Thank you Ralph, Eric, Tyler, and Rob for the letters.

So I frantically searched. I looked into doing more Extra/Background work (I was already in the system for Rich King Casting from my two episodes on “Numb3rs”), but decided to put that ambition on hold. I applied for an office jobs and a tutoring gig to no avail. Such is the nature of the beast. To fill the time, I began tackling my neglected stack of books and greatly enjoyed each one of them: KWML, The Alchemist, Strengths Finder, Goals, and Wild at Heart which I finished today. Thank you Grandpa, Dad, Andy, and Craig for the books. I saw a plethora of films and I began to write and blog more than ever. I bought the name kayleberty.com when I gave the blog a face lift (I was stoked to get comments from Dating Guru David DeAngelo).

My writing dreams saw new realization when Johnny G asked if I could cover for him on a writer’s trip. Writing for Just Luxe, I, with a group of eight over two and half days, visited six different hotels from Huntington to Laguna and did all sorts of fun stuff. The luxury living was a vivid contrast to my roughing-it camping in the great potato state. Hopefully more travel writing to come.

During my extended summer, I reconnected with friends, grew deeper in my relationships, and made some new ones. My network grew and grew and little did I know that God was blessing each and every one of these interactions. The sower who communes with God never sows in vain. I spent some valued time in Long Beach. I chilled with Millie, one of my favorite people. I hung out with Keith and company on several occasions including a trip to “The Price is Right” where he won 13,000 dollars. I visited “Real Time with Bill Maher,” the set of “Modern Family” with Michelle Hiller, and a taping of the sitcom “Melissa and Joey.” I was on cloud nine on several occasions.

This was also a time of stress. The finances were dwindling. The jobs were declining, coveted house-sitting gigs were not enough. I was worried about the future. I was having intense and vivid dreams almost every night- haunted by the manifestations of an anxious subconscious. I borrowed money, which I hate to do- I needed a solution before things got worse. Then one night, on my way back from Barns and Noble, the fortress of solitude for those who like the energy-buzz of people, I entered a time of prayer.

The next morning I received a call from Steve Corbitt, who I hadn’t talked to in months. I met him an hour later at an under-construction corporate building in Thousand Oaks. I met with some people and was offered a job that should last three or four weeks. The opportunity couldn’t have come at a better time. God bailed me out again.

I reflect on the words of Olaudah Equiano: “I considered that trials and disappointments are sometimes for our good, and I thought God might perhaps have permitted this in order to teach me wisdom and resignation; for he had hitherto shadowed me with the wings of his mercy, and by his invisible but powerful hand, brought me the way I knew not.”

God’s invisible hand. At the end of these four months I conclude that I can commit no offence greater than doubting His providence.

I linger on the wisdom of Howard Thurman: “Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”

Changing winds, a new chapter begins

Caleb S Garcia
October 16, 2010

Crusader

2010-10-19T19:19:00.000-07:00

A Spenserian stanza.

Crusader

Bullwhips, fedoras and leather equip,

A professor turned pulp action hero;

Who seeks old treasures in globetrotting trips,

Fighting Nazis who want to be pharaohs;

Questing for excitement not dinero.

Always of worth when not a tombstone;

A bad penny is never worth zero,

Crusading raiders are no ones to own,

He is adventure, he is Indiana Jones.

Caleb S Garcia

January 13, 2009

V. Diaries 2.5 "Kill or Be Killed"

2010-10-11T20:06:00.000-07:00

Also posted on VampireSite.

“Kill or Be Killed” is an ultimatum; self-defense is the most common justification of killing. In this episode, the principle does not apply in the literal sense. Caroline causes the death of two sheriffs, sheriffs who, along with Sherriff Liz, shot Stefan and Damon with wooden bullets and dragged them into a dungeon with plans to stake them. Although Caroline came to the rescue, no one ever tried to kill her directly; thus, the ultimatum is indirect.

Let’s talk for a moment about the nature of storytelling in television. Why do so many shows take place at or around a school setting? Because school is a gathering place, and a built in gathering place for characters to interact is most convenient. This has particular relevance in a town as small as Mystic Falls, thus the town has a Founder’s Ball, carnivals, memorials, Lockwood parties, dances, and this week: the Historical Society Volunteer picnic.

The picnic gives Caroline and her mother Sherriff Liz Forbes a chance for interaction- to be episode centric. I didn’t realize that Caroline had so many mother issues. Do we know why Caroline has such a bad relationship with her mother? Is mom a workaholic? And is Caroline’s father divorced, absent, dead, or simply never seen? The fact that both Caroline and Liz share the last name Forbes, leads me to think that he is dead.

All and all, this episode is one of the show’s best- there are some clever twists and surprise elements. First of all we get more Mason Lockwood, a fair object of Man Crush. We see him in Florida, the traveler that he is, and how he kills a man, and gains the curse. Mason has been in cahoots with Katherine for some time, and the episode ends with a very awkward kiss. I take comfort in the notion that there seems to be a huge age gap between Mason and Tyler’s father, rendering Mason as a young uncle who’s really more of an older brother (and perhaps should have been). Taylor Kinney is only four years older than Michael Trevino (Tyler), 29 verses 25. But it’s still a little awkward to see Uncle Mason mack out with 17-forever Katherine, right after he put the moves on Aunt Jenna too. Is this a backward hick town or what? This show would really be better if people played their own age.

I digress. At the picnic the action picks up. Mason gets his revenge on Damon by proving to Sherriff Liz that Damon is a vampire via vervain spiked lemonade. Thus the hunting begins, and after the Salvatore brothers are out for the count, blondie is fresh on their trail. If Mason and Damon are the show’s bravado, then Stefan and Elena’s puppy-dog love is still the show’s weak link. Speaking in code (“I can’t do this anymore…”), oh please, for some reason Elena insists on being in needy, bitch mode- she must, at all costs, avoid being Lana, because right now, the fun blonde is taking fan preference over the moody brunette.

Damon is onto “the code.” “Relationships are about communication,” he quips to Caroline. Damon is also the first to suggest that Stefan needs sheriff blood. Caroline agrees. “He said he didn’t want it,” Elena bitches. Calm down there Ms. Object of Desire, and stop trying to argue with Stefan, he knows a lot more than you. Elena and Caroline do share a nice moment toward the end, when blondie finally confesses that she’s been Katherine’s favor girl. And it is nice that Elena offers her own blood to her boyfriend when she finally gives in.

Episode side story: Jeremy gets screen time when he buddies up with Tyler and two cliché high-school chicks who like to party. Tyler flipping out and attacking Jeremy is uncharacteristic of Tyler. The attack could be a possible foreshadow. If Tyler were to kill a ring-wearing Jeremy, Jeremy would come back to life, and Tyler would trigger the curse- which he almost does twice. Tyler finally makes the adult decision and gives the moonstone to Mason. The rest is history, the moonstone better do something cool, and Candice Accola is gorgeous.

Caleb S Garcia

October 8, 2010

The Nature of Docudramas

2010-10-09T12:38:00.000-07:00

Part documentary, part drama, more historical than fiction, the docudrama is a type of film where the story is based on a true story, actors portray real people, and the dialogue is both made up and based on recorded exchanges. The 2010 smash The Social Network succeeds as a docudrama, and as a film, to the highest degree. It is unique in that the story covers four years, 2003 to 2007; it is a pioneer film in that it covers events from the recent past, this last decade. Thus a formula becomes recognized. The Social Network works because the characters, Zuckerberg, Eduardo, Sean Parker, the Winklevoss twins, are people who are not in the public spotlight being portrayed by actors who are.

Most docudramas about entertainers are made long after the entertainer’s prime career and sometimes after his or her death. Sam Taylor-Wood’s new film Nowhere Boy is about the early years of John Lennon, the release coincides with the 70th anniversary of Lennon’s birth. Music biopics like Walk the Line (2005), Ray (2004), and 2010’s The Runaways are popular examples. Musician docudramas work well because the actors are portraying musicians whose personalities are usually not in the spotlight. The casting is then built on resemblance, musical skill, and impersonation. The longer the musician has been out of the spotlight, the more the actor is drawing on nostalgia to recreate memories and pay tribute to that performer.

Oliver Stone’s lackluster film W. (2008) follows a similar pattern in that actors are not portraying other actors but other public figures. Because Stone tends to create a universe between history and fairytale, the actors are not going for realism but parody to some degree. And because the characters, George W. Bush, George H. Bush, Laura Bush, Dick Cheney, Condoleezza Rice etc., are seen in the public spotlight and live in the recent memories of the audience, a larger emphasis is places on skillful impersonation than a simple portrayal. As a docudrama, Stone’s World Trade Center (2006) does a superior job, while United 93 (also from 2006) is the pinnacle of quality filmmaking. Released the same year as W., Gus Van Sant’s Milk, in which Sean Penn portrays Senator Harvey Milk, is a much better example of impersonation and skillful acting that pays tribute to, and honors the nostalgic memory of, the late senator.

All this comparison is to say that docudramas are most difficult when actors are portraying other actors. It is here that the rule of nostalgia, distant collective memory, plays a key role. In the 1992 film Chaplin, Robert Downey Jr. received an academy award nomination for portraying English comedian Charlie Chaplin. The fact that Chaplin is primary known for his work in Silent films from the 1920s gave audiences less material to pull from to compare Downey’s impersonation. Chaplin is a docudrama gone right.

If the actor is still alive and in his or her prime, then the most common temptation is for the actor to play himself. This is seen in documentaries, mockumentaries, and (primarily) docudramas. In 2010’s I’m Still Here, Joaquin Phoenix portrayed a version of himself in a film that was part mock, part doc, and part performance art- the film is revolutionary. Other examples of actors playing themselves range from the zany John Malkovich in Being John Malkovich (1999), to small roles like Bob Barker in Happy Gilmore (1996).

Docudramas are a trend and with the success of The Social Network stories could be made that cover events from only a year before. Simple guidelines can make or break a docudrama. Let’s hope that future filmmakers take a note from past successes and analyze how they worked so well.

Caleb S Garcia

October 9, 2010

If "The Social Network" was in 1987

2010-10-08T22:57:00.000-07:00

The Social Network (2010)

2010-10-07T15:00:00.000-07:00

[A-] David Fincher’s The Social Network, adapted by the legendary Aaron Sorkin from Ben Mezrich’s book The Accidental Billionaires, is very educational. Being something between a documentary and historical fiction, the film is revolutionary. It is a rarity to find a film based on a true story that is so current. The film takes place from 2004 to 2007, from Mark Zuckerberg starting FaceMash in his Harvard dorm, to two different lawsuits that were settled in 2007. Usually docudramas are about the rise and fall of something, The Runaways for example. But here Sorkin and Fincher are concerned about the rise, the erupting volcano that is Facebook, and the path of destruction it left in its wake. The story ends, not when Facebook has reached its peak, for the peak has not yet been met, but when people actually realized what Facebook was: the largest, most successful social networking website in the world.

Although Facebook is still rising, the story features plenty of closure- in the form of settled dust, tied up loose ends, and milestones. It’s about how Zuckerberg became the youngest billionaire in history at age 23 in 2007. It’s about settling two lawsuits- primarily how co-founder Eduardo Saverin went from owning 30% of the company, to .03%, to 5% after the settlement giving Saverin a net-worth of 1.3 billion. The film features the first time Facebook got over a million members and, as the film’s poster indicates, 500 million members in 2010.

The film is a study of human nature, prodigies, and business. Zuckerberg is a unique character. Jessie Eisenberg delivers his strongest performance to date under Fincher’s entrancing direction. Mark is a prodigy. He lives and breathes codes and formula; he is obsessed with programming and won’t stop until it’s just right. It makes perfect sense that it takes someone as anti-social as Mark to make a social network. Motive is everything. Mark isn’t doing it for the money; he’s doing it to accomplish, to conquer. It may have started as a drunken rant against his girlfriend and a far reach to get into a high-rep Harvard club, but it became something far greater. Facebook as a world-wide obsession could only have happened through an obsessive personality. Mark sees code, writes code, and programs, and does it all with ease and speed. He is more comfortable in front of a computer than anywhere else.

All memorable stories can be told in unmemorable ways, but the fact that the film is so mesmerizing and captivating is a testament to the top talent that created this masterpiece. Fincher and Sorkin are both at the top of their game. Sorkin packs the story without ever rushing. Sorkin works best when writing about history, and The Social Network is a very unique piece of history. The typical eyes of present day nostalgia do not exist. Sorkin is reporting the facts in dramatic fashion and seeing if the audience is as impressed with Zuckerberg and Co. as he is. In some sequences, Fincher takes a break from dialogue. A rowing scene where the Winklevoss twins barely lose is filmed in slo-mo with the intensity of any war scene. Fincher paces and films with shadows and dark hues. He sets the mood by removing light and edits with voiceover like a true pro.

Things I learned: Websites must be interactive. In one evening, Mark created the interactive website FaceMash- students deciding which of two girls is hotter. Mark loves the numbers. He loves the hits and loves setting records. He doesn’t want to be friends with these people or even relate to them, but he does want to use them. For some business men, every person is a dollar sign. For Zuckerberg, every person is a hit and a potential forward.

Number 2: The hits are everything. Mark started by using the Phoenix list-server that he got from Eduardo (Jabberwocky, oh how original). From there he used other list-servers. The point wasn’t who got the link just that a lot of people did. The result was 22 thousand hits in one night. Anyone with a website, blog, or page needs to do the same thing if they want some traffic. Spamming strangers becomes less risky if you’re giving the people what they want. We all don’t have access to list-servers but we all have a personal network, and that network has a network, and so on.

The characters in The Social Network work because they are real. Sure they may not talk in Sorkin-speak, but the beauty of Sorkin’s dialogue is that he compacts a quantity of information into a conversation. The twins, Cameron and Tyler, are strong willed, vicious, and every bit compelling. Mark is a grey character in a grey world. There is no villain. There is only an underdog- a success story with multiple underdogs and those who fought a different fight. Andrew Garfield does an Oscar-worthy job as Eduardo, capturing the emotional essence of a torn man. My only complaint is how Eduardo freaks out when people accuse him of animal abuse. Eduardo, though, is a tortured soul with daddy issues, and a man who truly gets screwed when he goes from owning a chuck of the stocks to owning virtually nothing. The falling out between Mark and Eduardo is tragic.

Facebook is a testament to the power of “free,” and the idea that “cool” equals no advertising, aka no pressure, no catch. There’s nothing people hate more than a scam, being lied to, or mislead. Sean Parker (Justin Timberlake) knows this, and appeal of Parker as being everything Mark is not, leads Mark out of his social comfort zone and into the big lights. Like Facebook, Fincher and Sorkin succeed because they give the people what they want. Like Facebook, The Social Network is the little movie that could, the one that took everyone by surprise. How do you get someone hooked on drugs? The first few are always free, then the person becomes addicted, then the price goes up, and then the person is paying more money for less of a high. Hats off to you Social Network, easily one of the year's best.

Caleb S Garcia

October 6, 2010

V. Diaries 2.4 "Memory Lane"

2010-10-02T20:49:00.000-07:00

Also posted on VampireSite.

A stroll down “Memory Lane” is, like memory itself, selective and convoluted. Memories cannot be fully trusted; they walk the line between dream, nightmare, and nostalgia. Unlike a flashback, “Memory Lane” opens with a dream, one that Katherine implants in Stefan’s mind. The dream is based on real events. Katherine and Stefan dance at the 1864 Founder’s Ball and Stefan is so smitten with her that no compelling is necessary.

Other flashbacks prove to be authentic memories. Katherine initiates the memory of the Ball and Stefan remembers walking Katherine to her room and declaring his love for her- “I kiss you and I know that I’m falling in love.” Although Katherine is proved right, any love that Stefan had for Katherine has since died out. Katherine, of course, doesn’t believe this and insists that Stefan is dating Elena so he can (vicariously) “fall in love with [Katherine] all over again.” Actress Nina Dobrev’s insistence on playing Katherine with her chin down, blank stare, and half puckered lips, makes Katherine a parody of herself.

Katherine reveals some interesting factoids about 1864. It was George Lockwood, a werewolf, who helped Katherine escape from the burning church that killed 20+ vampires. Said killings were Katherine’s idea. Most importantly, Stefan’s father Giuseppe laced Stefan’s drink with vervain in an attempt to kill Katherine (Remember Damon’s confession to Jeremy that “My father hated vampires too”). This weakened Katherine enough to get her arrested but she was never in any real danger of death because she made a deal with George to save her in exchange for the MacGuffin moonstone (Although George, being a werewolf that hates vampires, could have betrayed her). More importantly, Stefan and Damon try to save Katherine from being taken away but the brothers are shot by their own father. Fortunately, the two already have Katherine’s blood in their system- and the rest is history.

Actor Taylor Kinney continues to steal the show as Mason Lockwood. He’s a lone-wolf, confident and masculine, who doesn’t take crap from anyone. Mason strolls down a different memory lane when he visits old high-school friend Jenna. Damon and Alaric arrange the reunion to learn more about the resident Lycaon. Mason though, clad in his usual mystery and capability, is already on to Damon and gets all his innuendos. Mason knows his history and doesn’t want to start up an age old feud with Damon that doesn’t apply to them. But Damon, being Damon, tries to kill Mason with a silver knife. Apparently no supernatural beings are harmed by silver. Hmm, did Mason, in an attempt to make Damon strike first, deliberately use his hand to take out the piece of pie instead of using the silver knife just so Damon would think that he is allergic to silver? It’s either genius or sloppy writing.

What is sloppy is that Caroline obeys Katherine’s orders without a flinch. Blondie obeys because Katherine “has killed her once and can do it again.” Why Caroline doesn’t disclose this information to Elena or Damon is beyond me. Well Caroline’s blondness is later used against her when Stefan and Elena fake a fight in order for Katherine and everyone else to believe that Katherine has succeeded in breaking the couple up. I sense that that there will be many more strolls down many more memory lanes in the future. Here’s hoping.

Caleb S Garcia
October 2, 2010